It is Sunday, and I have some free time to write while I am doing laundry. I am feeling a little better today. This morning we were given the opportunity to attend church, but I declined, not choosing to follow the traditional organized religions. I told one of our Drill Sergeants that I had something of a personal relationship with God and simply wanted a quiet space to meditate while the others went to church. Today's military is all about political correctness and accomodating diversity, so I was granted the request (I'm not sure if this would have happened the first time around when I went through basic, as I used to get a lot of flack for wanting to meditate). I was able to sit in a quiet classroom and meditate. Or should I say, I tried to meditate, and I was mostly fending off sleep. I suppose my body is too deprived of rest at this point to effectively pull it off. One of my battle buddies, Pvt. Pear, from the platoon accompanied me, and she got a chance to catch up on letter writing during the process.
The weather has been mostly decent here, though it is cool and rainy this morning. Nevertheless, it's still a departure from the Pennsylvania winter and snow I left behind. Early in the mornings, we wear the following uniform for PT: short sleeve shirt, long sleeved shirt, sweatshirt, shorts, and sweatpants, with a greenish/grayish winter hat. The "winter PTs" are also called "the marshmallow suit" by some people. It is still in the 20s or 30s in the morning, but warms up during the day. Otherwise, we're usually wearing ACUs without the BDU field jacket, and a patrol cap. Temperatures in the day have ranged in the 60s, but as it drops, it can get very cold standing in the last formation in our summer PTs.
Yesterday we had a class on unarmed hand-to-hand combat, or "modern Army combatives". I learned some interesting moves. We are supposed to have another class on this later on.
There are two girls that I know of in my company who are currently trying to get out of the Army. One apparently tried to go AWOL yesterday but was nabbed before she made it very far. There is a lot of discussion here in the laundry room about the various ways one could try to get out of the military. Most people are upset because the Drill Sergeants have been telling them that everyone will be going to Iraq. Really, I don't think this should come as a huge shock!
I've pretty must resigned myself to the fact that I'm going to stick this out, and finish what I've started. I've had more bad days so far than good, but I suppose that is to be expected. My mood is improving with time, as I'm beginning to feel more "normal" here and accustomed to the routine. I am slowly beginning to talk to more of the females in my platoon, and in my bay. I am not happy to be here, but it is getting a little bit easier.
I did get a chance to use the payphone again yesterday, but was unable to reach my husband. Our phone calls are few and far between, and the Drill Sergeants have told us that this will be the last phone call we are able to make while we are in "Red Phase". Some people who were unable to reach their families or significant others broke into tears, but there was no cadre member around this time to drop them for pushups for the trangression.
...
It is later in the day, and I've just finished working on a detail, even though this is supposed to be our "free" day. I spent time checking sizes on protective (gas) masks and assembling the elements of M-16 cleaning kits. I've also been making an attempt to organize my wall locker to meet inspection standards. Of course there is more stuff in here than seemingly will fit neatly, but I'm doing the best that I can.
I'm finding myself feeling down again. I wonder if this is what everyone is going through? I miss my husband horribly, and not being able to talk to him was a tremendous disappointment. I'm just trying to "suck it up and drive on", as the Drill Sergeants advise. Some of the others in my company are still doing their best to get out of the Army. One of the girls seems to be on the path to receiving a dishonorable discharge. She has already received two Article 15s. Earlier in the day she refused to follow the orders of a Drill Sergeant. There seem to be a lot of people devising strategies to try to get out... and we've only actually only been in BCT for less than a week now.
Earlier today, one of the girls in my platoon was giving me a hard time. She must have heard about my having many years of college, and was throwing it in my face. As platoon guide, I was having trouble counting everyone in my platoon, because they refused to cover down and kept shifting around in formation. This girl made a snide remark "This girl can't count. I guess anyone can get a college degree!" I confronted her in front of everyone and asked what her problem was, and she wouldn't back down. I told her that I wished she would get selected next for the position of PG so that she could also incur the wrath of the Drill Sergeants and have to deal with the stress of keeping accountability. I later found out that no one seems to like her in the platoon because of her attitude. To her credit, later she apologized to me.
...
I just returned from chow. If anyone in my family saw the way that I eat now, they would likely be appalled. Imagine pigs slopping up at a trough - that is an approximate characterization. I do not eat anything that requires cutting with a knife. For dinner, I chose noodles, a corn/bean mixture and an orange. I spent most of the alloted 2 minutes for dinner peeling the orange, and that was about all I was able to shove in my mouth. If I take any longer to eat, the Drill Sergeants immediately begin pressuring me to leave the DFAC. I know that I'm not eating enough, as my stomach is always rumbling with hunger, and my stool is at least 1/2 to 1/3 less of what it was before, maybe even less. If I don't come out of this having lost a lot of weight, I will be stunned.
Tomorrow, or possibly later today, we are going to the PX/Shoppette - the highlight of my week. How sad is it that an opportunity to purchase such items as Baby Wipes inspires such excitement for me. Something is wrong with the showers in the barracks, and there is only ice cold water, so having Baby Wipes would help alleviate our misery.
I will tell you a little about my platoon's Drill Sergeants (names changed to protect the guilty?). I believe my platoon lucked out in having the three best DSs of all the platoons in the company. DS Pontiff is a bit of a hardass, and a combat veteran with lots of Hooooah experience. DSs Tora and Nobliss are more easy-going. All of them are activated Reservists from Florida. We seem to get smoked less often than the other platoons. One of the platoons has a DS so tough that many of the girls come upstairs into the barracks crying after they've had a formation.
DS Nobliss is a medic, and since he believes that personal hygiene is important, told us that we have permission to take showers after lights out if we need to. Being able to do that makes a huge difference. Imagine 99 females in two bays, usually only about 20-35 minutes of "personal time" each night, and very few showers to go around. We're not allowed to change in our rooms (which have no doors), so everything has to be done in the latrines. Also imagine 99 females whose menstrual cycles are beginning to coincide, and the prospect of everyone PMSing at the same time...lol.
I'm in the barracks now, and a fistfight has almost broke out for about the third time today amongst the females. Holy crap. You wouldn't believe some of the drama that goes on here - it's amazing.
Next week we have our first road march, and Victory Tower. The latter entails crossing a number of rope bridges, ropes, and rapelling down a 60' wall. I know I'm probably going to fall off the ropes, but at least there is a cargo net to fall into. Victory Forge was around the first time I went through basic, and that was my experience then. ;> I am actually looking forward to the rappel.
Wow, another fight almost broke out in the hallway. This place is a madhouse.
Well, at least some of the girls in my bay seem to be bonding, and generally, it is getting better. The one chink in the armor is my battle buddy, White. She keeps leaving her stuff strewn about our room, and my bunk continues to get tossed because of her crap (she is on the top bunk, and I am the bottom, and the Drill Sergeants do not differentiate when she leaves stuff on the bed).
Unfortunately some of the females here are having some personal hygiene issues. I don't understand why anyone would not want to take a shower here... even with the cold water.
Sunday, January 29, 2006
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