secretarmygirl

#157 - Blog status

2007-09-08T21:00:00.000-04:00

I originally had continued my blog entries to follow my time in the civilian world, and as an Army Reservist. However, I realized that most people were just interested in the sections on basic training and AIT. So, I've decided to just leave up the BCT and AIT blogs, and some occasional updates with any questions that are sent my way.

Thanks for reading, and for all your comments!

#156 - Basic training Q & A

2007-04-06T07:16:00.000-04:00

I know, I've been bad about updating this blog on a timely basis. Life's keeping me a little busy these days. However, I will take some time out to post some questions that someone recently e-mailed me about basic training. If anyone has different answers or additional input (especially those who might have recently finished BCT), please be sure to comment. I'll probably do this again in the future as folks e-mail me, as these may be questions that others might have about basic training.

>- What would you absolutely tell me not to bring?

I guess this depends on whether or not you will have someone come to visit you at basic training graduation. You will be allowed to have items at AIT that you cannot have at basic and some folks like to bring along various items like electronics knowing that they want to use them up until they are taken away from them at BCT and that they can have them the minute that they are allowed again. However, if there was something valuable, I suppose there is a risk to bring it to BCT if you can't use it there, as it will be immediately locked away in a closet or room and thrown into a heap with the bags of everyone else in your platoon. There is the chance that something in that room could be damaged (for example, Fort Jackson humdity can be really bad, and electronics might not fare very well left in an unairconditioned barracks closet for 2+ months), or even stolen. I don't know if I mentioned it on my blog, but when I was in basic, people broke into those "secure" rooms on more than one occasion, or there were times when the DSs would have to let someone in there to retrieve a personal item, so theft is always a concern.

Other than that, I would say to not bring whatever they tell you is contraband. If you smoke, you can smoke up until the airport or wherever they pick you up. They have an amnesty room at Reception in basic training where you can anonymously ditch your cigarettes, porn, knives, or whatever is on the list (the list is actually kind of funny, but after I met a lot of folks at basic, I knew some of them were probably bringing every single item on that list). If there is something you still had until you got there, it's wise to get rid of it at that point, because you will undergo a full "shakedown" of all of your belongings at Reception, and again at basic training. You do not want to get caught with contraband items during shakedown.

>>- I heard that some people had the opportunity to use their cell>phones?

I don't know if this is something that has changed since I was in basic, but when I was there, this was not true. However, there were always rampant rumors about it happening, and the Drill Sergeants said, "No way in hell!". I suspect that it is something that they still may not allow because of what basic training is all about: the militarization process. Early on in BCT they want to cut your ties with home so that you will harden up and more easily turn into a soldier. They probably worry about people calling their loved ones on the cell phone every night and crying, and maybe about someone sympathetic saying, "It's ok, come on home" or something. I suspect that if you are told by people at the MEPS that they are not allowed, then this is true. Your best bet, however, is to ask your recruiter for the names/numbers of some people who have just come back from BCT as split-ops, or have finished BCT more recently at Fort Jackson... At this point now it has been over a year since I graduated from BCT, so it's possible that things have changed. I will tell you this - people did use their cell phones on the day before family day when we got all our personal stuff back, though I don't know if they were supposed to.

>>-What would you say was the hardest part?

That aforementioned part about militarization and separation from loved ones, by far. Being cut off from the opportunity to talk to and see the folks you love was the most difficult. You will go through a lot of difficulty in those first few weeks, and it's tough to do so without the support that you would usually have from the people closest to you. If anything, it may make you into a good letter writer, if you aren't one already. I got through it by spending all my free time writing to my husband, and telling him all the details of the things I was going through... It was as close as I could get to talking to him, and I think getting mail from me every day made it easier for him too. It was very difficult for me emotionally until I started getting mail back from him early on in BCT, but when his letters finally began to arrive, it made all the difference in the world to my morale. Once that connection of constant (albeit delayed) communication was established, I was a lot happier.

>>- Can you use razors?

We were allowed to have some of the non-electric kind, but honestly there wasn't a lot of time for shaving and long showers until later on in basic. However, maybe you'll luck out and have a Drill Sergeant like mine who would let us take showers as long as we wanted to after lights out so we actually had proper time for personal hygiene.

>>- I know you said you got the Pill when you were down there, but are>you allowed to take some with you?

You can bring them with you, but you need to bring a copy of your doctor's prescription with you, and they will call to verify. Also, see if you can bring a few months' supply with you. Make sure that the fact that you are on the Pill is noted by the MEPS health personnel somewhere in your records before you ship to basic, and that will undoubtedly make things easier for you. The last thing you want to do is to suddenly go off the Pill in basic and have your cycle all screwed up in that environment... for me, it was rather unpleasant!

>>- What did you do when you were out in the field and had your>period?

I brought a lot of pads in plastic baggies, which I separated into smaller bunches and had to stuff in my pockets... luckily there are about a million pockets in those ACU uniforms on your shoulders, chest, legs, butt... The only embarrassing thing (sort of) was when you had to come off the range and go through "shake down", and of course you would have to empty your pockets. I always left the pads in the plastic baggies and the Drill Sergeants didn't paw through them. The other females were also good about helping each other out when I was there, and offering feminine hygiene products if you ran out.

The bad part is you can't really take anything for cramps, bloating, etc. but if you get ibuprofen for some other ailment, hold onto a few for your period... or keep your ears open and you will undoubtedly find someone else who has them, and may sell (yes, there is a BCT black market for such things...lol) or give you a few. You might get in trouble, though, if you are caught with "drugs" that weren't prescribed to you. I know it sounds silly, as this is something you could buy over the counter at home, but everything has to be done by the rules there. BTW I suppose you could use tampons, but they are strongly discouraged, because there really aren't any facilities for washing your hands when you're out in the field, and you do get really dirty. We ended up buying a lot of those little hand sanitizer bottles at the PX and would always keep a bottle of two in our pockets, especially for visits to those nasty porta potties. Everyone was always getting sick, so it's important in BCT to do everything you can to avoid it.

>>- Do you have to wear Bcg's all the time, or can you take them off if you>dont need to use them? And do you have to wear them in AIT?

We were made to wear BCGs all the time through basic, but you could wear civilian glasses in AIT (however, there were a few times I chose to wear my BCTs in AIT when I knew my civilian glasses would be too roughed up in the field). If the Drill Sergeants knew that somebody was issued BCGs, they made them wear them... though a few girls that had halfway decent eyesight but still had BCGs issued to them just hid them right from the beginning, and no one was the wiser. I suppose you are taking the risk, though, of not having them if you need them, and of getting in trouble if they found out somehow. Some people said that they really just needed them for seeing long distances like qualifying on the range, but they were made to wear them all the way through BCT.

#155 - I am home!

2006-08-26T15:27:00.000-04:00

After being on active duty for training for 7 months and 7 days (according to my DD-214), I am happy to be home. I've dreamt of returning ever since I left in January. It is a wonderful feeling. There are many people, places and things that I've missed, and I have a lot to catch up on. More on that later.

But in the meantime, since several of you having been asking for it, I am beginning to post journal entries from my time at basic combat training. These entries will be posted in chronological order beginning on the date I left for BCT on January 17th, 2006. Use the "Archives" navigation section to look through these earlier entries. I will begin by posting excerpts from my first 10 days in BCT, and will continue updating this with several each day until all are posted.

#154 - AIT Graduation

2006-08-24T10:08:00.000-04:00

This is the day I've been waiting for... graduation from AIT!

Our uniform for the graduation ceremony was Class 'B's (the green dress uniform without the jacket), and was held in the battalion headquarters. The ceremony included the showing of a video about AIT at Fort Gordon, and speeches from several speakers including the brigade LTC. We were handed "fake" diplomas - I'm guessing that the real thing will come in the mail later. The only honor graduates came from my class, and I was awarded the title of distinguished honor graduate for having the highest average over a 95 in my class. Unfortunately this might mean that my unit might expect me to know what to do...lol. Anyway, the ceremony was relatively short, and I departed immediately after.

I will miss many of my classmates. Honestly I didn't care for a lot of the people I was with AIT with, but the folks in my class were an exception. We had some really good people in the 25B class. Hopefully we will all try to remain in touch with one another.

My husband drove to Fort Gordon to pick me up. We drove home (taking a nap or two along the way). Crossing over the state line and knowing I wasn't far from home was a nice feeling. We stopped for breakfast at a Perkin's restaurant shortly thereafter. When we were paying for our breakfast at the register, the manager came over. She said, "There was a gentlemen who just walked out the door a few minutes ago. He left money and instructions to pay for the breakfast of the woman in uniform."

Wow. A total stranger picked up the tab for our meal. That was really kind. I suppose that there are a lot of folks who are appreciative of those in the military who are serving their country. :)

#153 - 21 August - supposed to be the last day... ;p

2006-08-21T15:54:00.000-04:00

It is 10:32am, and today is my last official day on active duty, at least according to the orders I have in my wallet. Unfortunately I'm stuck here until Wednesday, as they are keeping us for the graduation ceremony. I wish it was optional.

At least I was able to spend the weekend with my husband. On Friday night I received an overnight pass and didn't have to be back at the company until Sunday afternoon. I was the only person in my company of 330 people to apparently receive the privilege. My husband said that this might be my payback for being a squared-away soldier for so many months...

My husband is "working from home" in the hotel for the next few days while he waits for me to be released from Fort Gordon. Luckily he has a job in IT which can afford him such privileges. We stopped at the post PX this weekend and picked him up an Xbox 360, so I know he'll also be suitably entertained. I also bought a nice speaker set for my Ipod. Have to take advantage of the tax-free shopping at the PX before I leave here...

The graduation ceremony is Wednesday at 4:00pm, so with any luck, we'll probably be on the road by 4:30pm. I'm planning to help my husband drive, so hopefully we'll make it home by early Thursday morning if we drive straight through.

It still doesn't feel "real" that I'm leaving here yet... in the same way that it took awhile for it to feel "real" when I originally enlisted in the Army.

I've been spending most of my time lately in these final days just thinking about home, and planning for the future. It's hard to believe that I've been doing this for 8 months. Sometimes I have my doubts, and wondered what I would have missed out on if I had chosen another path, and decided not to enlist in the military. There are times when I felt that I've been missing out on civilian life. Sometimes I've been angry at myself to having chosen this particular path, but I guess I didn't come into this blind. For whatever the reaosn, this is something that I felt the need to do. Luckily the difficult part of it is almost over.

#152.5 - A few photos

2006-08-20T05:09:00.000-04:00

<-- Cleaning weapons in the dayroom

<--- You can never have enough Q-tips!

<--- Tired, and ready to go home

#152 - Capstone - day 4

2006-08-17T15:47:00.000-04:00

Last night I was attacked again by fire ants while I slept. I have 17 ant bites on my face, and dozens on my hands and feet. I am one big, freaky-looking itch! There are so many unpleasant insects in the South. I won't miss any of them when I leave Fort Gordon.

Well, it is Thursday, and I'm back at the barracks. I have left Capstone a little bit early, and am missing out on today and tomorrow. Honestly, I don't think I'm going to be missing out on much. We've already finished with the ranges, and completed our MOS validation. It sounds like much of tomorrow is going to consist of a Capstone graduation ceremony, and cleaning up the FOB where we were staying. My battle buddy Jeanene is being sent home from AIT several days early because of her upcoming deployment to Iraq. She needed a battle buddy, so I've been accompanying her all over base for outprocessing, which involves visits to every conceivable place on post to make sure you've fulfilled your various obligations (going to the dentist to get your records, library to show you have no overdue books, etc.). The fringe benefit of this is that I've been also taking care of my outprocessing along with hers, since we have to go to all the same places. The rest of my classmates will have to wait until Monday to do their outprocessing. Unfortunately it doesn't mean that I will necessarily get out of here any earlier, but at least I will have fewer things to worry about for the remainder of my time here.

<--Jeanene packing up

I am really happy to be out of the field. We had a long day yesterday, and it was tiring and boring. I worked on an ammo detail stuffing magazines with blanks and live rounds, listening to the guys tell a lot of off-color sex jokes. The only highlight of my day was helping some Sgts to dissassemble a huge radio tower (the thing was amazing - super light and everything fit into a suitcase-sized pack). Another attempt at "personal hygiene" yesterday was once more interrupted by a simulated attack. This time the role-players had M-16s hidden under their robes. They pretended to pray, then opened fire on our encampment. We were also roused during the evening by a "sniper". I guess this kind of thing would be more fun if you were into war games. Maybe I would be if I wasn't so tired. Guess that's how I slept through the aforementioned fire ant attacks.

#151 - Capstone - day 3

2006-08-15T18:56:00.000-04:00

It is 9:31am, and I am out at another rifle range. It's still the morning, but already unbearably hot, especially wearing all of this equipment. I've already finished today's range, which is "reflexive firing". It is essentially an exercise where you must hit targets in certain ways as they are being called, i.e. "Walk five meters. Turn right. Two shots, left 10 meters."

Tomorrow is a convoy live fire range, where we shoot at targets from the back of a moving truck, then disembark to fire at other targets after the truck stops for a simulated IED. Some of the students are wondering why we also have to do a convoy live fire range, since everyone had to do this in BCT not that long ago... I guess they figure that folks will encounter convoys in Iraq, so it's just additional training.

Yesterday we began "MOS validation training". This is a time where everyone sits around the computers, attempting to figure out what to do, and trying not to look stupid in the progress... ;p

After our MOS training yesterday, our camp, er, FOB (forward operating base) was surrounded by a group of simulated protesters. One of them handed us a brochure telling us to go home to "the land of Wal-Marts and Britney Spears" (I thought that was a nice touch). The protesters were peaceable until one of them decided to jump our barracade, at which point they were "shot".

At bed time we were also attacked. This came at an inopportune moment for me while I was in a state of undress in the tent. Shots and simulated artillery rounds were going off everywhere, people were screaming and running around, and I was throwing on clothes so fast I put my boots on backwards. It was entertaining.

This is day three of Capstone, and we are all starting to smell. The cadre are going to allow us our first (and only) shower tonight. One can only imagine how pungent the odor is being around people wearing all kinds of equipment in 100+ degree weather, some of them not changing into fresh clothes, after several days and several nights. This morning I experienced an olfactory memory of some of my days in archaeology brought upon my these smells. The persistent malodor brought me back to the days when I used to work with two archaeologist hippies that rarely showered. This was the same crew led by a whacko that used to brag about sleeping on garbage in the back of his van. It's been a long time since I've thought of those people, but being here lately, it's not that much of a stretch to close my eyes, draw in a deep breath, try not to gag, and remember...

It is 6:56pm and I'm happy to report that I've finally gotten that shower...aaaaah! However, stepping back out into the Georgia heat sort of negates the effect, and the positive feelings are short-lived.

I survived another day here, but I'll certainly be glad when this is over with. My body is riddled with fire ant bites all over... so many, that it looks like I have chicken pox.

<--- An inside look at D-MAIN

<--- Jeanene tries to catch a catnap in our tent, which wasn't easy in the 100+ heat

<--- Guarding the perimeter during one of our "attacks"

<--- My battles trying to keep themselves entertained while waiting at one of the ranges

#150 - Capstone - day 2

2006-08-15T15:26:00.000-04:00

It is the second day of Capstone, and 10:27 in the morning. I am out at the rifle range, and just finished zeroing my M-16. I decided to adjust my firing technique from what I had been doing in basic training, moving the rear sight away from my face. I really didn't want to get another black eye!

I actually ended up firing a lot better this way. On my last clip, I even got all of my shots in the same hole. Maybe I'll do better when I qualify next time.

We began the Capstone field exercise yesterday. We initially met in a gym and had to be separated into two groups of about 35 people each. You were either assigned to a site called D-MAIN or D-TAC (the former was co-ed, and the latter males only). We rode a bus out to our site (I am at D-MAIN) and set up cots in several large Army tents. Unlike basic training, we have the luxury of having a fan in our tent. Granted, it's still summer in Georgia, and will always be hot, but even having the hot air blow around does make a difference.

Even though we were split up, I'm still with a lot of folks from my class, which is a good thing. A lot of the other folks are younger kids with a short MOS school (5 weeks compared to our 20+ weeks). I don't think they've quite gotten out of the basic training-mindset, because they are treating me with respect, addressing me by my rank, and even occasionally going to the rank of parade rest with their hands interlocked behind their backs. I suspect that some of these folks with shorter AITs haven't had a lot of E-4s around... it's a little weird. Someone remarked that maybe the people coming into the Army with college and higher ranks are choosing longer, more technical AITs. Maybe there is some validity to that notion, I don't know.

#149 - Capstone - day 1

2006-08-13T15:21:00.000-04:00

Right now I am inprocessing for Capstone, our final FTX. We are in a gym where a Drill Sergeant is barking out orders, and all I can hear is a series of unintelligible echoes in a basketball court. It's about 100 degrees outside, and not much cooler in here. I'm wearing a full set of ACUs, an IBA (flak jacket), LBV (vest with pockets for ammo clips), pistol belt w/canteen, and a 100-ounce Camelbak, which will soon be depleted. I have been drinking a lot of water already. It certainly feels like August here at Fort Gordon.

Capstone is the last requirement I must meet to graduate AIT. Basically, it is five days in the field. In the morning, we go to the rifle range. In the afternoon, we practice MOS skills that we should have learned in our military training at AIT up until now. I don't know a lot of details about what the Capstone experience will entail, but that is my general understanding of what I have to look forward to.

I really am anxious to get this over and to return home. I have lived away from home in a military environment since January, and it seems like it's been forever. My husband and I have a lot of plans for the house when I get back. I have been gone a long time, and there is a lot to get caught up on.

#148 - Class photo

2006-08-11T19:37:00.000-04:00

This photograph was taken by one of my classmates at AIT. This was taken during one of our last few classes. Note the beret flying through the air!

I'm pleased to report that we finished our
last class today, and everyone made it.
We leave for Capstone, the final field exercise,
on Sunday.

#147 - Last day of class

2006-08-11T06:52:00.000-04:00

Today is my last day of class. We have a test this morning that I'm a little nervous about. Apparently it's so hard that the highest anyone has gotten in the last few classes is a 80%... or at least that's what some of the instructors have been saying. The high average I've been trying so hard to maintain will probably take a pretty bad hit.

The class I've had all week has been very difficult, and stressful. I don't feel like I am adequately prepared for what we've been going over in this class. It's an uncomfortable feeling, to say the least.

I'm not very happy because they are keeping us here until August 23rd instead of August 21st for a mandatory graduation ceremony. To be honest, I'm not really that interested in attending an actual graduation. Most of my classmates only want to have their certificate in training, and be let loose...

On Sunday, we will be leaving for Capstone, the final field exercise at AIT. We will return on Thursday. Then we are being kept here until the following Wednesday, even though everything left here (mostly outprocessing) will only take a day. My husband is driving down here next weekend, and then staying until I am released, for a total of five nights in the hotel. Between the hotel, food, fuel, paying for a dogsitter at home, and miscellaneous costs, it will turn into an expensive trip for him. Oh well... at least it is really almost over.

#146 - Almost...over!

2006-08-08T15:09:00.000-04:00

Ah... I'm almost outta here. It's so close, I can almost taste it. Just a few more weeks. After today, I have only nine days of training, and a few days after of "recovery" and outprocessing.

#145 - Suggested items for AIT

2006-08-06T12:17:00.000-04:00

Folks who are planning to attend AIT after basic training usually wonder what they are allowed to bring with them, and what items might make life a little easier to take. Such a list can vary, as policies differ by post and individual company, as well as by a person's interests. I have compiled a list of some items which I have found useful to have in my possession at AIT, and a few suggestions of things that other folks here with me have in the barracks.

- a Camelbak (or other make of) hydration pack

I opted for a model which holds a good amount of water (~100 ounces) and has enough space to carry my gear (book or tablets for school, poncho, water bottle for class, and ink pens). Camelbaks on this post are only allowed in military colors like the ACU pattern, DCU pattern, foliage green, or black... no purple/pink combos or other odd color schemes.

- a cell phone loaded with features

It is true that there are payphones on base, but almost everyone at AIT has a cell phone. Most have features such as a built-in camera, ability to send text messages/e-mail, or play MP3 files. I have a Blackberry-like Samsung phone which allows internet access. This is a luxury as getting on the internet can be very challenging here since owning laptops is forbidden by many companies.

- MP3 player or CD player and music

Almost everyone has one of these. I have a 30GB video Ipod which I update with new music and podcasts every few weeks. I've also tried listening to the local National Public Radio stations on a small radio, but reception in our cinderblock barracks building is fleeting, and I mostly rely upon the Ipod for entertainment.

- portable DVD player and movies

I don't have one of these, but many people do. The rule of thumb for owning personal electronics in our barracks is that it must fit into the cargo pocket of a pair of ACU pants... anything larger is generally verboten.

- civilian clothes

Storage at AIT is limited, but after a soldier "phases up" and receives off-post passes, most rush out to purchase some civilian clothes for the weekends. The selection of clothing at the PX on base is quite limited, though more options exist with a visit to the local mall. Many people have family or friends at home mail them their favorite clothes. At any given time, I only have room for about 2 or 3 outfits in my locker.

- storage chest

My company allows soldiers to possess a black plastic storage chest or footlocker. These are indispensible for all of the items which you cannot easily fit (or display) in your locker, or for a temporary holding area for clean laundry you haven't gotten a chance to properly put away. Storage chests must be locked and are available here for about $24.00 at the PX.

#144 - Slang!

2006-08-04T16:04:00.000-04:00

I have learned a lot of new slang since I've enlisted in the Army. Some of these phrases are military terms, and some are just the language of the youth. Not knowing all of these made me feel really old compared to some of my fellow students. We had a lot of laughs about my lack of relative hipness compared to the youngsters... ;> Kevin and Jeanene, pictured here, laughed at me quite often!

broke off - to cause pain, injury and/or failure: "The 1SG really broke off a lot of people in this morning's run."

my bad - I have made a mistake and admit guilt for it: "I should have warned you that the Drill Sergeant saw you sleeping; my bad!"

tore up - a mess, an injury, or other negative physical manifestation, used as an adv.: "It looks like the Drill Sergeants were in your room, cause your battle buddy's bunk is all tore up." or "She never cleans her uniforms - she's always tore up like that."

the one you want - a desired choice or outcome; also used as an affirmation or confirmation to an action: "A 300 score on the PT test - that's the one you want!"

baby daddy - literally, the father of a woman's child(ren), or potential/desired father, or most often simply a boyfriend or love interest: "That Drill Sergeant so hot, I wish he were my baby daddy!"

Drill Private - a soldier of a lower rank (E-1 through E-4) who tries to assume control of a situation whether or not it is assigned and order everyone around; this term was sometimes applied to a student holding the position of squad leader or platoon guide: "That Drill Private is letting that little bit of power go to their head!"

soup sandwich - as a visual would suggest, a messy and unpleasant item, most often applied on an individual level: "He's a regular soup sandwich."

bam! - an affirmation (con gusto) or acknowledgement that an individual is in agreement with what they have just heard or witnessed; also an expression of enthusiasm, often heard during formation or PT sessions: "That's my Drill Sergeant! Bam!"

you pump me up - an acknowledgement of inspiration; this phrase is sometimes offered in jest or sarcastically: "Student 1SG, you pump me up!"

a hot mess - a negative term applied to a situation of physical location; roughly equivalent in meaning to a hot, steaming pile of feces: "Soldier, you look like a hot mess."

blue falcon - also known as bravo foxtrot, a euphemism for buddy f***er; a battle buddy who has proven to be anything but: "That blue falcon got the entire platoon in trouble!"

ate up - similar in meaning to tore up; a negative term usually applied to someone's personal appearance, or attempt to carry out a desired action: "Private, you're so ate up that your kevlar is on backwards."

GI party - two words which have caused thousands of soldiers to collectively groan; a prolonged period of mandatory, enforced cleaning and maintenance of the barracks or other area: "Privates, we're having a GI party tonight, and y'all are invited!"

shammer - an individual who lies or exaggerates a condition, usually medical in nature, in order to avoid an activity: "That shammer couldn't do PT because of his sore leg, yet I saw him running through the barracks this morning."

that's the wrong answer - a response to information given that is not adequate or acceptable to an individual's expectation: "So that's why you're late to formation again? Soldier, that's the wrong answer!"

e-nothing - a disparaging term for a Private having the pay grade and rank of E-1; these soldiers do not have rank insignia to speak of to wear on their ACU caps or blouses, and are sometimes teased by those of having a higher rank: "That e-nothing is hard at work being a Drill Private!"

you don't know me like that - a phrase which means you are not an individual's friend nor family member, and are therefore denied the right to speak to them as such, or harbor an expectation of a behavior that said relationship cound entail: "Soldier, you don't know me like that. Stand at parade rest when you're speaking to a Drill Sergeant! Who do you think you're talking to, your big, fat gym teacher? Get down and push! Grab yourself some real estate!"

#143 - Heat Cat V

2006-08-03T13:45:00.000-04:00

It's another day in AIT at Fort Gordon and the temperatures again hover around the triple-digit mark. I've been going to the gym every day to work out on an exercise bicycle, but it's getter rougher as the temps climb. I've been on medical profile for a few weeks now, and will be long after I leave here. Sometime in basic training I developed severe shin splints in both of my legs, stress fractures in my feet, and tendonitis to boot. Unfortunately my profile has barred me from any kind of running, jumping or marching. When I am finally able to run again, it's going to be difficult having to start over from scratch.

The other folks in my class had their EOC (end-of-cycle) PT test this morning (I did not have to take it because of the aforementioned profile). This signifies that the end of my time in AIT is indeed near. As of today I have exactly 2 weeks of training left. I have been away from home since January 17th, and it seems like this has gone on for an eternity. More than 7 months of being a trainee, and seven months of being screamed at by Drill Sergeants. I wonder if it will be an easy transition back to the civilian world? What will I do when nobody is there to punish me if I forget to make my bed in the morning? Or when there is dust on my shoes, or dust bunnies on the floor? How will I be able to deal with slowly enjoying a cup of coffee in the morning while lazily waking up to NPR and the internet? What about those weekends of sleeping in with the dogs and my hubby? Somehow I think I'll make the adjustment just fine. ;> I only need to get out of here! Almost done... almost done!

#142 - The oddities of life at AIT

2006-08-02T15:25:00.000-04:00

Each of the AIT companies has the distinction of its own company motto. This is a saying (or in my company's case, a longer construct) that the soldiers have to sound off with upon command. Some companies have very short mottos, whereas my company's motto is the exact opposite. Close you eyes for a moment and imagine having to sound off with this piece... My battle buddy Jeanene has the distinction of leading this as the company student First Sergeant.

This is the sound of revenge
Steady, breath, aim, squeeze, boom let the rounds go
This is the sound of revenge
Steady, breath, aim, squeeze, boom let the rounds go

Stop, collaborate and listen
Bravo's back on a brand new mission
Don't complain when your company's missing
Can't take the heat get out of the kitchen

(1SG) Alright PGs that just wasn't crunk enough.
Front leaning rest position move.
In cadence, exercise (platoon guides begin to do pushups)

Ahh push it, Push it real good,
Ahh push it, Pu Pu Push it real good.
Don't you wish that you were in Bravo 369
Don't hate cause your motto ain't as dope as mine.

(1SG) Alright that was a little better.
PG's recover.
Lets get serious!

This is serious
We can make you delerious.
You should have a healthy fear of us
Cause too much of us is dangerous,
So dangerous, your whole entire company is scared of us

(1SG) Alright Bravo, what do you think Charlie and Delta thought about our motto?

Oh I think they like me,
Oh I think they, Oh I, Oh I, Oh I think they like me.
(Females) Oh I think they like me cause they heard us on the other one so it's only right that we...
(Everyone again) Hit 'em with another one.
(DANCE DANCE DANCE) Lean with it, Rock with it, Lean with it, Rock with it.
Bravo!!!!!!

#141 - 3+ weeks to go!

2006-07-27T15:19:00.000-04:00

I am happy to report that the end of my training is only about 3 weeks away. Other than 2 short trips home, I will have been away for BCT and AIT for seven months. I'm ready to get on with the rest of my (civilian) life, and to become integrated into my Reserve unit back home.

In a few weeks I will begin the task of posting my basic training journal to the blog. I managed to find time to write home every day during basic. The letters ranged from a simple postcard to ramblings many pages in length, and covered every facet imaginable. These entries will begin to be posted on this blog at the end of August.

I did not record my AIT experience in the same way for several reasons. AIT wasn't the same kind of experience as BCT. Most of my daily routine consisted of waking up, PT, and attending classes all day - not exactly the most riveting thing to read about. However, I did write about several subjects while at AIT... everything from how Drill Sergeants at AIT compare to those in BCT, what my experience was like in the FOB (forward operating base) training, to life in the barracks. These will begin to also be posted in a few weeks... stay tuned.

A few notes... The Drill Sergeants like to move us around in the barracks from time to time. I was just starting to get comfortable in my room, but we had to move all the way down the hall into another one. Those of us who are in Phase V+ status have been finally been allowed to have civilian linen. Not having to make your bed with hospital corners in the morning is a plus when time is at a premium!

Unfortunately my foot has still be bothering me, and I ended up being on profile again for the last few weeks of AIT. I hate this... I hate being injured, and feeling like some kind of sick call ranger. I really need to have my foot looked at by a civilian doctor when I go home. At one point, my foot was feeling better, and I even volunteered to participate in a 10k (~6 mile) race on post. Here is a photo of a few of us from our company after the run:

I never thought I would be able to run for 6 miles. Before I shipped for basic training, I could barely run a block without being winded. I suppose this is why it has been frustrating to have injured my foot. I feel like I'm going to lose all of the progress I've made in running over the past several months.... Oh well.

#140 - 1 1/2 months into AIT... a few observations

2006-05-14T11:49:00.000-04:00

I've been here since April 1, and the time is thankfully beginning to go by fairly quickly. We've been at Phase V status now for around 3 weeks, which has made a considerable 'quality of life' difference. My husband drove from PA to GA to visit last weekend, and I've submitted a pass request to go home for the upcoming Memorial Day holiday weekend. :)

The weekdays generally have been flying by, as we're kept busy. Here is a typical day's schedule:

Wake at 4:20am
Finish getting dressed, brush teeth, etc. and make bunk
In formation by 5:00am
PT (physical training) usually runs from 5:30am-6:30am

Drill Sergeants lead PT sessions from these stands each morning on Barton Field

Return to barracks for a quick shower and "barracks maintenance" (quick sweeping of the rooms, dusting off shoes, taking out trash), change into ACUs
Leave for DFAC (dining facility) with my battle buddy at about 7:20am
Eat breakfast from about 7:35-8:00am, then walk to classroom building
Class from 8:30am to 4:30pm, with breaks at 10am & 2pm, and lunch at 11:30am

Some of my IET classmates waiting to return to class after chow

Stop at DFAC again for dinner on way back to barracks

Change from ACUs back into PT uniform to be in formation by 5:45pm
Formation officially begins at 6:00pm, and mail is distributed. For some reason we're usually kept standing around for a very long time in formation... 1 1/2 hrs is not uncommon (groan)

Personal time usually begins after we are released from formation. During this time, my battle buddy and I will sometimes walk to a nearby pizza place to obtain internet access or study for an upcoming test, go to the PX, or get dinner if we've somehow missed it earlier.

Bed check formation falls somewhere between 9:00pm and 9:45pm. We must wait for every person's name to be called, at which point that individual runs into the barracks and prepares to sleep. As there are 200+ people in our company at any given time, this can take awhile if your last name falls at the end of the alphabet. ;p

Once or twice during the week, sleep is interrupted by having to pull a hall guard duty shift. This runs for 2 hours (usually 10-midnight, midnight-2am, or 2am-4am), and entails little guarding and much cleaning (hallways, latrines, laundry room, etc.)

In the beginning of my AIT experience I thought that PT was on a par with what we had done in basic, but it has gotten more difficult. Our last few runs have taken place around the legendary Barton Field and have been at least 3.2 - 3.5 miles in length. In basic training I never ran more than 2 miles. I wasn't sure if I would be able to complete a longer run here, but have been pleasantly surprised at my progress. I am actually considering participating in a voluntary 10k (~6 mile) running event next weekend here on base. I don't know how long I'll be able to hang in there, but I'd like to give it a shot.

#139 - Phase V !

2006-04-30T11:56:00.000-04:00

Jeanene and I exploring Fort Gordon in civilian clothes with our newfound freedom

It has been nearly a month since I first arrived at Fort Gordon. I have been in classes for 2 weeks now, and over the past week completed the steps that come before the 'phasing' process. I had to retake my PT test (previously missed the situps by 1), and my platoon had to take a written test on general Army knowledge, successfully pass a Class 'A' uniform inspection, a wall locker and room inspection, and a barracks inspection. Luckily everything went fine, and I am now considered to be a 'Phase V' soldier. This status brings new privileges which weren't allowed as a 'Phase IV' soldier. We are now allowed to wear civilian clothes and to leave post on the weekend, and are treated a little more like humans instead of basic training holdovers.

This weekend, Jeanene and I celebrated our newfound freedom by going off post to... the mall! Yes, I know, this doesn't sound like a big deal, but for someone who has pretty much been in lockdown status since January 17th, something like going to the mall is a big deal. I bought some clothes, jewelry, a case for my Ipod, and enjoyed an iced coffee drink and a gyro. Later we were able to log onto the internet at a pizza place, and had some Mexican food at the Cinco de Mayo carnival on post. Any time spent away from the barracks is always a good thing.

I realized that most people who are in Phase V status here seem to celebrate by getting very drunk. During our last two 'Phase V' formations at night over the weekend, I witnessed several males becoming ill and vomiting... in formation. My partying days are long behind me, so I don't expect to be replicating their experience anytime soon.

My husband is planning to visit next weekend, and I am very much looking forward to seeing him again. :)

#138 - At the library

2006-04-15T15:09:00.000-04:00

I am writing this post from a library computer at AIT. Thus far I have been at Fort Gordon for exactly 2 weeks. We are in Phase IV status, which is something like still being at basic training. Very few privileges have been afforded. My platoon is scheduled to transition to the next phase in two more weeks, upon the successful completion of a barracks and wall locker inspection, passing a written test, and passing our next PT test. Hopefully at that point I will be able to successfully phase and receive more privileges, including the opportunity to obtain internet access on a regular basis. I have over seventy letters written home during basic training from which to write a BCT journal for this blog. More to come...

#137 - Back in the barracks

2006-04-14T07:08:00.000-04:00

It is 7:01am, and I just returned from breakfast. I had to miss PT this morning because of my injury, so I will go back to my room to do pushups and situps on my own. I have to return to sick call this morning at 11:00am for a re-eval for my foot. I ended up aggravating it against while we were marching outside the company yesterday. Our Drill Sergeant was making us do all kinds of facing movements, one after another "Right face...march! Left face....march! Right face...march! About face! Left face! Right face!" I was having trouble executing them smoothly because of my injured foot, and got yelled at by the DS. When I tried to explain that I was on a no-marching profile and wasn't supposed to be doing this, I was given a loud "at ease!" (basically told to shut up). *sigh*

It is 10:44am and I am at sick call again waiting for my appointment. I was actually able to walk here by myself without a (gasp!) battle buddy, and I will be forced to eat alone at the DFAC for lunch afterwards. It is weird sometimes to be without a battle buddy after we've been forced to have one for so long. It feels like I'm almost getting away with something! Since January 17th I have always had someone with me at Fort Jackson or Fort Gordon, wherever I've gone. The exception to the battle buddy policy at AIT is medical appointments, but you are still supposed to have a battle buddy with you in other scenarios.

Not that I wouldn't mind having Jeanene along this morning. I told her that I was very pleased that we were assigned to be battle buddies. Actually, I've found that unlike White in BCT, I really enjoy her company, and I think she feels the same. I'm sure we'll come out of this as friends. It's just a shame that we didn't know each other in basic training. We were both stuck in other platoons with people that we mostly didn't like. Maybe having a good battle buddy now is my reward for putting up with White for 2 1/2 months!

Our Drill Sergeants spoke with us this morning and told us we will likely have two more weeks until the phase change. So, in theory, I may be able to get a weekend pass two weekends from now. Wouldn't that be wonderful... I can't wait to see my husband again!

We will not be having an on-post pass this weekend. Jeanene and I are going to see if we can at least obtain permission to go to the library, which isn't far from the company. We are thus far forbidden from going to the local pizza joint, where internet is also an option. Any food that doesn't come from the DFAC is verboten to those still in Phase IV status.

It is 12:06pm, and I am currently at the Reserve liasion's office waiting to submit a copy of my profile (those in the NG and Reserve must keep their liasion apprised of such things). The doctor at sick call was nice to me. He said, "You don't seem like a malingerer, so I'm going to let you write your own profile." I should have written "no pushups, no situps"...just kidding. Actually he recommended another week of wearing running shoes instead of boots, and a no running/no marching/no jumping profile. We'll see if the rest makes any difference.

It is 1:00pm, and I am sitting in a hall waiting for some kind of ceremony to begin. My platoon has been brought here by the Drill Sergeants to be spectators at some event of which we have no prior knowledge. Apparently we've been brought along simply to bolster the numbers in the audience. I think it's humorous, but not surprising.

I thought I might have gotten out of having to come to this event, but I was snagged earlier by a girl from my platoon who is a bit of a goody-two shoes. I'm glad that Jeanene is my battle buddy instead of this girl, as she would probably drive me crazy. She's always a little bit too worried about getting in trouble. I'm certainly not someone that tries to get out of duty, but right now I'm limping around, and I would have really appreciated not having to march across post for some ceremony. ;p

#136 - The FOB, an epilogue

2006-04-13T09:01:00.000-04:00

It is 4:08pm. Today was supposed to be a recovery day after the FOB. We still had to make early formation for 5:00 am (really 4:45am), but we didn't have to do PT. Instead we had to pick up our weapons from battalion, which entailed spending a long time waiting in line. Then our M-16s were cleaned for at least 4 or 5 hours straight. It was extremely boring, but a necessary evil. The weapons have been turned in now, and I am waiting for others to finish. We have been continually turning in weapons at battalion and checking them out again, though I have no idea why. I'm not sure if our DSs know what is going on, as it seems like the plan has been changing. From what I have heard, we are supposed to be holding onto our M-16s for the next two weeks for "weapons immersion". This is a concept in AIT where you are supposed to get used to having your M-16 with you 24/7. It seems rather redundant, as we all just came from BCT where we had our weapons for two months straight. I don't see what another two weeks here would add to the experience.

Everyone is hoping that maybe, just maybe we won't have to participate in weapons immersion. Carrying around the M-16s all the time is a pain. You have to tote them into the chow hall, sling them over your back, and watch them while you eat. Sometimes the Drill Sergeants will try to "steal" them away if you put them on the floor under your table. An unsecured weapon is a big deal. One day a DS was able to go around and pick up an armload of M-16s. The smoking session for the folks that lost their weapons began with 85 pushups, and progressed from there, ending with some rifle PT. You can bet they won't be making that mistake twice. I guess maybe this may be the reason why weapons immersion needs to continue...

It is 7:26pm. I'm happy since we are back in the barracks, and I'm able to have my cell phone again to keep in touch with my husband.

We are still in the dark here as far as information goes. We don't know when our MOS classes are beginning, and don't know what we will be doing in the interim. We don't even really know what is expected of us at the company, nor even what is supposed to be going on tomorrow. Yesterday we had a formation at 6:00pm. The DFAC closes at 6:15pm. No one told us we were supposed to march ourselves to dinner beforehand, as the DS had told us to stay in the barracks. We figured that we had better risk it and flee for chow, as it was getting later and later, and the prospect of dinner was becoming less of a certainty, so we went on our own. Half the time it seems like we are doing things based on the advice of other folks who have been at AIT for awhile, because the DSs here don't always put out all the necessary information. This is, by far, my biggest gripe about being at this company. Tell us what is going on! We don't know what to do, and what we're supposed to do if we are to avoid getting in trouble.

It is 9:01pm, and I was just able to sneak in a little catnap in the barracks. I'm still sleep-deprived, but slowly catching up. Luckily it looks like none of the girls in my room have duty for the next few days, so we might actually be able to.

#135 - The FOB, day 7

2006-04-11T06:18:00.000-04:00

It is 8:50am, and I am just finishing up a guard tower shift. I spent two hours up in the tower talking with one of the NCOs, Sgt Meno. She is unlike the MOS-Ts that I just described in my last posting... an exception to the rule here. I like Sgt Meno.

It is now 12:40pm, and after lunch. Earlier I had guard duty again, and am returning in a few minutes for another shift. I had duty again with Sgt Meno. She knew that I was dead tired, and didn't give me a hard time about it. I am so sleep-deprived right now that I was almost hallucinating... or so it seemed. I repeatedly thought I saw a deer walking through the FOB. Not a good sign. I still have a supply of the instant coffee packets to get me through the rest of the day, but I'm really hoping they will let us catch up on sleep when we get back to the barracks.

It is 4:37pm. We just finished a detail picking up brass and links (from SAW ammo) outside the FOB. It is Heat Cat V and quite toasty this afternoon. Yes, Georgia can be this hot - even in April. I can only imagine what fun a Northerner like me will have in this heat come August.

Other than my two guard shifts and this detail, I didn't do much today. Earlier my squad had a class and participated in a live convoy fire exercise. The Drill Sergeants had me sit it out since I was on profile, and was also pulling a guard shift. At one point one of the Sgts told me to go into our tent and sit down because I didn't have a battle buddy and there wasn't anything to do. I laid on my cot and waited for someone to come back. One of the other girls came back and threw a fit because she saw me laying down. She started to bitch and slam her equipment around because I was able to sleep and she was not. Actually I wasn't sleeping - there is no way in hell that I could attempt that in this heat, especially inside the tent where the temps are intensified. I didn't really care about this girl being angry, as she's not one of my favorite people here. She has been rude to me (and many others) the entire time we've been at the FOB. A few days ago I had guard duty with her, and she told me that she thought the Army turned her into a monster. From what I have experienced of her behavior thus far, I'd venture a guess that she was well on that path before ever enlisting in the military...

I'll just be happy when we are done here. My battle buddy Jeanene has been gone most of the time, and there isn't really anyone in my FOB platoon that I like talking to here. I've mostly chatted with Sgt Meno. There is also another girl here I've talked to that is a radical Christian. It has been interesting to hear her perspectives and some of the more wild aspects of her belief system. Mostly I've just been sitting here quietly by myself if I have some free time, as I'd rather not talk to anyone else.

It is 6:18pm, and I'm back at the barracks. The FOB is over, and I'm happy to be back at my company... if such a thing is possible.

#134 - The FOB, day 6

2006-04-10T16:14:00.000-04:00

It is 1:01 pm. The weather is warming up, and it's a sunny afternoon. We had a computer class this morning, and are about to start a new one. Lunch was MREs.

Thanks to my platoon mates at the FOB, I have been restocked with packets of instant coffee. The caffeine enabled me to stay awake during this morning's class. Others in my platoon were caught nodding off, which is never a good thing.

It is 1:52pm, and we are taking a break from instruction. I was just chatting with one of the AIT students, a Sgt who is reclassing from admin to 25B. She was surprised to hear that I am nearly 35 years old, as she thought I was 18 or 19. Apparently I confused some of the NCOs, as they apparently had a discussion about how mature I was for my "age"... lol. I hope people think I'm also half my age in about 10 years.

We've been learning about some Army-specific stuff that I probably shouldn't delve into in this blog. It has been somewhat interesting. I think any subject matter that's a little different from the usual BCT content is a refreshing change, at this point.

It is 4:14pm. I've been checking out the little heaters that are in these giant Army tents. My interest is personal, as my husband and I have one of these same tents at home that we occasionally use for camping. There are small heaters that run on diesel. The fuel is supplied from a jerry can that is suspended from a tripod outside the tent (fumes outside for ventilation). One of the smaller ones I've seen is called the SHA heater and is made by Hunter Manufacturing. I might have to look into picking one of these up for our Canadian camping adventures. We haven't yet been to our property in Nova Scotia yet in the winter, but I'm sure it gets pretty cold...

We are apparently hanging out now waiting for the other platoons to finish, and presumably chow. One of the other AIT reclassers was just trying to draw me into a conversation where he was going to try to make me look like an ass. I declined the obvious bait and walked away. His name is Specialist Gareth. No one seems to like him, as he has thus far been perceived as being a jerk. He is only a SPC and treats the MOS-Is here worse than the Drill Sergeants do. He seems poised to evolve into an NCO of the variety that is dying for the chance to assert their authority and ill-treat their subordinates. So far I haven't been impressed with most of the MOS-Ts here that are reclassing. Many (but not all) of the ones I've met so far seem to treat the MOS-Is with disdain. They can be rude and quite unprofessional in their attitudes to the newer soldiers, which is very disappointing. On the one hand, I could understand their frustration with having to deal with the folks fresh out of BCT, who are generally much younger and less mature then they are. On the other hand, I believe they could be doing a better job as mentors. If I was a Private and thought that the Army was comprised of people who were constantly going to look down upon me and treat me like shit, I know I would be discouraged. This is another case where I'm glad that I've already met the folks in my Reserve unit at home, and know everyone there is great. If I hadn't done so, I might be a little worried at this point.

#133 - The FOB, day 5

2006-04-09T10:21:00.001-04:00

Still at the FOB. Today has been pretty boring. There are a few of us (mostly profile holders) here on detail while the rest of the platoon is out running around in the woods. I have swept, picked up trash, cleaned portable sinks, and miscellaneous other tasks. The time is passing at a painfully slow rate.

I have another letter ready to mail out but haven’t gotten the opportunity to do so yet.

I am missing my battle buddy. Most of the people in my FOB platoon are ok, but I haven’t really bonded with anyone. I had what started off as a promising conversation with one female, but it quickly turned into proselytizing about how her life is committed to Jesus Christ. That, I could deal with, but this girl has become brainwashed into believing that women should be subservient to their men. I kid you not. She actually told me all this crap about how women steal away men’s power, how a man should be the only one in charge of a household, business or relationship, and how God has spoken to her about her mission to educate women in the Army about their gender-based failings. It was downright creepy. I didn’t have the heart to tell her what I thought about her beliefs. If she begins preaching to me again, I will probably do so. Praise the Lord! Religion is fine, but the other stuff is wacky.

Last night we were woken on four occasions by the attack "siren". My psychic abilities have been serving me well, as I knew when three out of the four attacks were going to occur. The fourth time happened when I was sleeping, but I woke right up before the siren went off.

Our camp is a roughly rectangular area surrounded by walls filled with several feet of sand in between and capped by concertina wire. There are about 10 large sleeping tents, and 5 classroom tents. Five small bunkers are behind half of the sleeping tents – this is where we must run during the aforementioned "attacks". One corner of the complex houses four porta potties and a few portable sinks. There is a dining facility tent in another corner, and a few small outbuildings. Two of the sides have entrance gates, and each corner of the fence has a guard tower. There is a sand pit in the center surrounded by sand pags for hand to hand combat practice, and a large covered pavillion that reminds me of an open aircraft hangar. The main gate has several vehicle barracades. This FOB is our home for the time being.

1:20pm

It’s after lunch, which I helped to serve as part of the detail crew. I have been walking around looking for something else to do, unlike the malingering females I was put with. They have spent a considerable amount of time avoiding work by hiding in one of the sleeping tents. They were angered when I refused to condone their laziness. Luckily these girls aren’t in my company, and I won’t have to deal with them when the FOB is over with.

3:29pm

I am now on guard duty high above the ground in a tower. It’s actually pretty cool up here. We have a big SAW (squad automatic weapon) at our disposal, but I doubt we’ll be "attacked" right now. One of the guys here has a Blackberry-like device, so I’m going to see if I can borrow it to dash off a quick e-mail to my husband. That would be cool! I didn’t think I would be able to contact him at all this week, but so far I’ve phoned, sent several letters, and might be able to send an e-mail.

The day is dragging here. My platoon is getting their asses kicked out in the lanes (woodline). I’ve been told that they have all been getting picked off by the Drill Sergeants after being made to run up and down steep hills in deep sand. Glad that I’m mising out on that fun!

Earlier I had a conversation about Iraq with an AIT reclasser, a Sergeant who had been over there. He told me a lot about what kind of items you should bring over there, i.e. one trunk of at least three months of comfort (junk) food, laptop, Ipod, DVD player, etc. He said that WiFi was offered at the camp he was stationed at for $1.00/hour. Somehow I think that as a 25B I would have internet access…

Damn it, I’m down from the tower now, and I was unable to e-mail my husband. The girl I was with hogged the Blackberry for the entire time we were up there. I’m pissed. All I asked for was a few minutes to send a quick e-mail to my husband, and she ignored me. She kept reading her e-mails out loud the entire time, telling me about how some guy thought she was cute, how someone she knew from kindergarten contacted her, ad nauseum. I was looking forward to e-mailing my husband and am disappointed to have missed the opportunity.

I’m not very happy in general with the people that I’ve been stuck with at the FOB. I am looking forward to returning the the barracks at my own company, and back to my regular platoon.

Monday 04/10/2006 10:20am

I am still out at the FOB and currently in a computer class. We are taking a class on computer security and learning what you can and cannot do on a DoD PC. We heard a story about how a Specialist at one of the posts was caught saving gay porn photos (featuring himself) on the network. It boggles the mind why someone would feel compelled to save this on a work computer... especially an Army computer!

I found out that the Army does have some kind of web cam system that I can use if I am deployed. There is also chat (IM) authorized, but only through AKO. I guess I’ll have to find out the particulars of all of this as I go along.

Well, I’m almost halfway through Monday. A day and a half more out here, and I’ve heard we’re probably packing up sometime on Wednesday morning. I am looking forward to being able to call my husband when we get back to the barracks. No word yet on when our classes are starting. I even asked one of the reclassers here (most are NCOs) thinking that perhaps they had more information, but it is still a mystery.

I had tower guard duty this morning from 3:00am to 5:00am. I cradled a SAW on my shoulder for two hours, but the shift was uneventful. The girl in the tower with me told me all about how the Army has transformed her into "a bad person". She claimed to be a meaner, crueler, more uncaring version of herself than who she was at home. This conversation, albeit mostly a one-sided rant, went on for the full two hours that I was trapped listening to her in confines of the guard tower. I really didn’t know what to say to her – that is, if she had given me the chance to speak in response! I’m beginning to feel that there are a lot of people here who have some serious issues.

#132 - The FOB, day 4

2006-04-08T06:12:00.000-04:00

It is 5:20am, and I am writing this with the tablet propped on the edge of my M-16. I am waiting for the others to arrive for first formation. I guess I'm always early, which is a good thing.

I actually received about seven hours of sorely needed sleep last night. Of course the air raid siren was sounded right before bed, so we had to run for the bunkers. At least there weren't any alarms sounded throughout the night. I just needed to catch up on sleep. I'm still not feeling like I've caught up on it, but at least I'm a little more rested than yesterday.

Rumor has it that we might be able to go in for showers today. One of the other platoons had showers last night, and everyone else was jealous. I'm not as funky as most because of the shower I got on Thursday. This morning we are supposed to have PT (in ACUs and boots), so that will not help the situation.

We had formation, and are now sitting around, unclear as to what we will be doing, or when it will begin. I've gotten used to it being often like this. Get up early, hurry up and then do nothing. I'm beginning to think there is truth to the adage of "hurry up and wait" in the Army.

The wind is picking up, but it hasn't rained yet. I have a feeling that it will come this morning. I will then don a poncho that will almost reach to the ground. I miss having clothing and equipment that fit properly.

I believe chow is coming around 7:00 or 7:30am. I will actually be able to drink some coffee, as opposed to simply ingesting the contents of the instant coffee packets. It's not Starbucks, hell, the stuff they bring isn't even comparable to bad gas station coffee, but it has the desired effect. Out at the FOB we have usually been having hot As for two of our meals, and MREs for the other. It's not as hard on the body as a full diet comprised of nothing but MREs. They usually have some kind of sweets offered (such as donuts for breakfast and cookies or cake for dinner), but I usually decline.

It is 10:06 am, and we are currently taking a class on using walkie-talkie-type radios. These things are heavy and clunky, like most military equipment, and built to withstand heavy use and abuse. The class has thus far been a barrage of acronyms with little explanation of the terms nor concepts behind them. They may as well be speaking in a made-up language of gobbledygook for all the good this info is providing. I am not impressed with this particular instructor. It seems like it is being taught to the MOS-Ts (AIT reclassers) who have already had experience with the radios, but the MOS-Is (initial entry training) are left in the dark. Hopefully I will be able to retain something from this instruction, in spite of the instructor's delivery. This morning I had a cup of coffee augmented by two packets of instant coffee grounds, so I am doing ok thus far. You have to love caffeine!

It is 12:27pm, and we just finished lunch. It has been raining and thundering here intermittently for several hours. Our radio class went all morning. We had to configure settings on the radio in a set timeframe to pass the class.

It is 6:12pm and I am sitting in a gymnasium. We had to come here to escape a thunderstorm (guess the lightning was perceived to be too much of a threat in the field). We had a class on map reading and GPSing, but were interrupted to go to chow at the DFAC (at least we had real food!). The map reading was very basic.

It's probably not a bad thing that I'm on profile right now. Just the march to the DFAC here has gotten my foot throbbing. We are supposed to be doing a long course in the woodline over the next few days that is going to involve a lot of running, being chased, and whatnot. I don't think I will be able to do it on my profile.

Sigh... I am beginning to get tired here... mentally as well as physically. I am ready to start the classes in my MOS and leave some of this BCT-type of stuff behind. The fact that I'm 35 years old next month and still have to ask permission to go to the bathroom is beginning to really bother me. Seeing other companies receiving privileges while we cannot is also difficult to bear. I told Jeanene yesterday that we've ended up in what is the equivalent of our BCT company here at Fort Gordon. Oh well... I guess I just have to suck it up and deal with the crap for the next several weeks until we have our phase change. Hopefully things will get better. I can only have hope for the future, because I certainly can't expect it to be shitty here for the next 5 months.

#131 - The FOB, day 3

2006-04-07T15:46:00.000-04:00

It is 12:39pm, and I am back at the FOB, getting ready to leave for my sick call appointment. I ended up staying at the hospital last night until 2:00am. The hospital personnel finally told me that Moora had been admitted, and someone from my company came to pick me up. They brought me back to the barracks, where I slept for two hours before having to go back to the FOB. Today, I am tired as hell. I'm kicking myself now for not trying to sleep more in the hospital waiting room. At least I was able to catch a quick shower back at the barracks, so that was a benefit.

This morning we spent four hours learning more hand-to-hand combat. I wasn't able to participate in all of the moves because of my foot, but I still learned some valuable techniques. In particular, there is a choke hold that you can put on someone that can cause them to pass out rather quickly. I don't know if I will ever have a chance to utilize any of these techniques, but I suppose it's good stuff to know.

It is 1:44pm and I am waiting to leave for my appointment. There is a strong, cool wind blowing, and it is a sunny day. It would be perfect weather to be lying out in a hammock for a nap. I wish I could do that right now. I am so exhausted, and sleep is constantly on my mind.

There are more rumors floating around amongst the AIT students. Everyone has a different idea about when we are supposed to have a phase change (from IV to V). To confuse matters, it seems like every company's cadre does it a little differently. So there are some folks who say they are getting a phase change right after the FOB, while we might have to wait a full month. I wish I knew exactly what was going on. The lack of information from our Drill Sergeants is very frustrating to deal with.

Someone also told me that certain AIT students are allowed to have POVs (private vehicles) here. They claimed that 4 or 5 people are chosen from each company, and the privilege is limited, because they just don't have enough parking for everyone. The same person told me that laptops are also allowed here. I guess I will just have to wait and see. I have heard so many different accounts that I do not know what to believe here (I later found out than none of this applied at my company).

It is now 4:11pm, and I'm on my way back to the FOB. I have a 7-day profile for my foot. The doctor believes I have tendonitis. At least it's nothing serious. (Little did I know that my foot would continue hurting me for the next 7 months, and still hurts as I type this in October).

A little bit later now, 7:48pm. The folks in my platoon are beginning to know me as the girl who is always writing in her little notebook. ;>

The sun is beginning to set. The weather is temperate now, but we're supposed to receive rain tomorrow... just in time for morning PT. I believe we are going to be conducting some MOUT training tomorrow.

#130 - The FOB, day 2

2006-04-06T20:00:00.000-04:00

It is 11:11am, and I have a few minutes to write. We are taking a class on how to use a computer mapping program that uses GPS. It's pretty cool technology.

This morning I went to sick call, but they were too busy to see me, so I have another appointment for tomorrow afternoon. The one benefit of going was that I was able to drop a few letters in the mailbox. I forgot how much I enjoyed communicating with my friends and family.

Last night I was actually able to get a good six hours of sleep. I still need more, but I know tonight's will be less than that, since my platoon is slated for duty. I also fully expect the cadre to mess with us in the form of some kind of attack. Usually this involves hearing a loud siren sound, at which point you have to drop whatever you are doing, and run for a series of bunkers behind the tents.

It is 2:16pm. My location has changed, and the level of excitement has ratcheted up a bit. I am now at the hospital. I accompanied a girl from my platoon who abruptly passed out during our computer class. I know Moora from BCT at Fort Jackson. She was in another platoon, but I have spoken with her before at basic training. She was assigned to my platoon for the FOB, and I've been chatting with her over the past few days.

The temps are getting hotter, but I know that it's not even really hot yet. We didn't even do anything strenous today. After lunch we sat in the classroom, and I looked over at Moora, who was sitting next to me. Her face was lying on the keyboard. It looking like she was just on the verge of falling asleep. I subtly began nudging her so that she would wake up before the cadre caught her "napping". She didn't respond to me, and I signalled for help, just as everyone else started to notice that something was awry. There are a number of E-4s and E-5s in my class who immediately sprang into action. I was next to her, so I helped them get her out of the chair and onto the floor. I began undoing her boots and unblousing her pants (Red Cross training!) while they took her ACU top off. After that, everyone was booted out of the computer tent so that first aid could be administered without an audience. Later they brought her out under the covered pavillion, and booted out everyone again. I then volunteered to be her battle buddy, as she needed one to accompany her while the cadre were around her. I witnessed several Drill Sergeants and Sgts attempting to administer IVs, unsuccessfully. They weren't able to keep her conscious for more than a few seconds at a time. We went to the hospital in an ambulance. Hopefully Moora will be ok.

I just ran into another girl at the hospital that I knew from BCT at Fort Jackson. She's been stuck here without any money for lunch so I gave her a few bucks. There are only a few people here who were in our company from BCT. It seems that most of the folks in my AIT company went through basic training at Fort Benning.

The platoons we were assigned to at the FOB are completely arbitrary and comprised of people from several different companies. My battle buddy, Jeanene, is in another platoon. I think we were both bummed out about that. You know, it's funny... there are definately some smarter folks here, on a whole, compared to some of the people I went through BCT with. However, many of the girls I've run into aren't very nice. It's as if they are intelligent and they know it, and look down upon everyone else. There are two bitchy girls here in particular who really rub me the wrong way. Females are also the minority here, unlike my BCT company. So the odds of finding a pleasant female to converse with are not as high as I would like (you can't always talk to the males, lest it appear to be "fraternization"). Maybe that's why I'm already missing my battle buddy. I like Jeanene. I wonder how my experience in BCT would have differed if I was in her platoon instead of being paired with White.

There are two other "newbie" females in my company (and my room in the barracks) besides Jeanene. Jacyln is not a 25B, but a 25S (I think that is a satellite communications MOS). She seems nice enough, but I haven't bonded with her yet. Gemini is an older woman (that is, my age) of Indonesian descent. She is nice enough. Gemini is also a 25B like Jeanene and myself. We have expressed interest in trying to do well at AIT and spending a lot of time studying. I think we will all fare well.

Jeanene told me today that she is finding out more and more that we are like-minded in many ways. For one, we hate being late, and try hard not to get into trouble. We are always first out the door to formation with Jacyln and Gemini right behind. Like me, Jeanene is most concerned with keeping up communication via snail mail and phone with her man (I think he's a Sheriff's deputy). She told me that on the weekends that if I don't have plans with my husband, that she would be happy to accompany me to a book store, or maybe even the historic district in Augusta. Sounds like we are going to get along just fine...

There is a TV here in the hospital waiting room. Today on Larry King Live there is a special on "the world of polygamy". Darn... I won't get to see it. ;>

It is 3:00pm and I am still at the hospital. One of the Sgts told me that Moora is recuperating and will be ok. That is good news.

4:24 pm... still here. I'm spending my 2nd day at the FOB at the hospital, it seems. I wonder what I am missing out on. At least I am currently having an enjoyable respite. I am seated at a Starbucks within the hospital enjoying a tall caramel frappacino and a vanilla caramel treat. I am likely to spazz from the sugar influx. It has been a long time since I've treated myself to such decadence. I feel like I'm getting away with something... I purchased some chocolate to bring back for my battle buddies at the FOB.

I've been watching CNN here. I have missed the news, and knowing what's going on in the world. They are already discussing the 2008 Presidential election and a rumored ticket of McCain and Falwell. Are they talking about the Rev. Jerry Falwell? What about the Democrats? Who are the contenders? There is also a story about the Scooter Libby intel link.

I generally don't watch TV at home, but I do miss listening to National Public Radio, and occasionally the BBC. If we are allowed to have personal electronics, I might have to pick up a small radio so that I can listen to NPR in the barracks. It will probably be an el cheapo model, as I keep hearing that thievery runs rampant at my company.

I have also been passing the time here talking politics with a civilian. I think she is as bored as I am. Unfortunately Starbucks has closed up for the evening, so I can't rely on an influx of caffeine to keep me going.

It is amazingly 7:43pm and I'm still here. Luckily I had a calling card on me, and was able to use a payphone to call my husband. It was really nice to hear his voice, as I hadn't expected to talk to him at all during the FOB.

I do not know how much longer I'm going to be here. At least Moora is probably getting to sleep the day away. No one has told me when she is going to be released, so I have to wait until I hear something.

There is a National Geographic-type TV show on about penguins. It is very moving. A father penguin has not eaten for four months while waiting for his mate to return. The father is still coughing up fluids to feed the young penguin chicks. Morgan Freeman is the narrator: "Hopefully, the mother will arrive soon. For some, it is, however, too late." Sad stuff. Luckily I'm not PMSing or I would probably start bawling... ;>

There is a lot of weird footage on this show of mass formations of penguins squawking away. Morgan Freeman again: "The sound is deafening, but somehow each penguin is able to hear their mate's sound." I know that I must really be sleep deprived, because this footage is more captivating than it should be. God, my head really needs some rest.

Almost 8pm... Maybe I will be able to close my eyes for a little bit. I wonder if anyone will yell at me for doing so in the hospital waiting room?

#129 - The FOB, day 1

2006-04-05T17:35:00.000-04:00

It is 6:59am, and I am huddling between a mass of people on bleachers. We are waiting (I think) to be issued our weapons, which we will be carrying around for the next 4 weeks. I say that I think that is what's happening, as the DSs here don't give out much information on what's going on. It is very frustrating. I've found out more about what to expect from the members of other platoons than the cadre. For some reason, here at AIT it seems like the DSs don't care about keeping us in the loop. Maybe it's just my company, I don't know...

We are marching to the FOB this morning. I am still surprised that this type of field exercise has been tacked onto the beginning of AIT, even before we have started our MOS classes.

I was able to call my husband the last few nights on my cell phone. What a change from basic training! We're still not sure if we are able to keep the cell phones (refer to aforementioned comment about the DSs not telling us anything), so my phone calls have been very brief.

I have been tentatively assigned to 1st platoon. We are going out to the FOB with two Drill Sergeants from our company. I'm not sure if either of them are actually going to be my platoon's DSs. One of them (DS Mitchell) seems pretty nice, but the other guy seems mean. Yesterday he was playing some major head games and trying to mess with people. I guess that I'm just tired with dealing with that kind of crap. 10 1/2 weeks of it already was enough. I guess I had hoped that AIT would be a little different. We'll see how it goes, I guess...

It is now 9:15am and we're back at our company, still waiting for the rifles to be issued. We've been up since 4:45am just to wait around... sigh. I am still pretty tired. I had about 1/2 a cup of coffee this morning at breakfast. I didn't want to drink any more, as I knew we were supposed to have some sort of road march. Of course we have no idea how long it will be, or when it is supposed to start. If I knew this, I would have had more coffee! The lack of information we receive is continually a source of frustration. At least the classes in AIT will hopefully be better. I would guess that we will be following a structured syllabus and adhering to a schedule. What I don't know yet is when the classes are due to begin...?

It is 2:39pm, and I am now out at the FOB site. Apparently our battalion has its own FOB. The march out here wasn't long, but it was a bitch. They mostly had us running (in boots). I learned that the foot I injured in BCT during the last road march has not healed, and was further aggravated by what we were doing today. The Drill Sergeants are making me go to sick call for it since they saw me limping. That is a big different from basic. I was told that I had to go! It is hurting me quite a bit.

The FOB site is actually pretty cool. It appears to be more realistic than anything we saw at basic training. It looks like all the photos I've seen of compounds in Iraq. There is a covered hangar-type area with bleachers where we have been eating MREs, loading ammo, and having classes. There are many big Army tents, large and small, new and old, as well as several small modular buildings.

The complex is surrounding by fencing and ringed with guard towers. We will be taking classes, performing lots of guard duty, and completing various missions.

It is now 5:13pm. I just found out that this FOB is only going to last for one week - until next Wednesday - instead of the 10 days we had thought it would be. Great! I didn't bring my cell phone along, and know I will miss talking to my husband, so the shorter, the better. They are also going to be bringing us in at some point for showers. That is a difference from Blue STX, where we went unshowered for 7 days in a row.

We are set up in a tent with cots and a small heater. I don't think it will quite get cold enough to crank up. The females and males are segregated, about 2-3 tents of each gender. For the first time in my Army experience, I have received some sort of benefit (other than pay) for my rank of Specialist. There is a Sgt. in my tent (a MOS-T, or someone who is reclassing from one MOS to another), and she made sure that we received placement in the tent by rank. So I am close to the door and the heater, and not cramped up like the other girls who are nearly on top of one another.

We are supposed to be having some sort of classes in tents with computers. I already have learned a little about the other 25-series MOSs and what they do. I won't be able to write a lot about my specific MOS training on this blog lest I inadvertantly give out some information that I'm not supposed to... not that I think terrorists are perusing my blog for intel or anything.

We just finished chow... A-rats, not too bad. I saved two packs of instant coffee from the MREs, for whatever guard duty I may be tasked with tonight. Hopefully I can get some other folks here to save me any instant coffee they're not drinking.

The platoon that I was assigned to at my company has been split up here at the FOB. We are all mixed together with people from the other companies in my battalion, including the MOS-Ts, who are part of Alpha Company. Most of the MOS-Ts rank from SPC to SGT, though there are a few PFCs and SSGs. The MOS-Ts are generally assigned to squad and platoon leader positions. The cadre said that we should be able to learn a lot from these folks who have already spent years in the Army. Many of them have also been deployed and have seen combat.

#128 - First few days at AIT

2006-04-04T14:17:00.000-04:00

I am now at the location of my AIT (Advanced Individual Training), Fort Gordon, Georgia. This is where I will spend the next 21 weeks learning my job of a 25B (Information Technology Specialist).

After arriving to my AIT company and checking in, I was given an overnight pass by one of my AIT Drill Sergeants. It was great to be able to spend more time with my husband, especially since I know I won't be seeing him for another month.

The first few days were a flurry of inprocessing and getting settled in at my new AIT company barracks. I didn't take many notes on the first few days, but will share a few recollections before my journal writing picks up...

I had to check in at AIT in my Class 'A' uniform. I was surprised to see someone at the company (also checking in) who looked vaguely familiar... It was the girl who I met at Reception back when I first arrived at Fort Jackson. She was the one who was also going to Fort Gordon for the same MOS as I. It was nice to see a familiar face. I had to ask her, where did she end up going to basic training?

I was blown away to discover that she had actually been in my basic training company at Fort Jackson, but in another platoon, and another bay in the barracks. I had no idea. Apparently she knew I was there, but I didn't realize that she was. I felt really bad for having forgotten who she was from Reception (it was odd that I remembered her now at AIT months afterwards).

Jeanene and I were assigned to be battle buddies. I knew I liked this girl when I met her at Reception, and was glad that we could help each other get through AIT. But I somehow felt cheated that I never got to know her at BCT. Maybe it would have been a different experience if I had another friend to help keep me sane... I don't know.

My battle buddy Jeanene in the barracks

The journal now picks up with Day 2 at AIT:

It is April 4th, and 7:06am. We were just marched to a theatre to begin our inprocessing. We marched on part of the massive Barton Field on the way here. I believe it is over 3 miles around the track... it's enormous.

< --Yes, we have to run around this entire field. You almost need binoculars to see its end in the distance...

I wanted to have some coffee this morning, but it was a rushed breakfast. I did, however, have a Krispy Kreme donut. Whoa - don't know if I can handle all that sugar!

I haven't had fire guard duty yet in the barracks, so I actually had a rare decent night of sleep in the barracks. The room, however, was hot and humid. I am the only person thus far with a working fan. Someone in my room had the cojones to point it in their direction and away from me. I put a stop to that very quickly. Fans are cheap, and they can buy their own... sheesh.

There have been a alot of formations so far, nothing exciting. From the sounds of it, we will likely still be in Phase IV for the next four weeks (this means limited privileges, and no off-post passes). I still don't know if any on-post passes will be granted either, but we will be in the field anyway for the next 10 days or 2 weeks starting on Wednesday. They are called it the FOB, which I believe stands for Forward Operating Base exercise. It sounds like it might be a lot like BCT, including fun with the M-16, and another convoy live fire exercise. I thought that kind of thing was over... I guess not. We learned that there will also be more MOS-specific training.

It is 1:55pm, and I am still in inprocessing. This is incredibly boring. I've been fighting the urge to sleep all day long. We have been stuck in a room with about 100 people, and four or five low-paid government employees talking to us at once. All of these folks are incredibly rude to us for some reason. It is torture to be stuck in here.

I did find out that my date for leaving Fort Gordon is supposed to be August 21st. I would also assume that it is also the AIT graduation day.

It is 7:56pm, and I just got off the phone with my husband. It was wonderful to hear his voice and speak to him. Today was a bit of a "sad" day for me. I knew it would be tough for the first few days at AIT after I just saw him at BCT graduation. I'm feeling very down right now, but I just keep reminding myself that it is only going to continue for the next few weeks. I cannot wait to see my husband again!

Day 3 or 4 at AIT:

It is 9:18am, and I am waiting to attend more inprocessing, which I've been doing a lot of since I got here. I'm tired, only having gotten less than 4 hours of sleep last night. I was introduced to the fun of hall guard duty. My shift consisted of two hours of cleaning. There is no sitting around writing letters during fire guard like at BCT... it is all work here, and no relaxation. The only perk is that I finally got a chance to catch up on my laundry while I was cleaning.

This morning we were abruptly woken up for a 4:15am formation... about 3 minutes before that time. We wore summer PTs (shorts and short-sleeved shirts) in about 40 degree temps while the other companies had on several more layers, hats, and gloves. Just my luck... I went from one of the hardest companies in BCT to one of the hardest companies in AIT.

I froze my ass off for about a good hour before we took a PT test. I did more pushups than ever before (far exceeding the AIT 60% standards), around what I needed to for situps, and a similar run time as the last test in basic. I was so cold that I only finally began to warm up after running the first mile.

...

It is 2:02pm, and I am at the dental clinic. What a fun day, huh? The first few days of AIT are said to always suck, as it is either inprocessing, medical visits, or sitting in briefings. The lack of sleep is really catching up with me in a bad way. I am utterly exhausted, and miserable. The surprising thing that I found is that we actually get less sleep here in AIT than in BCT. I certainly did not expect that!

After the PT test we were able to eat breakfast at the DFAC without supervision. Ah, coffee. You begin to appreciate the little things when you've been deprived of them for so long.

We were then marched a distance to another briefing about pay and finances.

After hours of fighting sleep at the briefing, we had lunch. Again, a relatively unhurried meal, which was a nice change from BCT. I even had some real food for a change. Afterwards we were issued our TA-50 items, which included another laundry bag, a pistol belt, poncho, canteen, and canteen cup and holder... pretty much the standard accessories that all AIT students have.

It is 2:20pm and I'm still waiting at the dental clinic. I am not here for any problem... it's just that anyone with potential issues needs to have an exam, so I guess they might have seen something odd on my x-rays. I am hoping that any scheduled appointment won't conflict with the upcoming FOB (this stands for Forward Operating Base, and is supposed to simulate what it's like to be stationed in an outpost in Iraq or Afghanistan). This is a 7-day field exercise that we are supposed to attend tomorrow. I can't say that I am, however, looking forward to it, especially feeling so tired right now. More on the FOB later...

Some people luck out and are able to attend a FOB at a location near their barracks (which could mean sleeping in beds, and showers). We passed by one today. There were GS tents set up, sandbags and concertina wire. A mock battle was going on, and a number of "insurgents" with towels on their heads were running around. One of the DSs was loudly mocking their strategy. I have heard that our FOB will be located on a more secluded part of base.

Someone who has already been on a FOB said that it's really what you make of it. It could be a fun week, or a miserable one. A lot of people do end up getting hurt, however, probably due to all the "hooah" crap. One thing that surprised me here at AIT is that they actually encourage you to go to sick call if something is wrong with you. That is a change from basic.

I'm hoping I will be able to hang onto my cell phone in the barracks when we return from the FOB. One of the other people in my platoon told me that the DS said that we could use them in our rooms, but only on our personal time. I don't know if this is a temporary arrangement, or if we'll be able to keep them while we're here. I'm hoping for the best. Unfortunately a frustrating thing about being here is that we haven't been giving a lot of information on what is expected of us, or what is coming up. Much of our info is gleaned from talking to other AIT students in the company.

Today I'm having something of a "down" day. I'm just not having a good one and am pretty high on the miserable scale right now. We heard another platoon talking about AIT graduation practice yesterday, and it was discouraging to know that we are only beginning our time here. There is a girl who just moved out of my room that has been here since October for 25B and is only now leaving. I guess that kind of puts the length of this AIT into perspective. The only thing that I have to look forward to is that my husband is planning to visit me as often as he can during AIT. He is tentatively planning to drive from Pennsylvania to Georgia every 2-3 weeks to visit once I begin receiving weekend passes. However, that won't happen for at least another month.

Otherwise I'm not sure how I would be able to handle being here for so long. God, I hope the next 3 or 4 weeks passes quickly. Getting over this initial hump is going to be difficult, but it can only get better, right?

I haven't had much to base my impressions upon, but I will share my impressions of AIT thus far...

There is a great variability in the types of Drill Sergeants. Some are hardasses, and some are laid back. From what I have observed, the students who are almost done with AIT seem to be pretty much left alone. In a formation yesterday, I actually saw a few people reading the newspaper and goofing around. That would never fly in basic training!

It appears that there is some degree of fraternization amongst the students. I get the sense that they probably socialize together on the weekends. This is a whole different world from BCT.

There are more details issued out than in BCT, from what I can see. Maybe they have more for people to do, since there is greater free, unstructured time.

The students further along in their AIT studies seem to be fairly relaxed and laid back. I daresay that they also don't seem to fear the Drill Sergeants anymore. Perhaps that is to be expected of folks who have been here for 20 weeks, or longer.

I guess it could be worse. Jacyln, a girl in my room, has an AIT of at least 39 weeks. She is going to be some kind of a satellite operator. God, that is nearly twice as long as my AIT.

Sometimes I do envy all of the folks in my BCT platoon who went for MOSs that had really short AITs... some of them were only 5-7 weeks long.

...

It is 3:05pm, and I'm still at the dental clinic. It sounds like I am just waiting to be scheduled for an appointment. Somehow I ended up being one of the last people stuck here, and will probably have to be marched back to the company by a Drill Sergeant. Damn! In AIT, you really do appreciate any little bit of time spent away from the DSs. I played along with the game of being subservient to the cadre in BCT, but at this point it is really getting to be tiring. Perhaps some of it has to do with the fact that I am older than most of the Drill Sergeants here. I miss the civilian world, and all things non-military, including being on an even footing with others. I can handle ceding to authority, I mean, I did sign up for this... but it does bother me sometimes that I am submitting to some folks who are less intelligent than myself. In some ways, it seems like a self-imposed insult. I just have to remind myself of the reasons I enlisted whenever it gets a little too nutty around here...

On the other hand, I can also sympathize with the frustration that the Drill Sergeants must feel being around the privates. Even though the students here at AIT are generally in "high speed" MOSs (those requiring a higher score on the ASVAB, and the assumption of a greater intelligence), a lot of them don't always exhibit the behavior that you would expect of smarter kids.

Here is an example... This morning we had to sign a form for accepting the TA-50 issued to us. The Drill Sergeant explained where he wanted to form signed in excruciating detail, and then said, "Even though I told you how to do this, I guarantee that at least one person is going to screw it up." Sure enough, someone did. It happens all the time, even with the most basic of tasks and the simplest instructions issued. I would imagine that this would be very frustrating to deal with after awhile... Yes, I actually have sympathy for the Drill Sergeants, if you can believe it!

#127 - Graduation Day

2006-03-31T17:57:00.000-05:00

I am the second person on the left of the first row (behind the flag) in this photo

This is my first post in 2 1/2 months. I am accessing the internet from a laptop in a hotel room off post...

It is over! Today was graduation day. It was a warm and sunny morning at Fort Jackson. The graduation ceremony went off without a hitch (though standing at parade rest and attention for over an hour was rather unpleasant). I will be reporting to the location of my AIT tomorrow before noon. Until then I am spending some quality time with my husband, eating good food (and chocolate!), listening to music, and relaxing. I'm not sure when I will be able to have internet access at AIT, but I will update this blog as soon as I am able to...

#126 - Family day

2006-03-30T21:37:00.000-05:00

I am very pleased to know that my husband is already in town, and waiting to see me in a few hours. Family day has been a long time coming!

Thus far today has consisted of cleaning the barracks, breakfast, and getting smoked. I already swept and mopped our room but most of the females are being lazy and not helping in any way. We received our personal bags (which were in storage), but for some reason the cadre refuse to let us wear our civilian eyeglasses. I'm hoping that my husband won't be frightened by the sight of my wearing BCGs!

...

It's been a busy day, and I haven't been able to write until now (9:26pm) as I am getting ready for bed. I had a great time with my husband today. We weren't able to leave Fort Jackson, but we spent a lot of time driving around and exploring the base.

The females are going wild right now in the barracks. Music is playing (as they've gotten their electronics back), cell phones are out, and everyone is dancing around in their hoochie mama civilian clothes. I'm shocked that one of the Drill Sergeants hasn't made an appearance by now.

I was assigned both a CQ and a fire guard shift tonight. I paid one of the girls in my bay to take both off my hands for $35. I figured it was well worth the expenditure, as I need all the sleep I can get right now.

Wakeup is at 5:00am tomorrow, which means about 4:30am for me. Right now I'm looking at a max of about 6 hours of sleep - that is, if the girls ever settle down tonight.

Luckily I already have everything packed up. My duffel has most of my uniform items, and everything else is in one of those big black Army bags. I still don't have much to carry compared to some of the girls in my platoon. It will be interesting to see how they will bring all of their belongings to AIT. I've pared down things to the bare minimum and am still having trouble carrying these.

#125 - Inspection preparations

2006-03-28T08:00:00.000-05:00

There are only two more days until family day, and I can see my husband. I am very excited!

I didn't have any time to write yesterday. We did some PT, outprocessing and graduation practice. I am in the front row of my company. Bucking is to my right on the outside. She is really nervous about her marching, but I think she'll be ok.

We got our Class 'A' uniforms back from the dry cleaners yesterday, and pinned all the buttons and medals on. We also began wearing our black berets for the first time. They aren't so bad, but I would look like less of a dork if I could get rid of these birth control glasses. Amazingly, the cadre is forcing us to wear these for graduation. I don't see why they can't allow us to wear our civilian eyeglasses or contacts. Maybe it's their last hurray as far as making us miserable or exercising control over the minutia of our lives... who knows.

It is 1:53pm, and we are preparing for our last inspection. We will have to wear our Class 'A' uniforms and stand by our lockers with all of our equipment laid out (the stuff we cleaned and turned in yesterday).

This morning we had more graduation practice to contend with, in the rain. Luckily it is supposed to be sunny on Friday with a high of 78. Hopefully we won't keel over wearing the wool jackets.

I am more than ready to get the hell out of here. One of the girls woke me up last night for a fire guard shift that I didn't have, and I nearly ripped her head off. That's the first time I've really lost my cool with anyone while I've been here. Then another girl woke me up in the middle of the night to ask if I had scissors. I was ready to kill her! Maybe it's good that I don't know anyone here with my MOS who is going to AIT. The few that I will probably keep in touch with are Jackman, Newman, and a few girls from the other platoons. Maybe Bucking too, since I spent a lot of time with her. Other than those few folks, I really don't care for just about everyone else. I've tried to, but it has been difficult... Maybe a lot of it has to do with the stressful environment here...

At the graduation ceremony, Jackman is being honored with some other soldiers from the other companies in the battalion (soldiers of the cycle, soldier leaders of the cycle, high PT scorers, and high BRM scorers). She hasn't yet told her dad, who is going to be there - it will be a surprise. Jackman's father is a Capt. in the Army, and a Ranger to boot. Between her family's military background, being PG, and receiving this award, she has a lot going on that is causing the platoon to scathe with jealousy. Actually, it doesn't take much to foster jealousy in this crowd. A few of us that will be in front of the company had to attend a special graduation practice yesterday, and were wearing our black berets before everyone else did. When we returned to the company with them on, everyone in my platoon was very upset that he had something on that was different, and raised hell until we took them off. I know that most of the people here are in the 18-22 age bracket, but 8-12 is more appropriate for their maturity level... amazing.

#124 - Back at the barracks

2006-03-26T18:51:00.000-05:00

I am on a fire guard shift with Newman. I just finished cleaning toilets... such fun! The DS came upstairs during the previous shift and tossed the contents of a locker that wasn't secure. I don't mean to be accused of schadenfreude (taking pleasure in the misfortune of others), but I'm glad it wasn't mine!

Yesterday we spent much of the day cleaning and turning in various pieces of equipment, including wet weather gear, the rucksack, pistol belt, suspenders, ammo pouches, first aid pouch, canteens and covers, PT mat, and kevlar. We then sat in a classroom cleaning our weapons while watching the movie "Jarhead". Sadly, there was a lot in the movie that I could identify with.

They had promised us a "good breakfast" after Victory Forge but the only thing different was that omelets were offered at the DFAC.

Lunch was our "pizza party" outside the company. I gave away 2/3 of my pizza and soda, but ate the two candy bars offered. Some people pigged out so much that they had to pass on supper later on.

After dinner, we sat in another classroom and watched "We Were Soldiers". Well, at least I saw about 1/2 of the movie. It was pretty good, but I was zonking out, since I'm still sleep-deprived from our week in the field, so I went upstairs. I tried to catch a nap before "toe the line" (our nightly accountability) but as usual, the females upstairs were too loud.

My fire guard shift is nearly over - thank God I can go to bed for a few hours. I really need the sleep.

...

It is 1:24pm, after lunch, and I am on weapons guard duty. One of the girls from my platoon, Manacles, was mad at me for not giving up my shift to her on demand. Tough bananas. This is my letter-writing time.

In these last few days before graduation, people are really going at one another's throats... in some cases, literally. The gloves are coming off! There is a 17-year old kid named Bouchard in my platoon that was choked by a big guy in the platoon. Poor guy. The Walmart rangers have also been up to no good, so we have lost our phone privileges today. Damn! I had wanted to call my husband to solidify our plans for family day and graduation.

It has been an uneventful Sunday here. I did laundry this morning, and spent some quality time cleaning my locker, and throwing out a lot of stuff I don't want to bring to AIT. I cleaned my boots and prepared my ACUs for family day (apparently we are wearing ACUs for family day, and Class As for graduation).

#123 - Victory Forge, epilogue

2006-03-25T09:48:00.000-05:00

It is 7:49am Saturday morning, and I am back in the barracks. We got back here about 11:30pm last night. Taking a shower was long overdue, and a wonderful experience.

The barracks reeked lastnight with the B.O. of 90-odd women who hadn't showered for a week. I was gagging. We told everyone to take a shower, even those that are normally personal hygiene-deficient.

The "rite of passage" ceremony last night was anticlimatic, especially after being forced to wait seven hours for it in the cold (30s temps - with no freaking jacket!). It was about 10 minutes long. The Lt. Col. and Sgt. Maj. talked for a minutes in front of the four companies that will be graduating. They changed our phase banners from blue to red, white and blue. We sounded off with our company mottoes, and then our 1SG gave us another uninspiring talk about how we better not screw off or he will revoke our family day and graduation day privileges.

Newman and I were made to march about a mile to the rite of passage site. We weren't very happy about it, as we are on a no-marching profile and were in a lot of pain. We did not march the rest of the distance back, but rode on the back of a four-ton truck. It was freezing, and made for a very miserable few hours. The truck did not go straight back to the company, but followed the people marching at a snail's pace. I think I would rather have suffered with pain marching with them than froze my ass off in the back of the open truck with no jacket on.

I am happy to be back at the company, and thankful that Victory Forge is over.

#122 - Victory Forge, day 7

2006-03-24T04:30:00.000-05:00

I am in line for chow and have a few minutes to write. This is the seventh and final day of Victory Forge. I am in a good mood this morning. Other than a 1 1/2 hour roving guard shift this morning, I had an uneventful CS gas-free sleep last night, and two packets of instant coffee to get me going. The weather is overcast and intermittently drizzing. I've heard that we are going to be here until this evening, though I'm not sure exactly what we'll be doing for the rest of the day.

It still doesn't feel like Victory Forge is "over" yet. I'll just be relieved once we return to the barracks.

...

It is now 10:37am. We've packed our gear up, and filled in our foxholes. I used my shoveling skills to help others out. What took me about 5 minutes has taken others a few hours. We packed away our gas masks which (hopefully!) means we won't get gassed again out here.

There have been a few girls away in med quarters for several days who just came back. Everyone knows that Penny and Manacles were just feigning illness to get out of the field. Two girls here apparently overhead them planning their deception and are going to write a statement to that effect. These are the two cute girls of the platoon, and usually employ their feminine wiles to get out of trouble. They have been pretty successful all cycle at getting other people to do their bidding, so it will be interesting to see if they get out of this one. I'm betting that nothing will really happen, and they will evade punishment once again.

Bucking just returned from med quarters too. She has a yeast infection, a sinus infection, and a double ear infection... the poor girl. Sounds like a lot of misery.

I just hit up Newman for some maximum dosage Ibuprofen, as I think I inadvertantly packed mine away. We have been trading them back and forth throughout BCT. My foot is still hurting me, and I managed to mess it up even more backfilling these foxholes.

...

It is 4:30pm, and we have been sitting around now for several hours - hurry up and wait. After lunch we policed the area for trash, and have been idle since. From the sounds of it, we will be sitting around for several more hours in the cold, probably until 8:30pm and the Victory Forge "rite of passage". After that, the company (sans me) will march back 6.5 miles to the barracks. I will ride back unceremoniously on a truck.

The level of boredom here is quite high. I have exhausted any possible interesting opportunities for conversation. Most people are sleeping, or playing hangman in the dirt with sticks. Hopefully chow will be here soon to save me from the ennui.

#121 - Victory Forge, day 6

2006-03-23T10:00:00.000-05:00

We are at MOUT training practicing our building clearing techniques. The weather is cold - in the 30s. Last night White and I had a two hour roving guard shift so I am sleep deprived this morning. I still have a supply of instant coffee packets, however, to help me through the day. Yeah, caffeine!

This is our last real day of training, and tonight will be the last night sleeping out in the field. I believe that we will not be getting much sleep tonight, as the cadre will be using up all the remaining CS gas, smoke grenades, and whatever else they have in their arsenal. Tomorrow morning we will be packing up our stuff, filling in our foxholes, and policing the area for trash. I will be missing out on the road march back, but will be able to attend the Victory Forge rite of passage ceremony - more on that later.

It is 11:18am, and we have cleared two buildings so far. I was prematurely "killed" by an insurgent. Later on the entire company is supposed to attack this complex of buildings. We might be gassed during the process. We can smell gas now, though it is not strong. Someone must be getting gassed in the area. I hate this stuff.

This training complex was built to look something like a village in a war zone. There are a number of buildings, one and two story, ranging from prefab steel buildings to wood stick-built structures which have been made to look old. Broken down and burned out shells of automobiles, military trucks, and busses litter the landscape...

#120 - Victory Forge, day 5

2006-03-22T13:12:00.000-05:00

This is the first time I've actually written from indoors this week. I am at sick call. I suspect I'll get a 3-day no running/no jumping/no marching profile and a supply of Ibuprofen for my litany of ills. A lot of people had to go to sick call this morning from Victory Forge, and the 1SG was pissed. He made each person come up to him and state their reason for wanting to go. Some people really didn't have a good reason for wanting to do so. There was a rumor that those who went to sick call would be able to stop by the barracks and get showers, so of course that inspired a few people to make the effort. Unfortunately there were no showers to be had. Since we are in day 5 without showering, people are beginning to stink. A lot of the females are also beginning to develop urinary tract infections and yeast infections. One of the other companies busses their soldiers back to the barracks periodically for showers, but not us. Charlie company always seems to do things the hard way.

The other companies are also not marching back from Victory Forge, nor did they have to wear their IBAs on the road marches. From everything I've heard, it sounds like we had it worse than any of the companies in our battalion.

Last night was supposed to be a quiet one in our perimeter. We should have known better than to believe that. For several hours we were periodically bombarded with flares, smoke bombs, and CS gas. The first time we were gassed, I struggled with putting my pro mask on, as I had a difficult time finding and adjusting the straps in the dark. Luckily the CS gas did not land close to my tent, but was a distance away, so I didn't receive the full brunt of the attack. As my skin began to burn and I inhaled the CS, I knew I had to move quickly, and finally got the damn thing on. I still had it on when we were gassed again, this time by a nearby canister. My skin was burning, but otherwise I did not incure any other discomfort with the mask on. Apparently the smoke cloud drifted over to the males' side of the perimeter, as I heard a lot of coughing, choking and sneezing coming from them.

It was frustrating having to wear the mask for a prolonged period, because we were not allowed to have eyeglass inserts in the mask, so I was blind (you cannot put the mask over eyeglasses and have a good seal). I thought I heard people walking around the woods, outside the perimeter, but I couldn't do anything about it, being "blind". So I sat helpless in my tent and waited for the gas attacks to finally end. Eventually they did, and I got a little sleep.

One of the other platoons in our company wasn't so lucky. Apparently they pissed off their DS and the 1SG by being late for a formation, so they were gassed repeatedly. Their Drill Sergeant also kept them up all night long, making them switch fighting positions (foxholes) every 30 minutes.

...

It is 10:33am, and the wheels of Army medicine have turned fairly quickly. I have already been seen at sick call. As I expected, I have my 3-day profile and Ibuprofen. Unfortunately I will not be able to make the 6-7 mile road march back on Friday, but I don't think it's mandatory. In the worst case, I will have to make up the event on the track when we get back to the company.

Just two more nights at Victory Forge... I can't wait for it to be over. I am tired, sore, dirty, smelly, and usually cold or otherwise uncomfortable. I am also weary of constantly living under the threat of being gassed or attacked.

The sad thing is that so many things out in the woods remind me of my husband, friends, and the pleasant experiences I've had outdoors in years past. I see the jerry cans storing water, and remember our camping trips in our Land Rovers. The military vehicles remind me of the ones we have at home. The DS has a small radio in his tent, and it reminded me of listening to the CBC while camping in Nova Scotia. The list goes on and on. I look forward to a day when spending time in the woods will once more be a positive experience. I miss having the lights on at night, coffee in the morning, campfires, and snuggling under the blanket with my husband. Sharing a hooch with White is a different experience...lol.

I'm still sitting at sick call, and waiting for Newman to be finished. I'm accompanying her as a battle buddy. Our DS said that today is mostly going to be a down period anyway, so we're not missing out on much.

When we were out at the Anzio range yesterday, Jackman had a little bit of a breakdown. The fact that almost everyone in our platoon hates her has finally taken its toll. I've been telling her all along not to worry about the idiots here, but I think she is finally reaching the breaking point mentally. I feel bad for the girl - she's only 18 years old, after all. She decided to go to sick call and request that she could stay in med quarters for the night, just to get away from everybody. Of course one of the females in the platoon found out, and the word has quickly spread that Jackman broke down from the mental stress of being our PG. People were already scrutinizing her for any possible fault, and now they are having a field day with this. I'm sure they are going to give her a hard time when she comes back. Perhaps she will ask the Drill Sergeant to relieve her of her PG duties... I don't know. I keep reminding her that she only has a few more days with these knuckleheads, but it's getting more difficult to console her.

We had lunch at sick call, which consisted of some nasty, heavily-processed canned food. There was a shrink-wrapped hamburger bun that probably had a shelf life of 70 years, and a 'barbeque meat product' which could have passed for wet cat food. Yummy!

I just ran into Jackman at sick call. She is going to try to stay a 2nd night at med quarters. Apparently the doctor found that her pulse and blood pressure were sky-high from her stress level, and they wanted to keep her for observation. I'm sure the platoon will be talking about her spending another night away while they are getting gassed in the field. Oh well...

I also ran into some of the other females from my platoon who went to sick call. They stopped at the barracks because someone had forgotten their military ID, and the girls ran and showered against the DS' wishes. Two of the offending parties were girls who are rumored to be hooking up at night with guys from another platoon. Perhaps after several nights in the field having sex, well, and without adequate personal hygiene, I can see why they are desperate for a shower...lol.

Sitting around is tiring in its own right, and I'm fighting drowsiness and my eyes becoming heavier with each passing minute. Most people in my platoon have been taking catnaps in their foxholes out at Blue STX. Our perimeter is spread out over a distance, so the Drill Sergeants can't be everywhere all the time.

I wish I had those packets of instant coffee with me now, as I could use the caffeine. This morning we were fed hot As in the field, and there was a large container of coffee. After the cadre had their fill, they said that anyone over the age of 30 was allowed to come up and get some coffee. I grabbed a cup of weak, gas station-like swill, and quickly gave it to someone else (under the age of 30!). I certainly miss coffee and it's been a long time since I've had it, but I am patient enough to wait for a quality coffee experience (I don't really consider the instant coffee packets I've been ingesting to count!).

#119 - Victory Forge, day 4

2006-03-21T13:38:00.000-05:00

It is the fourth day of Blue STX, so we are over the hump. It's all downhill from here!

We are at the Anzio range and just completed the vehicle convoy live fire exercise. Luckily no one was shot or seriously injured. This is the most dangerous thing we had to do at basic training, mainly because people were shooting live rounds right next to each other off the back of a moving vehicle.

Our exercise went like this... Fourteen people climbed onto the back of a 4 or 5 ton truck, seven on each side. The truck is very tall and there really isn't anything to grab onto to help you climb into it, so all of the short people like myself struggled. The truck then drove around one side of the range, where the seven people on the driver's side engaged targets. Then the truck turned the other way, and the seven people on the passenger side engaged their targets. The truck then came up a hill where a simulated IED went off. The vehicle then came to an abrupt halt, and we all had to jump off and run to our positions, where we once again fired on targets. We did this once as a dry run with blanks, and then with live ammo. The range was made to look like a bombed out urban environment, with walls, overturned cars and trucks, and debris. The most difficult part of it for me was just getting on and off the truck. One time I fell flat onto my face - no fun on a gravel surface (the Drill Sergeant laughed). Thankfully it is over. This was one of the last major training requirements we had to meet for BCT.

Tomorrow Newman and I will probably go to sick call. Yeah, I really do feel like a "sick call ranger" now. My foot is still really hurting from the road march. My knees and leg have also been causing me considerable pain. Yesterday we were marching around in deep sand, which didn't help things. The pain at one point was bad enough that I was almost crying. At least I'll probably get more 800mg Ibuprofen at sick call. Again, if this was the civilian world, it wouldn't be a big deal... I would have medicine on me, and I wouldn't have to go.

Last night our squad had to act as security at a vehicle checkpoint while we were attacked on several occasions. During the final attack, I was in the treeline visiting the forest facilities along with Bucking and Manacles (girls do go to the bathroom in groups!). We saw the enemy attacking our checkpoint in the distance, and engaged them with our blank M-16 fire from afar. As we were outside the checkpoint at the time, we missed out on the CS gas attack. Poor Jackman had the CS gas canister land right next to her, and then she had trouble putting her mask on, so she nearly puked.

The trouble about playing war with blanks is that you don't know, or can't prove, when you've "killed" the enemy. From our vantage point in the distance, the three of us easily picked off the enemy while they were attacking, as they had no idea we were out in the woods. Unfortunately the DS in charge didn't see it that way.

This morning I believe we were gassed while we were waking up. I saw a canister in the distance emitting smoke, and cluster flares lighting up the night sky. I was just about to leave my hooch to visit the forest facilities, and had to stay and quickly don my pro mask. Nothing is worse than getting gassed just as you are about to go to the bathroom. Someone also lobbed a smoke cansiter into Bucking and Jackman's hooch and nearly caught it on fire.

Last night I had roving guard duty with White. It was quite boring walking around in the dark, but at least our shift ended before the rain came. It had been raining since last night, and it is still raining now, making for a very cold, wet and miserable environment. Some rain did come into our hooch, but luckily the sleeping bags are encased in a Gore-Tex shell.

Yesterday we actually received mail, which was a surprise and a treat. I got a letter from my husband and two cards from my mom. Unfortunately we weren't allowed to send out any mail from the field.

...

It is 1:38pm, and after chow. The company is milling about in the bleachers. I'm tired of being here, and am counting down the days remaining. Earlier I engaged in a verbal altercation with one of my platoon members. They had stolen the weapon from someone who was sleeping, and were planning to torture that person by not revealing its whereabouts. The person who was plotting this had been caught sleeping several times yesterday, so a bit of hypocrisy was in order. I told them exactly what I thought, and their retort was "You know what your problem is? You want an easy ride. You always want to easy way out." Oh well. Guess I got some flack for defending one of the people who aren't popular here. BCT is difficult enough without having to deal with platoon members making it hard on their battle buddies unecessarily. I'm not thrilled with many of the folks in my platoon, but I try to support them when it is necessary. That's the only way that you can make it through this experience.

It's disappointing, in a sense, when I compare my 2006 basic training experience with the first time I went through BCT in 1997, almost 10 years ago. By this time, this late in the game, the first time I went through BCT my platoon had already bonded and become something of a family (albeit a dysfunctional one). In the present BCT cycle, this is not the case. Folks are constantly at one another's throats, and are quick to jump on someone who exhibits weakness or displays, god forbid, any shortcomings. Social graces and consideration for their comrades are in short supply. People are generally rude, and rudeness only begets more of the same. I've found that, in general, I no longer prefer the company of others, and want to be left alone. Sometimes one is able to get away from the teeming masses for a little while, but generally you're stuck with a lot of annoying, ill-temperate, inconsiderate people.

A few more days - that's just what I keep telling myself - just a few more days of this shit.

#118 - Victory Forge, day 3

2006-03-20T13:25:00.000-05:00

It is currently 11:06am, and cold and rainy. We hear that massive rains are on the way. White and I dug a large drainage trench around our hooch in anticipation, plus I excavated trenches for several folks. Word has spread of my digging abilities...lol. I am shocked at how many people (mostly females) are having trouble digging, and how many people have never been camping before BCT.

Last night my squad went on a mission to "rescue" a downed helicopter pilot. It involved hiking about 1km in the dark to a burned out shell of an old Huey. We had to fight insurgents (with M-16 blanks) and then load the pilot onto a stretcher for evacuation.

One of the platoons got gassed last night. We could hear "Gas! Gas! Gas!" in the distance, and a lot of yelling and commotion. We haven't gotten it yet, but I know it will come any time now. I wouldn't mind being out here so much if it wasn't for the constant threat of the CS gas hanging over our heads.

In the morning everyone is usually slow in getting ready. Our DS told us that if we weren't on time, that we would be gassed. I never saw people move so fast...lol.

...

It is 1:25pm, and we have finished with lunch. I am laying in my foxhole (we do that a lot at Victory Forge). No rain yet, but the weather has been overcast, cold, and windy. We are soon leaving to run a vehicle checkpoint operation. No missions planned tonight other than defending our patrol base. Luckily my platoon members have been giving me the coffee packets from their MREs, so I may have some precious caffeine to help keep me awake tonight. I will probably eat the instant coffee raw. Nasty... but you gotta go what you need to sometimes.

I am just ready to get this week of training over with!

#117 - Victory Forge, day 2

2006-03-19T17:28:00.000-05:00

It is our second day at Blue STX, aka Victory Forge. I hope the rest of the days pass quickly. Sometimes it is difficult to find free time to write while we're in the field. I am laying in my foxhole taking a break from pulling security around our perimeter. My M-16, loaded with blanks, is reading to encounter any pretend enemy.

My squad just returned from a mission. We had a run-in with a group of "insurgents" who mowed down most of my squad members from behind their position on a hill. I did not "die" during the mission. My tole is that of the RTO, or radio operator. I had to call in a report to the Drill Sergeant... "Nightstalker 7! This is Alpha Team RTO. Enemy encountered. Size: three, maybe four insurgents at twelve o'clock approximately 100m up from our position on hilltop. Activity: enemy has fired upon us and thrown grenades. Bravo Team flanking to the right and laying down suppressive fire. Unit: insurgents in ACUS with patrol cap. Time: encountered at 11:00. Equipment: enemy appears to have M-16s, grenades and artillery..." and so on.

I have to admit that sometimes this kind of training is fun. I just wish my body wasn't in pain from the road march. I have some killer blisters, including ones between my toes, my foot is very sore, and I must have pulled a hip flexor muscle. Everyone is beat up, though, not just old fogeys like me. Just about every person here has something wrong with them. Newman thinks she has a stress fracture. Bucking has a urinary tract infection, mad blisters, and likely bronchitis. Jackman's foot is killing her. One of my buddies from another platoon couldn't make the road march and has been limping around out here in the woods on crutches. This training can be physically tough on a lot of people.

The one whiny girl in my platoon was asking me earlier for some ibruprofen. Some of the folks here are mooches, and she is notorious for it. I am greedily hoarding my dwindling supply of drugs for the rest of the week. The road march on Friday night is 1/2 as long as the way here, but I want to be sure that I can make it. Sadly, I am in a lot of pain right now, and my foot has not been getting any better.

Last night I had fire guard, er, roving guard duty. I was on from midnight to 1am with White. I hate walking around the woods in the pitch dark. White was nearly knocking over people's tents... lol. Actually things have been going well with her, and we've been getting along ok.

Ugh... I just evicted a brown recluse spider from my foxhole. I also found one in White's sleeping bag while I was moving things around in the tent. These are nasty little buggers. Someone had a brown recluse bite at sick call recently, and it looked like a gunshot wound!

...

It is 5:28pm, and I have a few minutes to write. We are eating dinner, some nasty hot As. I spent most of the afternoon helping other people in my platoon to dig their foxholes. I am exhausted! I'm going to ask people in my platoon to save me the instant coffee from their MREs. I might need it to get through the next 5 days here... Wow... I just can't believe how exhausted I am. Just a few more days, I keep telling myself - just a few more days of training, and all the hard stuff will be over. Friday night when we return to the company cannot come fast enough...

Most of the platoon is ready to kill Jackman by now. They've been screwing around out here in the field, and she isn't putting up with their bullshit. It's getting to be ugly. She is expecting a mutiny soon. A few of the saner folks in the platoon are coming to her defense, but mostly everyone is against her at this point. The irony is that she is the best PG they've had, and they don't even realize it.

#116 - Victory Forge - day 1

2006-03-18T18:16:00.000-05:00

I am out at Victory Forge, and have successfully completed the 11.5 mile road march (yup, they decided that 10 miles wasn't far enough for us). The road march sucked, plain and simple. I kept up pretty well until we hit a stretch of hills and deep sand. Hiking in deep sand for about two miles was about as fun as it sounds. It had to fall to the back of the formation for awhile, but I finished ok.

We just had MREs for lunch. This was the only time I've actually eaten most of its contents, as I was ravenous after that road march.

We unfortunately had our battle buddies out here chosen for us by the Drill Sergeants, so I was not able to share a hooch with Newman. I am back again with my assigned battle buddy, White. It think it will be ok, as we're only here for a week... right?

We are about to dig our hasty fighting positions (foxholes). Guess I'm going to burn off some of the calories from the MRE!

I just finished digging my fighting position, as well as a hole to hide my duffel bag and rucksack in. Unfortunately we only had these e-tools to use, and no real shovels were available. Darn! As an archaeologist, that would have been my opportunity to shine. If it's one thing I can do well, it's digging holes... if only I am afforded the right tools for the job. Nevertheless, I seem to have surprised some folks at my ability to dig, even with the crappy e-tool.

I'm not sure what the rest of the day holds, other than chow and putting up our hooches. Tonight our DS has threatened to keep us up, maybe all night. We may be attacking other platoons. Last night the moon was nearly full, so hopefully we won't trip and kill ourselves in the dark.

Of course everyone is waiting for us to be gassed. I've heard that it can happen at inopportune times like during chow, and when you are sleeping. I can't say that I am looking forward to that.

At least digging in the sand was relatively easy. The only issue is just trying to avoid the ever-present fire ant. I forgot how much I really dislike fire ants.

...

It is 6:16pm and we just finished eating chow. We had a good scare while eating. I saw the 1SG walk up with an evil smile on his face and throw a canister right at me. Smoke started to come out of it. Shit! I immediately put my plate of food down, took off my kevlar and glasses, and put on my gas mask. I tightened the straps, and cleared and sealed it. The canister turned out to be a smoke bomb instead of CS gas. That didn't prevent most people from screaming and running, however. Even though I misidentified the canister type, I was still happy that I remained calm. After we received the "all clear" message and resumed eating, I realized that my hands were shaking. So much for being cool, calm and collected, huh?

#115 - Preparing for Blue STX

2006-03-17T02:22:00.000-05:00

Last night I was able to call my husband. I miss him terribly, even moreso that I got to talk to him. It was nice to hear his voice and know that I am going to be able to see him in only 2 weeks. This experience is nearly over!

We are scheduled to have MOUT training today, and tomorrow morning will be stepping out for Victory Forge. The week is going to suck, but at least we are near the end.

My battle buddy for Victory Forge is going to be Newman. I think White was disappointed that I didn't choose to share a hooch with her. I didn't mind sharing one with Jackman for White STX, but her buddy, Highe, drove me crazy with her constant whining and complaining. I can deal with Newman just fine. Actually she is one of the few people (besides Jackman) that I like in our platoon. It will be nice to be back in a 2-person hooch, too, for practical reasons. Though the three-person setup was very spacious, a two-person hooch affords better protection from the elements. And from what I heard, it may rain on Monday and Tuesday of next week...

I wanted to call my husband earlier, but the Drill Sergeant on CQ duty cut into our alloted personal time. Apparently he was bored and decided to stage a version of American Idol that he called "Military Idol". He made two people from each platoon get up and sing in front of the entire company, some of them against their will. A few folks were good, but most of them were terrible. Our course our platoon had its own version of William Hung as one guy pitifully try to sing like Eminem. This guy is always picked on by the DSs, but he mostly brings it upon himself. Yesterday in the DFAC he had the cojones to tell a DS that he thought he could beat him in unarmed military combat. The DS punished him by making him do pushups, but then devised a more creative form of punishment. While we marched back from the DFAC to the company, this guy had to continually run around and circle the platoon, his M-16 held high above his head, screaming, "I am the unarmed hand-to-hand combat champion!" over and over. Of course trying to run around a large moving group of 50-odd people is hard enough, so we expected him to trip and fall (he's not very coordinated), but he surprisingly made it back unscathed.

I am now working a late-night fire guard shift. These middle-of-the-night ones are the worst. Fire guard, however, is preferable to CQ or staff duty, both of which have two hour shifts. I haven't yet been assigned to staff duty in BCT, which involves having to work at the battalion HQs across the street.

...

It is now 11:33am, and we are in the midst of packing and preparing for Victory Forge. In my duffle bag I'm bringing a sleeping bag, extra pair of boots, field jacket, two sets of polypro underwear, a PT cap, camoflague pile cap, black gloves w/liners, tent poles and string, tent stakes, an extra set of ACUs, and seven day supply of socks and underwear.

On our body (besides the uniform) we will have the kevlar, LCE/LBE (load carrying equipment/load bearing equipment) pistol belt and suspenders, two 1-quart canteens, the protective mask (uncomfortably hanging from the side of your leg), crap hanging from the LCE, and we will be carrying our M-16s. On our backs in the ruck sack are a poncho, wet weather top and bottom, entrenching tool and case (a heavy sucker), PT mat (for sleeping on), two quart canteen (also heavy), t-shirts, socks, underwear, a washcloth, towel, and personal hygiene kit. Actually I cheated a little and threw some of the personal hygiene items in the duffel bag (which will ride in a truck) like cough syrup, baby wipes, and sunscreen. No need to lug that junk on my person for the road march. A lot of people push the cheating a little further and do things to cut weight like emptying their two quart canteen, leaving the E-tool out of the case, and only putting a few light clothes in the ruck to make it look like it is packed... but they are courting disaster if the DS decides to check them out, which is always possible.

The weather tomorrow is supposed to be cold again, I believe in the 30s. Someone claimed that we were going to get a snowstorm, but I think that is highly unlikely, especially since the temps have been rising to the 70s or 80s in the afternoon.

Everyone is still packing, but I already have most of my stuff ready, so I have a little bit of free time. I don't anticipate having much of it (nor sleep) at Victory Forge. Oh well. The way I see it is that we now have 1 week and 6 days until graduation. No matter how crappy it will get, I can find solace in the fact that this is truly almost over. Soon I will be able to see my husband, and return to a saner existence with phone calls and other such "privileges". I believe that just being able to talk to my husband every day when I'm at AIT is going to make a big difference.

#114 - Sick call ranger

2006-03-16T14:43:00.000-05:00

"Sick call ranger, where ya been? Gone to sick call, and back again..."

Yeah, I feel like a bit of a sick call ranger, as I have one again returned to battalion aid. Nothing is really wrong with me; I just need a refill for my allergy medicine. At this point I'm having difficulty distinguishing between the symptoms caused by the allergies and the prolonged series of colds I've been fighting off since January 17th. I cannot remember a period in my life where I have been sick and miserable for so long a time. It sucks. I'm hoping that AIT won't be like this.

I was cut short on my writing yesterday. After we were smoked in the sand pit, the platoons worked on practicing drill and ceremony (D&C), We then had a competition in front of the 1SG and CSM. My platoon came in second place. Actually I was relieved in a way that we weren't #1, as we would have then had to go to a battalion competiton - too much scrutiny!

I found out that I will likely be in front of the company during marching at graduation, as they put shorter people in the front. I'm not looking forward to it... being so visible. At least my husband will be able to see me when he comes for the ceremony, I suppose.

Yesterday we finally transitioned to Blue Phase. Those of us who passed our PT test are now allowed to eat bad things, including the candy in our MREs. Of course people are pigging out on cookies and pie at the DFAC, but I'm trying to be relatively conservative. I know I lost weight here, I don't want to gain all of it back and then some. I would like to treat myself to some good chocolate and Ben & Jerry's ice cream, however... maybe on family day. I've been craving weird kinds of foods, like Boston Market fare. It will be nice to sit with my husband and slowly enjoy a meal, not feel like I have only a few minutes to cram it into my mouth a la "eat now and taste it later".

Today we are scheduled to go to the Shoppette. I will try to purchase a watch with an alarm. Unfortunately I've been unable to rely upon the fire guards here to wake me at a specified time. I need a few other items for the upcoming Victory Forge too - things like handi wipes, cough drops, and tissues.

I am still sitting at sick call at the battalion aid building. I can hear the birds singing outside. Some of the trees are beginning to show buds of new growth. I believe that spring may be here. The pine trees have always had their needles, of course, but the deciduous hardwoods have been bare until now. I have heard that temps are mostly going to be in the 70s this upcoming week (such news is disseminated on what the DSs call the PNN - Private News Network. We are cut off from the rest of the world, so if anyone is lucky to catch a fleeting glimpse of a newspaper, or something on TV while they are in someone's office, they will share the info with everyone).

We do spend most of our time outdoors - so much that I've been sunburned on my face for awhile. My face is black and blue again from being smacked with the M-16 at the Omaha Beach range. It's a good thing they are giving us a few days to recover after Victory Forge, as my body will need the time to become more presentable before I see my husband and venture out in public.

There is supposed to be a person coming today to take down our info for hometown newspaper releases. You know, those little blurbs that say, "Pvt. so-and-so has completed basic combat training..." Graduation is definately on everyone's minds. We are scheduled to have a pizza party on the day after we return from Victory Forge. We have also been promised some sort of a good breakfast and lunch that day.

For family day, there is a dinner buffet being offered to soldiers and their families, which I will likely opt out of. I would rather spend that time dining alone with my husband. There are several folks here that I've gotten close to while I've been at BCT, but I think we all need our space... and there are certainly many that, even though this might sound mean, I wouldn't care if I never saw again.

Folks were making phone calls last night, but I didn't get a chance to. Jackman told me that we should be able to use the phone again today. Aside from the time we will be at Victory Forge, for the rest of BCT I should be able to, in theory, use the phone any time. No internet computers, though. I think the cadre were just teasing us. It sounds like they haven't been networked yet. Where's a good 25B when you need one?

Yesterday I was disappointed to have received no mail, which is unusual for me. Sometimes there is a glitch in the system, as no one will receive any mail. We suspect that one of the DSs just forgot to go to battalion to pick up the company's mail...

Last night in the barracks I overheard a conversation between two of the resident lesbians. They were being quite graphic in describing sex acts, and I think they drove a few folks out of the room...lol. Some of the females here are having a little fun with the whole drama of the lesbian finger-pointing going on in the bay (the whole "Rainbow List" incident). About seven of them formed a lesbian sisters "sorority" and performed an animated skit in front of the other girls in the barracks. One girl would say, "I'm sister licks-a-lot" and then make appropriate gestures. Another girl was simulating, well, certain sex acts. It was quite the spectacle, but very entertaining. If guys ever wonder how large groups of females behave amongst themselves, sometimes they go a little crazy. Some on the antics reminded me of things that went on in the dorm in college.

I am still sitting in sick call. I've been here for over 1 1/2 hours and haven't been dealt with yet. The person next to me is sleeping, but I'm not so brave nor brazen, even though I am tired. I wish there was a way I could somehow catch up on sleep before Victory Forge.

...

It is 2:46pm, and we just finished at the Shoppette. I didn't spend as much as I thought I would. My purchases included a Timex indiglo sports watch ($30), a few postcards, and other small items. I'm interested to see what the main PX here on post has to offer. From what I've been hearing, the only places that civilians can really eat on post are at food court of the main PX. Unfortunately we are unable to leave Fort Jackson on family day.

One of the girls in my platoon, Kobe, just went into the barber shop and had her head shaved. It's not quite Sinead O'Connor, but not far off. I'll bet she is going to be in for some interesting comments when the Drill Sergeants see her.

#113 - PT test

2006-03-15T19:15:00.000-05:00

I am currently writing from my "office" in relative quiet (one of the bathroom stalls). We just returned from chow, and earlier finished the PT test. I am happy to report that I passed everything, and am good to go! I did fewer situps than last time, but more pushups, and chopped 10 seconds off my run time. The run sucked (as usual), but I tried to push myself, and just kept thinking of my husband the entire time. Any time I wanted to stop, I reminded myself that I needed to do this so I could graduate and see him. Anyway, I'm glad that this is over, and the pressure is off.

There were a number of people in my platoon who did not pass their PT test, including White, Bucking, and Newman. I feel for them. They will try again on Friday, and if they still can't pass, they will be tested every day or two between now and graduation. No one wants to be a holdover here for failing a PT test.

Have to run - we are conducting barracks maintenance and MOUT training.

...

It is 7:00pm, and I am very tired. We practiced for the upcoming firing from a moving vehicle exercise, aka the convoy live fire. One of the Drill Sergeants decided to smoke the entire company because a few people were talking when they weren't supposed to be. It was very unpleasant. There was a giant sand pit about 100-150m long, and we had to high crawl through it, then crawl on our backs across it, and back again doing the low crawl. Sand was everywhere, including the inside of my ears.

#112 - Red Phase in Blue Phase continues

2006-03-14T19:47:00.000-05:00

Today is the 49th day of BCT, and the 57th day I've been at Fort Jackson... wow.

I am once again serving on a weapons guard detail while the rest of the company gathers downstairs for the nightly "hydration formation".

We are still in Red Phase with the banners furled. Rumor has it that we may progress to Blue Phase if people do well on the PT test tomorrow morning. I certainly hope that this is the case, as it would be nice to be able to call my husband and family before we leave for Victory Forge (aka Blue STX). We are marching out on Saturday, March 18th, and I believe we're coming back to the company on Friday, March 24th. From the 25th to family day on the 30th, we will have 1 or 2 inspections, marching, practice for graduation, the cleaning and returning of equipment, as well as outprocessing. I'm not sure what else we are doing for the rest of this week. We have an upcoming inspection, during which we will don our Class As, and more MOUT training, as well as prep for Victory Forge. I'm not very intimidate by the upcoming ten mile road march. The one we did last week was somewhere around 8 miles, and this time we will not be wearing the IBA. We will be marching in the morning, and one the way back from Victory Forge, we will be covering a shorter route (6 or 7 miles) at night. I'm not sure who will be my battle buddy yet for Victory Forge.

#111 - US Weapons, cont.

2006-03-14T13:18:00.000-05:00

It is the afternoon, and I am finally getting a chance to write. We are at the Kasserine Pass range firing various weapons as part 2 of the US Weapons training. I have been working on ammo detail all day. This morning I packed bandoliers of machine gun ammo, and have been passing it out all day. I have now been relieved and am free to sit in the another area "guarding" the detail's weapons.

The weather is warm, probably in the low 70s and sunny, though we had some rain earlier. I am glad to be set back a bit from the range in the shade, and free of wearing earplugs. Earplugs are fine for short periods of time, but I've found that several hours of wearing them usually causes a headache.

Since she was selected to be the Soldier Leader of the Cycle, Jackman was picked by the cadre to shoot the rounds from the grenade launcher (the others are just shooting dummy rounds). These real rounds are reported to cost about $1,500 a pop, so it's something that everyone cannot do. Of course everyone is jealous and is bitching about the decision. Hearing folks complain about Jackman all the time is a bit tiring. She's taking it better than I probably would under the same circumstances. She does know that AIT is coming up soon, and she won't have to deal with these people any longer.

Today we rode out to the range on the back of a Ford 750. They call it the four ton, but I'm not sure if it's really that big. The back tires are doubled up on each side, but otherwise it doesn't look very beefy. The cargo area (where we ride, like cattle) reminds me of one of our old ex-military Land Rovers at home. The DSs enjoy driving maniacally when soldiers have the misfortune of riding in the back. One of them hit a bump so hard the other day that the tailgate flew off (luckily no one was driving behind us).

Surprisingly, a lot of things here tend to remind me of home. The fence around the ammo point isn't that different from the one enclosing the yard on our property. If I look hard enough and use my imagination, I can almost picture my dogs running around, and several doggie mouths protruding through holes in the fence trying to bite at the green grass growing on the other side of the fence. I miss my pets terribly.

At home my husband is thinking about constructing a wine cellar in our basement. I was recently discussing the merits of wine drinking with one of my (older) friends here in BCT. She was having trouble the other day pulling out the pin of a grenade, and one of the Drill Sergeants told her, "Just imagine you are uncorking a bottle of wine!". ;>

Recently I've written a bit about the guys who got all of us in trouble here for sneaking off to Walmart to purchase (and sell) contraband items to their fellow soldiers in BCT. Apparently they were also dealing in cell phones as well for resale. Such profiteers! The others in the barracks were so angry that they got everyone in trouble that the offenders were moved out of their room. Their lockers were shuffled down the hallway, and the troublemakers put into their own room as the unofficial ostracized "5th platoon". While everyone got the chance to fire some neat weapons today, these guys were punished by having to fill sandbags in the hot sun.

#110 - Buddy, cover me!

2006-03-13T12:50:00.000-05:00

I am out at the Omaha Beach rifle range. This is a course with burned-out carcasses of cars (including an old Willys Jeep), concrete walls and various obstacles. One must run from obstacle to obstacle (cover) while hitting targets with the M-16 (your buddy does the same on the other lane next to you). Since I am working on an ammo detail, I did not pair up with my regular assigned battle butty, Pvt. White. I was yelled at by the Drill Sergeants for not throwing my grenade far enough at the end of the course, but that was to be expected.

I believe this is a relatively new range - at least in its present configuration. The soldiers who came back from Iraq and Afghanistan apparently were consulted in an effort to make the course appear like an urban environment. We had to don the IBAs to run the course. I was beginning to forget how unpleasant wearing one could be. It was particularly bad since it was about 85 degrees today, which is a lot hotter than it has been lately. Still, I'm not complaining too much, as I know Fort Jackson can be much hotter in the summer.

I suspect that this may have originally been a regular rifle range. There is an interesting historic range tower still standing which appears to predate the other structures on site. It looks to be currently unused, and still has a layer of 1960s-style bluish-aqua paint on the interior. The deck-on-hip metal roof is reminscent of several of the fire towers I've done research while working for the Forest Service in the past. I've noticed several similar old towers here at the various ranges on post. Oh well... I'm an archaeologist, historian, and architectural historian wannabe... I notice these kinds of things wherever I go... even in the Army at basic training.

Unfortunately this makes me miss my job as an archaeologist. Sometimes I feel like I'm missing out on so much in the civilian world by being here...

...

It is now the afternoon, and working on the ammo detail has made for a boring day. We've been sorting spent magazines on a tabletop floored with wire hardware cloth... which looks quite like an archaeology screen. Yet another reminder... I miss my civilian career.

...

It is now early evening, and I am waiting with Bucking to use the payphone. Apparently she is having a problem with her bank at home, so the DSs have granted her permission to make the call. Unfortunately I am not planning to use the phone, as tempting as it may be, since I haven't been given permission.

We are hoping that if our company is on their best behavior that we may be able to progress to Blue Phase soon. My prediction is that the cadre will likely hold out on changing the phase banner until at least after the PT test on Wednesday.

I am to be on a different detail tomorrow at another range. We will be firing various weapons including a shoulder-mounted grenade launcher and the squad-automatic weapon, basically a machine-gun version of the M-16.

At mail call today, I received a letter from a friend, a postcard from one of my website moderators, two cards from my mom, and a card from my aunt. It was a good mail day.

Just a few more days, and we'll be marching out to Victory Forge. A week out in the field will suck, but basic training is almost over... thank God!

Today I was told by a Sgt to put up my hair, as it was too close to the top of my collar. I was elated! My hair is finally growing back, and is short enough (barely) to put into a ponytail. I had chopped most of it off for BCT and have vacillated back and forth between being sorry for the decision, and thankful that I haven't had to do much to maintain it. My hair was dyed with blonde highlights before I left for basic in December. I was told that the Army didn't like multi-color hair, so I had to re-dye it my natural dirty blonde before I shipped for Fort Jackson in January. The irony is that we've been spending so much time out in the sun, that my hair has been sun-dyed to a very bright blonde color again.

#109 - Shakers and the Rainbow List

2006-03-12T17:12:00.000-05:00

It looks like today may be a day of writing opportunity. Right now I'm in the laundry room, and this afternoon I have weapons guard duty for two hours. I haven't been usually doing laundry here, as money is automatically deducted from our paychecks for a mandatory laundry service on Fort Jackson. However, the laundry service lost the clothes of about a dozen people on Friday, myself included. It remains to be seen if the lost articles will turn up, or if they will have to replace my items. In the meantime, Jackman allowed me to throw in some of my laundry with hers.

Sundays usually start with a 6:30am wakeup, and 6:50am formation for chow. The entire company is marched to the DFAC en masse. I understood today why we were cast back into Red Phase when I was watching another platoon in our company. While in formation, their platoon members were loudly arguing amongst themselves, and cursing up a storm (especially this one big guy with gold teeth who is a constant rabblerouser). This happened in front of one of the other companies in our battalion who are in Blue Phase. It was very embarrassing. From what I have heard, my company is the laughingstock of the battalion, and the bad example that the other companies' DSs threaten their soldiers with, i.e. "Watch our or you'll be back in Red Phase like them!" I'm still pissed about losing out on our phone (and possibly internet) privileges. Yesterday I caught a glimpse of those three internet stations, and I felt sick to my stomach. I'd give a lot to be able to dash off a quick e-mail to my husband or my family right now.

I will probably try to chat with Jackman for a bit when she gets back from church. It's actually nice to talk to someone whom I do not have to explain everything to. An example... This morning someone asked me which church service I was going to. I jokingly answered that I was a Shaker. The person gave me a blank stare. I said, "You know, the Shaker religion... the group famous for their Shaker furniture? It is a religion whose members supported the church by engaging in craft and furniture-making, and ran something of a self-sufficient utopian community. The Shakers would not allow marriage nor sexual intercourse between members. The religion nearly died out once the numbers dropped off. The Shakers received their name from the feverish state of trembling they would fall into while in a religious fervor." I received another blank stare, then "You must be making this shit up!" *sigh* Jackman was the only one who knew what I was talking about. I find myself unable to usually carry out any conversations that don't revolve around the mundane aspects of basic training. Forget history, politics, world events, religion, the arts, culture... all off-limits. It is quite frustrating.

...

It is now 1:24pm, and I just returned from lunch to be a weapons guard for two hours. I don't mind, as I would rather do this than some kind of detail outside in the company area. It is hot this afternoon - in the 80s - and uncomfortable wearing the ACUs. One of the differences between the ACUs and BDUs is that the ACU sleeve is not designed to be rolled up - no Swiss tabs.

The shit continues to hit the proverbial fan here. I heard that one of the church services is being segregated by sex because of some specific incidents. Not only were people using church as a venue to hook up with the opposite sex, they were actually... umm... engaging in such activities on the premises. I can't go into details on this blog, but let's just say that what went on in church was not G-rated. People have no shame.

A few individuals have been ratting out the resident lesbians in the barracks. I don't know what happened to "don't ask, don't tell". I guess if someone tells the DSs, then they have to do something. Personally I have never seen any homosexual acts with my own eyes, but there have always been rumors. Most of the lesbians who have been outed are not as upset at the fact that the DSs know, but that suspicious abound that they were hooking up with other undesirable lesbians, i.e. "Smith? I would never get with that nasty ho!". Apparently someone also said that there was some giant sex party in the female barracks. I'll bet that rumor originated with one of the males, as they are always the ones interested in hearing tales of lesbian activity in the barracks, whether the tales are true, false or just rumors. Most of the girls here don't really care, one way or another.

There is currently a lot of drama here. Some of the girls who were targeted as being homosexual are on a rampage. They are threatening to beat up the author of a so-called "Rainbow List" that was anonymously turned into the Drill Sergeants. One of them actually asked if it was me... as if I would care who was gay and who wasn't! People are going nuts around here. Graduation can't come fast enough. I can't wait to get out of this madhouse... these people are driving me crazy.

#108 - No more black berets

2006-03-11T19:29:00.000-05:00

We are still in Red Phase. I suspect that the cadre will devise some details to keep us busy tomorrow so we cannot enjoy our normal Sunday free time. At least I will still have part of the morning to myself when the churchgoers go about their business (BTW they now keep the church services segragated by gender because so many people were going there to hook up since the Drill Sergeants weren't around!). The DSs made us turn in our black berets yesterday until graduation lest anyone again try to impersonate an AIT student on their way to Walmart or the PX. I'm surprised they didn't do that in the beginning, and remove the temptation! The rumor mill maintains that the people who were selling cigarettes and candy will probably get a "field grade" Article 15 punishment, will have to forfeit 2/3 of their monthly pay, and will have extra duty until graduation. They are lucky that they are still being allowed to graduate.

Today selections were made for the "soldier of the cycle" and "soldier leader of the cycle". Each platoon's Drill Sergeants nominated two people from their platoon to go before a board. Hints were dropped awhile ago that I might be chosen, but luckily I escaped unscathed because there were two better candidates, Jackman and the APG, a guy named Burt. The board selected a girl from another platoon as the soldier of the cycle, and Jackman won the soldier leader of the cycle award. I'm glad that she got it, as it's a nice way to start her military career. She has been the best platoon guide that we've had so far, myself included! One of the DSs remarked that she marches the platoon and calls cadence better than many of the people he knows from the NCO Academy. The funny thing is that the former PG, Kobe, was plotting to try to have Jackman removed as our PG so that she could try to reclaim her former position (the irony was that Kobe was a terrible PG). Hehe... I don't think it will happen now, as all the DSs and the 1SG selected Jackman as the best one here. Good for her. I don't know if the people in the platoon will stop being assholes to her, but at least she can see that it is possible to succeed in spite of the idiots around her.

My success on the last PT test is getting me out of having to participate in PT (and a dreaded AGR run) on Monday. Instead I am joining the others who passed their diagnostic PT test in a range detail - likely loading ammo, carrying around ammo boxes, passing out hearing protection, etc. Hopefully it will get me out of buddying up with White in what we have to do on Monday. It is a dangerous exercise, and people have gotten shot in the past. We will be on a range where each member of a battle buddy team has to run from obstacle to obstacle with a loaded rifle, stopping to shoot targets along the way, while their buddy covers them (you just pray that someone doesn't turn their M-16 too far in your direction). At the end of the course, you must toss a grenade into a simulated house window, and then run up to shoot the pretend occupants. I am crossing my fingers that I get a decent battle buddy on this one. Earlier today one of the mouth breathers in my platoon was talking about how the Army let him enlist despite his ASVAB score of 24. Things like this frighten me, with good reason.

#107 - The punishment continues

2006-03-11T17:28:00.000-05:00

Not much time to write today. Yesterday was a day of hell - being smoked all day long, and treated like shit by the cadre. Some people think that the DSs are being cruel and having fun with this. We are being punished more severely than ever before, even worse than our treatment during the first week of basic training. Our lockers were "inspected" (all contents thrown out across the room) for two days in a row. The Drill Sergeants emptied all the garbage cans all over the barracks, stomped on our berets and clothes, tossed the beds, and even mixed together our dirty laundry from the laundry bags. I don't anticipate it getting better anytime soon. It is frustrating to put up with this crap because of the actions of a few idiots. This is the time when we were supposed to be enjoying Blue Phase before graduation, the time when we should have been getting respect from the Drill Sergeants for everything that we have achieved.

To add insult to injury, we found out that there is another perk of Blue Phase we will miss out on - internet access! Apparently the cadre had been in the process of trying to set up some computers in one of the platoon classrooms for e-mail. It's bad that we can't use them, but maybe a good sign for those shipping to BCT in the future... maybe they will have access to the internet as a perk to look forward to.

#106 - Change to Blue Phase, er, Red Phase?

2006-03-10T19:54:00.000-05:00

The shit finally hit the fan here. The First Sergeant found out about people sneaking out of the barracks to buy cigarettes and candy. The entreprenerial souls were selling them at a big profit to their fellow soldiers, and now we've all gotten in trouble for the transgressions of a few. We were supposed to transition to Blue Phase, which is the last part of basic training. That would have brought fewer restrictions and more privileges, such as the possibility of phone calls every night.

The mood here is not pleasant. We started our day with a PT session, and then were smoked for an extra hour. Fistfights broke out, and the perpetrators were forced to come to the front to confess to the 1SG. I still think that there may be blanket parties in the future for some folks. None of the offenders were in my platoon, but we are all still being punished, nevertheless. The 1SG is threatening to revoke our family day privileges, though I doubt that would happen (I can't even imagine the ruckus that all the visiting parents, siblings and significant others would cause). I have heard of this type of punishment being meted out on an individual basis, however, if the infraction was severe enough.

#105 - Grenades and troublemakers

2006-03-09T19:21:00.000-05:00

<-- Grenade training

It is 3:17pm, and I am currently out at the Remagen hand grenade range. I threw two live fragmentation hand grenades this morning. It was not as bad as I expected. In all of our practicing, we had to throw the grenades a considerable distance, but for the actual "real" grenades, we didn't have to throw them very far - just over the wall. The wall was part of a pretty considerable bunker, and one of the cadre told me that it was thick enough that a grenade did not have to be throw, just lobbed over the side. Of course the grenades made a very loud explosion, and the ground rocked. I was the first to go, and happy to have gotten it over with.

This morning we had another AGR (ability group run). It was awful. They had us wearing shorts, sweatpants, short-sleeved shirts, long-sleeved shirts, and sweatshirts over them. It was not cold out, so we were quickly drenched in sweat and overheating. A different DS was leading the 'C' group run who isn't used to running with the slow pokes, and he could not maintain a slow enough pace.

Therefore, most of the people fell out of the run because they just couldn't keep up with him. I had trouble too. We all ended up getting screamed at by the First Sergeant, and as punishment, were made to repeatedly sprint down the road. The 1SG also said that he is going to recommend to the company commander that we not be allowed to transition to Blue Phase because we are a bunch of "fat bodies". Most people are still beat up in some way from the road march on Monday, and we are all tired.

This afternoon we turned in our IBAs. The 1SG said that we are getting more in tomorrow, but I suspect that it is an empty threat. We have heard that the IBAs are needed elsewhere, and we think this is the last of them we'll see at BCT. The cadre here often say things that aren't true to psyche people out. It is just a part of the game, I suppose. This is basic training, after all.

My back was killing me today from wearing the IBA. Luckily I still have a (dwindling) supply of Ibuprofen. Hopefully it will tide me over for the duration of BCT.

All of the platoon phase banners are rolled up right now. One of the platoon's flags has a pack of Newports tied to it. Someone in the barracks snitched on a girl for smoking in the latrine. Cigarettes have been selling on the BCT black market here for between $10 and $20 per cigarette. I've been told that they are obtained in two ways - folks buy them from AIT students on post (usually when they see them at sick call, as this is one of the few times away from the Drill Sergeants), and also that some of the males have been sneaking out of the barracks on Sundays to the nearby PX. I've heard that people usually smoke in the shower to avoid detection. They will turn all the showers on to steam up the bathroom and disguise the smoke, then open the windows, and spray bathroom cleaning products to cover the smell.

The shit did hit the fan, though, as we had a surprise locker inspection. Luckily this never poses a problem for me, as I have nothing to hide.

#104 - White STX

2006-03-08T22:48:00.000-05:00

Despite the best of intentions, this is the first I've been able to write at all for three days - unprecedented for me in BCT! White STX has kept me far too busy, and we did not receive any personal time (barely any time for personal hygiene either, and that took place in the dark). I am back at sick call again for my blisters. The 7 mile road march on Monday morning was quite unpleasant, and my feet have paid for it. I have to get relief for these blisters as they look like they are on their way to becoming infected.

We started out on the road march about 5:00am, and took around 2 hrs and 45 minutes to finish, with two short rest breaks along the way. Before we began, two of the females in my platoon (Manacles and Penny) were complaining about having a difficult time carrying all their gear in addition to wearing the IBA flak jacket. Manacles started to cry, and told the Drill Sergeant that she struggles even carrying her gear up the stairs in the barracks. He relented and told both she and Penny that they could leave behind either their IBA or their rucksack. By halfway through the road march, about 1/3 to 1/2 of the females in my platoon had also complained and were allowed to put their rucksacks in the truck following us. Incidents like this lead me to believe that today's BCT has changed considerably compared to my first experience nearly a decade ago. Earlier in the march, I was keeping up ok, but about halfway through, the company commander decided to quicken the pace. I fell to the back of the platoon, but I did make it... with all my gear.

Along the way we passed an interesting little historic cemetery. From what I was able to see, a lot of the headstones dated from the early to mid 19th century. It made me wonder what other types of archaeological sites were in the area on post. I had my answer over the next few days as our training took us throughout the vicinity. There was a small fenced-off cemetery within our "patrol base" where we bivouaced for White STX. There were no longer any headstones remaining, but from what I was able to see, it was likely a small family plot of 6-7 individuals. I also saw a few stone rows across the road which were likely created during field clearing activities. These walls were covered with at least a foot of sand and vegetation, but I could still discern what was underneath. From what I was able to tell, it looked like there was probably a small settlement in the area dating from the early to late 19th century (and predating the formation of Fort Jackson ca. 1917). Anyway, it gave me something archaeological to think about for awhile. I believe the remaining features and sites were on my mind, as I had a dream about a conversation with some fellow archaeologists (in the dream, I was upset because I perceived being left behind, as I haven't done archaeology in a long time since I've been in the Army). This is only the third dream I've remembered since I've been here, which is odd for me, as I always used to remember my dreams before entering into the military.

During the first day of White STX, we occupied a simulated vehicle checkpoint, and had to search several vehicles that passed through. The checkpoint was surrounded by concertina wire, which is liked barbed wire but ringed with tiny razor blades - some nasty stuff. We also practiced clearing buildings using a "stack squad" - four or five people running through a room using SWAT-team like tactics. Others hid inside and played the part of the insurgents as well as innocent bystanders.

As it started to get dark at sunset, we set up our hooches. I was part of the battle buddy team of Jackman and Highe. The Drill Sergeant seemed impressed with the way I quickly and efficiently put up our 3-man hooch. Incidentally, White and Bucking struggled with theirs, and White was again trying to run the show. They had to finish putting it up in the dark. During the night, I had to pull a roving guard shift with Highe. This is even more boring than regular fire guard duty in the barracks, since it entails walking back in forth in the dark, with no flashlight.

In the morning, we had to tear down our hooches, only to put them back up again later. We spent most of the day engaged in squad tactics and attacking or defending other groups (using blanks in the M-16s). While attacking others, we learned to use various hand gestures to communicate. It was funny to see some of these people trying to move through the woods without making a lot of noise. For many of the folks here, this is the longest they've ever spent outdoors.

We expected that we would be gassed, but it never came to pass (I suppose the DSs are saving that for Blue STX, aka Victory Forge). However, a few males from my platoon decided to swipe another platoon's phase banner while they were sleeping - capture the flag, if you will. This happened in broad daylight. That platoon's Drill Sergeant was so upset (and probably embarrassed) that he stormed over to our platoon's encampment to retrieve his banner. He asked our DS which privates had stolen the banner, and confronted them. That DS then got quite physical with the privates in front of our DS and everyone in the platoon. The other's platoon's DS was a huge guy - probably 6'4", mean as hell, and very intimidating (this is also the jerk that made the disparaging comments to me when we were out at the rifle range). The Drill Sergeant grabbed one kid and hit him in the chest, throwing him on the ground. He then got the other kid and roughed him up, pushing hi against a tree, threatening to inflict bodily harm.

This kind of thing was probably normal years ago, but not really kosher in today's BCT. Later on our Drill Sergeant talked to the platoon about what had happened. He said that he was very shocked and disappointed to have witnessed the other platoon's DS' actions. It sounds like our DS is going to push for the offending Drill Sergeant's punishment. No one is sure what is going to happen. Whatever is the case, we will probably never know the outcome.

Last night was brutally cold to be sleeping outdoors. The temps dipped below freezing. Luckily the military sleeping bags are warm, but any body part exposed near the opening remains cold. I had my PT cap and gloves on, and still woke up several times from being too cold and uncomfortable.

I was supposed to have a roving guard shift last night, but we all got to sleep in, for a bad reason. Penny and Manacles were on guard duty and apparently decided to go back to sleep before being properly relieved at their post. So the chain was then broken, and none of the ensuing shifts were woken up. This is a big faux pas - one of the first things we learned in basic training was the general orders, one of which is "I will not quit my post unless properly relieved." Even though this was a huge infraction, it is unlikely that Penny and Manacles will be punished. Sadly, the Drill Sergeants often do play favorites here, and these two girls do get away with a lot of crap, being the cute girls of the platoon.

I'm about to give up on the hope of being helped today in sick call. They are often overbooked with appointments, and the system is overtaxed. This is what it must be like to be a patient in socialized medicine!

...

It is 5:56pm, and I did end up leaving sick call before I was able to be seen. They were too busy and had to turn soldiers away. I was able to obtain gauze and band-aids from the senior DS, and I still have a supply of Bacitracin (Neosporin), so I am going to try to take care of it myself (unless it gets more seriously infected, in which case I would have to go back for antibiotics). Again, I really hate going to sick call, but unfortunately we are forbidden from easily picking up requisite supplies that in the civilian world could easily be obtained from the corner drug store or convenient mart, and we can't have a lot of this stuff without a prescription here lest it be considered "contraband".

The DS is up in the barracks right now with bolt cutters removing the lock from Gallagos' locker. She is now officially AWOL, having failed to return from her emergency leave. We could all have predicted it. This makes two AWOLS now in our company.

Today was a good mail day. I received two letters from my husband, a card from my brother, a letter from a friend, and several postcards from one of my website moderators.

I had some good news today. After we throw live grenades tomorrow, we are going to turn in our IBA flak jackets. That means we will not have to lug along another 30 lbs on the last long road marches. I had heard the rumor that we were getting rid of them, but it was nice to have it confirmed. That is a huge weight off my shoulders, literally and figuratively.

I saw a template for the certificate that we will be given at BCT graduation. The Drill Sergeant asked us to look at our names to see if they were spelled correctly, and we had the proper rank. It is beginning to feel like it is truly almost over. I cannot wait!

#103 - PT test

2006-03-05T19:12:00.000-05:00

I did not get to write anything yesterday, as my schedule was quite hectic. It was partially a good day for me, and partially a bad one. The bad part first... I was unable to qualify throwing grenades, despite my best effort. Unfortunately I cannot lob the grenade far enough. We are not going to be throwing the live grenades until Thursday, so at least I have some time to practice my technique.

Onto the good... We had a diagnostic PT test yesterday (the test for record is in another week or so). I exceeded my expectations on how well I would do on the pushups, situps and the run. Not only did I get the number I needed to do to pass, but I met the higher standard that will be required of us in AIT. For the two mile run, I had 23:06 to complete it, and finished in 19:05 with 4 minutes to spare. Running two miles did suck, but I really pushed myself, and only walked for a few seconds at the end. There were many times when I wanted to stop, but I continued to think of my husband, and the fact that I needed to pass this test if I wanted to see him at graduation in a few weeks.

We are in the midst of preparing for White STX. I think my battle buddy White is mad at me. For the upcoming bivouac, the DS has allowed us to choose our own battle buddies for who we want to share a tent with. Everyone is choosing someone other than their assigned battle buddy. Three girls asked to be my battle buddy, and I decided to go with Jackman, since she is one of the few that I get along with here. Jackman's battle buddy wasn't happy about being stuck with someone like my own battle buddy, so we ended up deciding upon having a three-person hooch (we have an odd number of women in the platoon since Gallagos left). It looks like Bucking and White will end up sharing a hooch... hopefully they will get along ok.

On Sundays, in between bouts of "barracks maintenance", I usually try to spend some time visiting with my friends from the other platoons. Since I am stuck with my platoon 24/7, it usually makes sense to strike out and seek the company of others during our down time. I think everyone needs a break from the people they spend all their time with. It is possible to spend too much time with your platoon! It believe it is part of the reason there have been so many fights lately... people are just getting sick of having to deal with each other for weeks on end. There is also a theory that folks are so grumpy because they have gone without sex for so long... and cigarettes... and alcohol... and whatever they are really missing.

I'm still hoping for a chance to use the payphone before we strike out for White STX. The Senior Drill Sergeant decided against rolling up our phase banner (and taking away out privileges). I really think that the DSs are beginning to ease up on us a little bit, as it gets closer to graduation. One of our Drill Sergeants is coming back today, however, and things may change for the worse. He has been gone for two weeks to a Sergeant's school. We suspect that he may be something of a hardass when he returns, especially when he sees that the platoon is less disciplined than before he left. People here cannot seem to get their act together, even after all this time... it's amazing.

Ah, the barracks are getting noisy again as the church-goers return. Imagine ninety-nine females on one floor, most of them under the age of 22. The noise can be deafening. Many depart for Catholic mass around 7am, then the vast majority go to Protestant services at 9, and it is wonderfully quiet for a few hours. I look forward to that near silence every Sunday morning, though the pleasure is fleeting.

I was actually able to get in a little meditation and nap time in this morning. There are a few vacant bedrooms at the end of the hallway which serve this purpose very well. If the opportunity permits, I may also try to sneak in a short nap again later. I'm still not caught up on sleep. I will certainly need it, as we are beginning with a 7 mile road march on Monday morning, and it doesn't sound like we're going to get much sleep during White STX. One of the things we may have to do is pull "full perimeter security", which entails lying on the ground in the prone position with your M-16 propped up on your rucksack, in battle buddy teams, all night, fighting sleep and waiting for an "attack". I'm sure the company commander will be in the woods with his night vision goggles on, looking for anyone who is sleeping at their hasty fighting position. There is also "50% security", where one member of the battle buddy team sleeps for an hour, while the other person guards, and then they keep switching.

#102 - Bickering

2006-03-03T18:57:00.000-05:00

I am again at sick call, waiting for my turn in a den of hacking and sneezing soldiers. I came in to obtain some decongestant, cough syrup and more cough drops. I would probably try to suck it up a little longer, but I have a PT test tomorrow and my breathing is very difficult right now.

I usually wake up fairly early in the mornings to get ready, but somehow I managed to sleep in until the official wakeup time (this is not a good thing, as you never have enough time to get ready).

Yesterday there were almost two fistfights amongst the females of my platoon in the barracks. Apparently one of the girls pushed another, and in the midst of the scuffle, someone else got involved. The third girl ended up in a verbal altercation with another, so now there were actually four women screaming at one another. Luckily the DSs didn't hear the noise or we would have all gotten in trouble. I will be surprised if the platoon emerges unscathed and escapes an all-out brawl before the end of the BCT cycle.

I received a lot of mail yesterday, and still haven't gotten through all of it yet. I love receiving letters!

At the range we are supposed to be learning to detonate a Claymore mine. Claymores are filled with C4 and BBs - a nasty mix. Luckily we are practicing with "training aids", though I've heard that a few people may get to detonate the real deal. We are also going to get the chance to try out other types of weapons.

I will hopefully conquer two of my fears tomorrow. First thing in the morning is our PT test, and then we throw grenades. I am terrified of the grenades, since I am having difficulty throwing one the required distance. It is especially difficult wearing all the equipment - the IBA, LCE with canteens and whatnot, and Kevlar. Incidentally, I'm not the only one struggling with this - most of the short females are having a problem.

It is later in the afternoon. We spent the day learning to fire a number of bigger weapons including the SAW (Squad Automatic Weapon) and a 50 cal machine gun. Lots of destructive power (and noise) at my fingertips! There were a number of old tanks in the distance to fire at. It was somewhat enjoyable.

We returned to the company this afternoon. While we were cleaning our rifles in the platoon classroom, two of the females got into another physical altercation. The Drill Sergeant caught them this time and had to break it up. I would venture a guess that both of the girls will get in a lot of trouble, as DSs frown upon fighting. One of the girls, Bucking, has already been disciplined for wearing makeup on two occasions, and mouthing off to several people.

I am hoping that we will still receive our phone call privileges on Sunday. However, I have my doubts that this will happen. The DSs found out that the platoon has not been respecting Jackman as our Platoon Guide. They have been openly mocking her, especially while she marches us around. Earlier today someone was actually saying, "1,2,3,4, **** you bitch, **** you bitch!" in formation. The platoon's phase banner has been rolled up, the mark of shame. It is possible that we will not be able to use the phones this weekend unless the platoon can redeem themselves, which seems doubtful. There is still an incredible amount of bickering and fighting going on... I guess I'm surprised that the phase banner hasn't been rolled up all along.

#101 - Stylin' Army fashion

2006-03-02T15:10:00.000-05:00

It has been a relatively busy day. I am currently back at Reception, where we have received our deferred clothing issue. This included the green dress jacket, black trench coat, short sleeve and long sleeve shirt, black women's tie, shiny black shoes, long green skirt, and two black berets. It is 3:10pm and we've been here since about 7:00am.

I have to admit feeling a little bit of excitement upon donning the Class 'A' uniform, though I feel a little goofy wearing the black beret. I could live without the black "flasher" trenchcoat...lol.

#100 - The days drag on...

2006-03-01T16:45:00.000-05:00

I am sitting in the bleachers at yet another rifle range. This one was a bit difficult because the targets were green rather than black, and blended into the background. The weather is definately becoming warmer. It is sunny with a little breeze, and probably in the high 60s... a nice day, at least weather-wise.

This morning I ran for the first time in over a week. I had a difficult time with it because I am pretty sick right now. My throat is clogged with phlegm, and it felt like it extended into my lungs, which made breathing difficult. It was as if someone had a boot digging into my chest the entire time. I almost fell out of the run, but managed to hang in there and finish. It is frustrating because the Drill Sergeants will do everything in their power to discourage us from going to sick call. However, being sick for weeks and weeks without the benefit of even cough drops to alleviate the misery can be difficult to bear.

...

We finished early at the range and received an unanticipated visit to the Shoppette. I only spent about $30 there on a few items - mainly cough drops, a toiletries bag, moleskin, and some hand sanitizer.

I didn't do very well at the range toward the end. I had a weapons malfunction and lost out on using a number of rounds. Luckily this was just another practice run. I ended up spending much of the afternoon sitting around and bullshitting with various people in the platoon.

I am outside the Shoppette, and the sun is beginning to set. The interstate is behind us outside the fence of Fort Jackson, but the distant roar of traffic is not intrusive, but oddly calming. The sky is tinged with streaks of pink, and the temperature has cooled a bit with a pleasant breeze. It would be a good night to get behind the wheel of an automobile and ride with the windows down... or better yet, in a convertible with the top down. I have such a convertible at home, pictured above. It will be some time before I am behind its wheel again. I miss driving! :(

#99 - Guinea pigs

2006-02-28T18:34:00.000-05:00

At this moment I am inside a room of the Department of Defense Polygraphic Institute. We are going to be test subjects for students here at the institute. It is possible that we may be subject to interrogations, interviews or polygraphic tests. Half of us are going to be tested before lunch, and half afterwards. In the downtime, we will be stuck in a room with access to magazines, and a TV with a VCR and movies. Right now my platoon mates are going hog wild grabbing the magazines and arguing over which movies to watch.

...

It is after lunch now. I spent the morning undergoing a series of lie detector tests, not something I ever imagined that I would be doing. I had sensors placed upon my palm, around my waist and chest, arm, and buttocks too. I was asked a series of questions about past drug use, crimes, my credit history, etc. I did not try to lie about anything. From what I was able to tell, this type of testing seems to work. If you are even thinking about trying to hold something back, the sensors can pick up even the most minute change in your physiology.

I was told that I was one of the better test subjects that they had, and that I am not physically capable of effectively pulling off a big lie. That was not a big surprise, and everyone who knows me realizes what a horrible liar I am. Still, it was interesting to see it proven from a test.

The rest of the group is now being tested. We are now watching some film with Ben Affleck and Samuel L. Jackson. I have been able to spend some time reading 'National Geographic' and 'Food and Wine' magazines. I found myself reading just about every article, since I have been so starved for mental stimulation.

Last night there was a bit of excitement in the barracks because the MPs showed up to conduct an investigation. One of the girls from another platoon went AWOL. She had secretly kept a cell phone, and had used it to formulate an escape plan. She wanted to leave basic training because she was about to be a "restart" (someone who is made to begin BCT from day 1 - everyone's worst nightmare here). The rumor mill suggests that this girl broke into a closet where our personal bags were stored, and she took her clothes and belongings (apparently she removed the screws from the hardware that held on the padlock). She left to go to sick call, carrying a laundry bag with a change of clothes (standard procedure for those who are anticipating an overnight stay for something more serious). She went to the hospital as if she was going to sick call, but instead changed into her civilian clothes in the bathroom. Her boyfriend, who was in on the plan, picked her up, and she left post. Apparently she had been planning this for awhile and had told several people of her intentions. So now she will be getting in trouble not only for going AWOL, but likely also for destruction of government property.

We spent the rest of the afternoon watching the movie 'The Rock' with Sean Connery and Nicholas Cage... not a bad film. The rest of the platoon apparently did not undergo the lie detector test, but were subject to some kind of interrogation practice by the students at the institute. The folks who spoke with them said that the soldiers should merit an Oscar for their outstanding acting performances. I am sure there are a lot of folks here with skeletons in their closet who did not want to divulge such information to someone affiliated with the DoD.

...

It is 5:15pm, and I just had chow. I returned early from the dining facility to relieve the weapons guards. It was nice to have "real" food (relatively speaking) after eating MREs for lunch.

The most difficult part about being at the DoD Polygraphic Institute was trying to stay awake. Imagine being sleep deprived... more sleep deprived that you have ever been before... and being told to sit in a chair, perfectly still, in a quiet room... and someone asks you questions in a monotone voice, broken by long pauses... while a printer hums softly in the background. Imagine doing this for several hours. I hate fighting sleep... I really do.

On a different topic... I asked the DS today if we would be able to send or receive mail during the upcoming White STX bivouac, and was told "probably not". That's a bummer... oh well.

#98 - Reflexive fire

2006-02-27T19:25:00.000-05:00

I am again out at a rifle range. This morning we visited EST 2000 once again to engage in "reflexive fire". Part of it was actually... gasp... somewhat fun. They showed movie-like images of insurgents firing at you from behind a crowd of bystanders. Of course you had to aim for the bad guys with the weapons while avoiding the innocent folks.

We then shifted to an outdoor range to fire at pop-up and immobile targets at short intervals like 10 and 25m. I am becoming more comfortable firing the M-16 and think I did pretty well today.

We also practiced lobbing hand grenades over a wall. I'm more than a little bit worried, as I throw like a girl, and couldn't toss them far enough. I am going to practice my technique, as this is something I need to improve upon.

Everyone seems to be getting in trouble today. We always encounter a shakedown when we exit the rifle range, and one of the DSs found what was likely a love letter on one of the soldiers. I don't understand why people would be stupid enough to bring anything incriminating with them when they know well enough that they will be searched. It boggles the mind...

The platoon guide was fired this morning and replaced with the assistant platoon guide (a guy named Bugg). The new APG is my friend Jackman. Everyone seems to be upset by the Drill Sergeant's decision and is visibly bristling at the prospect of her issuing any orders. She is not well-liked here. I will admit that some of her actions can be perceived as a little abrasive at times, but usually her reactions are well-founded. She always says what I am thinking...lol. I suppose I would get in trouble too if some people knew what was only going through my mind.

Earlier today everyone was surprised to see our senior DS drive up in a very nice Lexus. I wonder how much an E-7 with 18 years of service makes? It seems that most everyone I've seen thus far in the military has a new car.

...

It is 7:20pm, and today was a good mail day. I received a letter from my husband, a card from my mom, a postcard from my website moderator, and a letter from a former co-worker who was shocked to learn that I had enlisted in the military.

From what we have been hearing, it seems like tomorrow may be an uncharacteristically easy day. Our company has been assigned "post detail". Each of the platoons could be assigned somewhere on base, helping out wherever it is needed, picking up trash, etc. I am in a group of 40 individuals whose detail consists of being sent to the Department of Defense Polygraphic Institute. The Drill Sergeant said that we may be employed as guinea pigs for the students of the FBI and CIA who are learning to use a lie detector. Sounds like it might actually be interesting!

We've been cut loose for the evening fairly early today. Having this free time is great. Granted, we are really supposed to be engaging in "barracks maintenance", but there is only so much sweeping, mopping and cleaning that folks can do. I'll pitch in and help for awhile, but after a bit, I'll try to catch a nap if I can. Sleep is always on my mind.

#97 - Another Sunday in the barracks

2006-02-26T23:20:00.000-05:00

It is Sunday afternoon, and I am sitting in the barracks. We have been given an unprecedented amount of free time today. I had weapons guard duty earlier for two hours. I then swept and mopped the bay, and helped one of my friends sweep and mop the hallway and stairs. Afterwards I sat around with the girls that I like from another platoon and we all shared ghost stories. I enjoy talking to them, and often go to their room down the hall to visit.

We are supposed to be receiving phone call privileges soon, so I am looking forward to that with a bit of cautious optimism. Sometimes there are promises of privileges that do not manifest, so I try not to get too excited... just in case it doesn't happen.

The AWOL-wannabe, Galagos, left yesterday. Apparently she was allowed to go home on emergency leave. Her family put in a Red Cross message because her grandmother could not find anyone to watch her kids. Most of the folks in the platoon suspect that this was a manufactured situation, because someone allegedly overheard Galagos coaching her grandmother on the phone, telling her what to say so that she could go home. No one thinks that Galagos is going to come back from her "emergency leave". I think she's planning to go AWOL, she'll take her lumps for doing so, and receive a dishonorable discharge. I would be schocked if she did return.

...

I was able to use the phone, and had a 5-minute phone call with my husband. It was wonderful, and I did not cry.

One of the platoons is downstairs eating pizza and watching 'Black Hawk Down'. The rest of the platoons complained because they did not get the same privileges, and were then compensated by being allowed to have an ice cream cone at the DFAC. This is what we've come to in our food depravation at basic training... fighting over pizza and ice cream. Hey, at least the ice cream was pretty good, so I'm not complaining.

I am pretty tired, though. I may try to sneak off and catch a nap if I can. The key is to hide in a room somewhere in the middle of the hallway so that a warning can be issued when a Drill Sergeant comes up the stairs. You do not want to be caught napping...

...

It is 11:09pm. I was able to get a few hours of sleep, and am now roused for a fire guard shift. Unfortunately I did not get a nap earlier as I had wanted. Bucking is walking the halls with insomnia because she had a two hour nap earlier. I don't think a nap would have disrupted my sleep schedule!

I believe that our first PT test is on Saturday, the same day we are going to the Shoppette. We are scheduled to have a seven mile road march on Monday morning, then White STX for three days. I don't know what we're doing when we come back, but at least we will likely transition from White Phase to Blue Phase over the weekend, which signifies the last portion of basic training. Blue Phase mostly consists of preparing for the final FTX (Blue STX, or Victory Forge here at Fort Jackson), taking the final PT test, the 9-10 mile road march, the 7-day Victory Forge FTX, and a 7-8 mile road march back. Once we return, we will be preparing for graduation and spending days cleaning and turning in all of our equipment.

Spending seven days out in the field is going to suck. It will not be like the many camping trips I've had at home. Getting hit with CS gas by the Drill Sergeants will be a big difference between the experiences...lol. I think we'll be so close to graduation at that point, however, that we won't care what the DSs are going to put us through.

Earlier in the evening there was a catfight between two of the females in my platoon. I am surprised that there have not been more of them, as people are always arguing and threatening one another.

#96 - Smokin'

2006-02-25T19:55:00.000-05:00

The company just experienced a smoking outside in the rain for 1/2 hour. We were supposed to learn "The Army Song", and most people were caught only lip-synching. The smoking session didn't seem to bother most people. It went longer than was probably necessary become some folks were laughing and goofing around while we were being smoked. You can tell that the collective mood is improving, and we're over the hump in BCT. In the beginning, everyone hated being smoked, but now it doesn't bother most people.

Today is the 32nd day of BCT, and the 41st day I've been at Fort Jackson. It seems so long ago that I was at Reception, and dropped off at the MEPS to begin my journey here. Now it seems like I've been at Fort Jackson forever, and this Army existence is the norm. How scary is that?

In some ways, it's been easier now to get used to the schedule, the surroundings, and the people here. Time, however, does not lessen the pain or loneliness I feel being away from my husband, my family, and home. Every Sunday I have the routine of coming back from breakfast, sitting in the latrine (my private space), looking over my photographs, and having a good cry. One of the most difficult things about BCT is being cut off from communication from the outside world. If I were able to use the phone every day, I'm sure this would be easier. But then again, BCT is not supposed to be easy, in any way...

I am on weapons guard duty. The other guard is complaining about how her brain is dying a slow death here at BCT. I guess I'm not alone in feeling this way.

I actually tried to meditate for a little while this morning while everyone was at church, but it was still too noisy in the barracks. It was worth a shot, anyway.

Last night I had the distinct displeasure of being roused from my sleep by a flashlight and screaming at 3:30am. The 1SG and two DSs made a surprise inspection of the barracks. Since it had rained nonstop the previous day, I had my rain poncho draped over the side of the bunk to dry (most of us did). The 1SG ripped it off the bed, kicked my mattress, and threw it at me.

Oh well, at least my locker hasn't been tossed lately. Every once in awhile they catch someone with an unsecured locker, and there is hell to pay.

Well, my shift is almost over, so it will be soon time for barracks maintenance, lunch, and probably details for the rest of the afternoon...

#95 - MOUT training

2006-02-25T17:55:00.000-05:00

It is after chow, and I have a few minutes to write. I had to accompany Bucking to the payphones so she could call home about a bank issue. Since I was at the phones, I tried to call my husband, but only got his voicemail. I have been to the phones several times with someone else, but this is the first time I have placed a phone call without permission. I am such a rebel... ;p

Another week in BCT has come and gone. This morning one of the Drill Sergeants was going through a list of tasks that we still need to complete, and it made it sound like graduation wasn't very far off.

Today it rained, and it is still raining. We learned about tactics and MOUT training (I believe it stands for military operations in urban terrain). We learned to clear a room with a "stack" of people like the troops do in Iraq. Then we simulated what would happen when soldiers had to cross through a group of hostile protesters. I got to play the part of one of the protesters. I channeled my best version of a angry local, wailing and beating her chest. It sounds funny, but this type of training is important, as many soldiers will encounter these type of situations in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Earlier today I accompanied Bucking to get chewed out by one of the Drill Sergeants. Someone in the barracks tattled on her for wearing makeup (!), so she had to turn in a contraband eyebrow pencil. As punishment of sorts, Bucking had to be the demonstrator in class when the DSs were teaching us how to apply camo face paint. Bucking looked like she was going to cry.

#94 - Halfway through BCT

2006-02-24T22:22:00.000-05:00

I am presently working a rare early evening fire guard shift. Bedcheck was 9pm, and I had to get up again at 9:40 for my 10:00pm shift. Of course the females in my room wouldn't shut up and go to bed when they were supposed to, so I only got about 5 minutes of sleep instead of 40 that I could have. It usually takes them at least a good 30 minutes to an hour to settle down every night and finally quiet down. It sounds like some kind of junior high slumber party with all the talking, giggling, and sometimes even farting. One of the females in the room also has the loudest hacking cough that I've ever heard. It sounds like an exaggerated version of a dying donkey. This girl will not cough all day while we are training, but suddenly when bedtime rolls around, she commences coughing like she is in her death throes. I may have to resort to wearing earplugs soon.

I believe our next bivouac begins next Thursday, and runs through Saturday. Somehow I doubt that I will be able to send and receive mail while we are in the field. I will continue to write, even if it is by a hidden flashlight in my sleeping bag.

I am not really looking forward to the remaining two field training exercises. First, it sounds like we are going to get even less sleep than usual. Second, there will be no showers and less than adequate personal hygiene capability in the field. Third, the Drill Sergeants are looking forward to gassing us, and I know this will inevitably come during the middle of the night while we are sleeping (and unprepared). Additionally, the bivouacs entail consuming nothing but MREs, which wreak havoc on the digestive system in ways I will refrain from elaborating upon. At least we will have the preparations for graduation to look forward to after the final FTX. The anticipation of that alone will make it more bearable. As of now, I've been at BCT for 31 days (at Fort Jackson 39 days), and basic is more than halfway over.

Next week we are going back up to Reception for our deferred uniform issue. This is when we will receive the new-style PTs and be fitted for our Class 'A' dress uniforms (they didn't issue them to us sooner, since so many people gained or lost weight in BCT). I'm sure everyone will be excited about this, as it makes the prospect of graduation tangible.

Tonight we were given our rifle medals for qualifying with the M-16. Our company actually had six experts, and many sharpshooters. I am satisfied with my marksman medal. I've been told that there will still be more shooting here, but at least the actual qualification is over with.

#93 - The confidence course

2006-02-24T15:26:00.000-05:00

It is 11:51am, and I am out at the confidence course. I was not allowed to participate, since I am technically still on medical profile. Well, I didn't want to have to do this, but I would have preferred to have gotten it over with, since I will likely have to come back again at a later date with another company.

Many of the obstacles in the confidence course involve climbing up walls, high ladders, sliding down ropes, etc. There is a 40' ladder that has rungs spaced far apart (far, that is, for someone short like me), and no mat underneath. I wonder if anyone has ever fallen while scaling that ladder? Some of the obstacles we've had to complete here have been very safe with padding, mats, cargo nets, or shredded rubber underneath them, but this seems to be an exception.

One of the females in my platoon, Galagos, has been having a lot of trouble traversing the obstacles this morning. At one point she refused to scale the tall ladder, and was surrounded by several screaming Drill Sergeants. She was also unable to scale a relatively short wall using a rope to climb up. She tried several times, but gave up. The Drill Sergeant told her, "That's ok, I have CQ duty tonight, and I will remember you!". Many of the people in my platoon believe that they are going to be smoked later because of Galagos' unwillingness to participate in the obstacles. I actually heard whisperings amongst the females with the words "fist" and "blanket party" uttered. I don't think Galagos is trying very hard, because she doesn't want to be here. She is the female who tried to go AWOL a few weeks ago. She told me that she plans to go AWOL on graduation day (I don't know why she would wait until then?). Apparently she has three kids at home who are being watched by their grandmother. When Galagos shipped to basic and the DSs started talking about everyone going to Iraq, she decided that she no longer wanted to be in the Army.

Well, at least there is light at the end of the tunnel for the rest of us. The Drill Sergeants told us that it's all downhill from here. There will still be the PT test, road marches, and the two bivouacs, but most of the tough stuff is over. Tomorrow we are scheduled to be engaged in some type of squad tactical movement drills. I believe this is one of the things in BCT that is new since the military has been involved in Iraq and Afghanistan.

There are times here when I feel very starved for mental stimulation. I miss my friends from home, as I feel I can't talk to a lot of the kids here. I usually amuse myself by writing many letters, or just examining my surroundings to keep myself busy. I try to make mental notes about everything that is around me, and figure out what parts I'm familiar with, and what is something I'm not familiar with. What types of trees are here at Fort Jackson? What types of construction are employed in the items on the courses? Could the buildings here be characterized as a specific type of architecture? How old are they? Are there are historic structures? Earlier I was looking at one of the obstacles here and commenting on it to myself. The retaining wall was three courses high, comprised of three 6'x6' pressure treated members, with added flying-buttress type supports to prevent the shifting of materials on the inside. An elevated tripod appeared to have the old pressure treatment - what were the ingredients they used... copper, mercury and arsenic, I believe. I was going through all of this and inadvertantly talking out loud, and someone nearby said that I was scaring them and didn't belong in the Army. ;p

I just feel starved for a good, deep conversation with someone. I find myself drowning in boredom. Being able to write is the only thing that keeps me sane here...

...

It is 1:55pm, after chow, and the company has resumed the confidence course. At lunch I finally found some conversation with Pvt. Jackman. She is only 18 years old, but one of the smartest people here. Her MOS is to be a Russian linguist/interrogator, with an AIT of 96 weeks. Jackman told me that she is also starved for some intelligent conversation, as most of the folks here want to discuss flatulence, food, rap music, or the ongoing subject of who they think is the platoon hottie. We ended up discussing politics and speculated upon the geopolitical and economic futures of China and Russia. I told her about the theory of evolutionary potential, and how a nation's natural resources can directly impact its ascent and downfall. I realized our conversation was probably too deep for some of the people around us, judging from the open mouths and odd looks on peoples' faces. I just wish there were more people like Jackman here for me to talk with. I guess I'm just really bored here in BCT...

I am stuck here watching the platoons' weapons because I am on profile. There are a number of others here with me - some on profile, and others who are in the process of being chaptered out of the Army. The conversation today has mostly revolved around a "snitch" in one platoon who ratted out several females for various infractions (these include someone having a belly button ring, one girl having possession of a cell phone in her locker, and people sneaking food into the barracks). One actually hears the phrase "blanket party" uttered here on a frequent basis, though I have yet to see (or hear of it) happening.

#92 - We all want candy

2006-02-23T19:55:00.000-05:00

We are still out at the rifle range. Lunch was MREs...again. I had the chicken fajita selection for the first time, which wasn't bad. It comes with two soft tortillas, rice, cheese spread, and a chicken/sauce mixture - way too much filling for the tortillas. Dessert was a raisin/nut mix which I gave away to one of the males. I did keep the vanilla cappacino mix, however, to slake my desire for something sweet. The taste is astonishingly similar to those International Foods coffee powders. Even the hint of coffee flavor was enough to make my tongue and taste buds dance with delight. I really miss coffee!

One of the girls in my platoon, Pvt. Bucking, got heckled earlier for trying to abscond with a pack of M&Ms from an MRE (we aren't allowed to keep the candy "contraband"). Each case of MREs should, in theory, have at least one menu containing a pack of Skittles or M&Ms. So if we have 4 cases of MREs, the Drill Sergeants expect that we should turn in 4 packs of Skittles or M&Ms, which almost never manifest. So, we usually end up getting in trouble because someone is taking the contraband candy. Many folks spirit the items away to the barracks hidden in the folds of their IBA for consumption at their leisure. The preferred alternative, however, seems to be wolfing down the contraband candy in the porta-potties right after we're done with chow. You can always see M&Ms wrappers in the toilet. These porta-johns are really nasty. How anyone could be comfortable eating something inside them is incomprehensible to me.

Uh oh... Pvt. White was just observed sleeping in the bleachers. One of the guys in the platoon spiked her kevlar helmet down in front of her to wake her up. She retaliated by throwing her helmet and cursing at him. Lately when White has been falling asleep at times whe she's not supposed to, someone from our platoon has been slamming a helmet down or otherwise making a loud noise to wake her up. She does this quite often. I was told that she fell asleep out at the rifle range a few days ago while she was in the prone firing position.

There is a rumor that our 1SG is going to condone a pizza party after we have our PT test. All soldiers will be allowed to participate, with the exception of my battle buddy, who has been given the nickname of "M&M" due to her recent contraband incident at the range. I won't turn down the prospect of having pizza, but I would rather indulge in other things... maybe some Ben & Jerry's ice cream, or organic dark chocolate... mmm...

...

It is 7:22pm and I'm sitting at my bunk in the barracks soaking my feet. Thankfully we have been given more free time lately.

We have not received mail for the second day in a row. I've been a bit pampered here, as my husband has written me every day during BCT. I have also received mail from my family and a few friends too. Receiving mail is always the highlight of my day.

Tomorrow we are scheduled to complete the confidence course. Honestly, I'm not really looking forward to it. There are many obstacles to traverse at heights, which is something that bothers me. I didn't mind rappelling at Victory Tower, but I hate climbing those huge ladders. If someone falls, they would be in a world of pain.

My battle buddy is currently spouting off about wanting to beat up several people. There is an incredible amount of posturing here at BCT. Everyone has to pound their chest and proclaim how tough they are several times daily. It's really quite ridiculous.

There are a number of folks here who are preparing to go home. They are being chaptered out of the Army for a number of reasons, premarily medical and mental health issues. There are a few mentally unstable individuals in the barracks leaving that many are happy to see go. I am sad to see some of the others leave. One girl claims that she is going to mail us all packages with contraband chocolate hidden inside. Somehow I think the Drill Sergeants would see through the ruse... I'm sure they've seen it all by now.

#91 - No PT?

2006-02-23T09:47:00.000-05:00

Normally I wouldn't be writing at this time of the morning. However, we heard a phrase spoken for the first time which warmed our hearts: "PT is cancelled today." We had a lot of rain here, and my guess is that the PT field across the street is just too wet. What a shame.

...

It is now mid-morning, and I've finished shooting at the range. I qualified again today (even though my magazine was short rounds), so now I will likely be left alone for the rest of the afternoon.

We've been eating nothing but MREs out in the field, and everyone is becoming tired of them. Most of the time we aren't given enough time to use the MRE heaters, so most of the entrees aren't very unappetizing eaten cold. I usually just end up consuming the crackers or wheat bread with peanut butter or cheese, some variety of cookie, pound cake or Ranger bar (kind of a very dry coconut macaroon). I was disappointed to discover that far less fruit is offered in these newer MREs than the old variety. Also, food is no longer freeze-dried, so you don't have to add water to the rare pears or peaches, if you can get them. I usually eat 1/2 or 1/3 of my MRE and give the rest of it away. This has apparently earned my some points with some of the males in my platoon.

It is another overcast morning with intermittent rain, but at least the temperature isn't very cold. Everyone is filthy and covered with wet sand. There doesn't seem to be much topsoil here on the ranges - just sand of varying colors, and pine - mostly longleaf and loblolly from what I can tell. There was a little critter running around in my line of fire on the range earlier, a black squirrel, the type of which I have never seen before (no I didn't fire at him). There are reportedly some feral cats also roaming around Fort Jackson, so he already has other dangers to look out for.

Well, this will be another long day on the range. I'm not sure what we'll be doing for the next few days, though I know our first "real" PT test is coming up, maybe Friday or Saturday. I may try to participate anyway, even though I'm supposed to be on profile. I would like to see exactly where I'm at on the two mile run.

#90 - Free time?

2006-02-22T23:13:00.000-05:00

I am currently engaging in a foot-soaking regime, and have time to write again today...

Once in awhile, the Drill Sergeants will cut us loose a little bit early for the night. This free time is precious. There is always something to do - whether it is organizing your locker, cleaning the barracks, preparing your laundry to wash or send out, or adjusting your equipment. I try to keep my locker squared away, as it makes it easier to find things as I need them, plus I'll have a head start on getting ready for the next inspection. Many of the girls in the barracks do not keep their lockers organized. I don't know how they can function! My battle buddy's locker has so much stuff thrown in haphazardly that when she opens the door, a waterfall of debris often falls onto the floor every which way. I don't think I could live like that. Many folks have to extract half the contents of their locker every time they need to locate a requisite item.

One of the females in the barracks is currently spouting off in the hallway about wanting to beat up someone who tattled on her to the Drill Sergeant. The drama here really never ends.

I came back to the barracks early from sick call, and had the unsettling opportunity to watch my platoon being smoked outside from the window. Apparently there was some big blow up over people talking in formation, and the Platoon Guide had ratted out the offenders to the Drill Sergeant. There is an element now who hates our PG. I'm happy that I no longer hold the position and have to deal with such crap. A lot of the members of my platoon are at each other's throats (worse than ever), and the platoon has still failed to come together as a team. The fights erupt several times daily, and are quite tiresome. Sometimes I wish that I was in another platoon, or could just go off on my own somewhere, anywhere, just to get away from the noise and arguing.

#89 - More range time, and sick call

2006-02-22T19:03:00.000-05:00

Earlier today we returned to the rifle range. Even though I qualified yesterday, I had to fire again twice. The weather was dreary and rainy. One of my battle buddies had a bit of a breakdown while we were there. I think she's had her fill of being stuck at BCT.

I had to go to sick call this afternoon. From Monday's road march, I have some massive infected blisters on the footpads of my feet. I knew they were bad when the doctor at the hospital visibly winced during the examination. I had the pleasure of letting her pick the blisters off to break up the skin (oww). I am now armed with antibiotics, some kind of topical cream, a bedpan and medicine to soak my feet in, bandages, and some 800mg Ibuprofen. I also have a 3-day profile which prevents me from having to run, jump or march. Hopefully that will give my feet time enough to heal up. I know we have another long road march sometime next week. I'm not sure what else I should be doing to prevent these blisters, as my boots don't really have enough room for the optional insoles that are sold at the Shoppette.

At least this week is going by fairly quickly. God, I cannot wait to get BCT over with. Sometimes I find it easier to be here, but there are other days which really suck.

This morning I couldn't run on the track because of my blisters, and I ended up walking it with a girl from another platoon named Bolt. We had an interesting conversation. Apparently she is a Celtic pagan, and practices various forms of magic, including stuff from the Golden Dawn (Aleister Crowley) vein. While we were walking the track, she looked at my palm and told me that I was supposed to have three children in the future. We will see, I guess...

Sometimes I may need reminders to let me know how good I have things at home. While I was at sick call today, I had a conversation with a different girl from another platoon. I asked her why she enlisted in the Army. She told such a harrowing tale of poverty and abuse, the likes of which I haven't heard in a long time. For many of the folks here, the military was really their best option of getting out of bad situations at home. One of the girls in my bay told me that BCT was the first time she has been able to eat three good meals a day because she was so poor in the civilian world. Wow.

#88 - Weapons qualification

2006-02-21T20:10:00.000-05:00

I have some good news. I was able to qualify with my M-16 this morning... on the first try. I have been very worried about my ability to do so lately, since I was only able to hit the closest targets. The minimum was a 23 (out of 40), and I got a 25. It's not the best score, but it's better than just passing, so I'm happy.

We were given three actual days to qualify - today, Wednesday and Thursday. We will still likely have to shoot on all three days, even if we qualified on the first day. If we get a higher score on another try, they will take the highest one. So, the pressure is off for me. If I can do better next time, great - if not, no big deal. It is an immense relief to have the qualification over with, and I'm in a great mood right now.

Most of the big hurdles of basic training have now passed. We still have the few long roach marches, but after the 5-mile one we did the other day, I have more confidence now.

I'm happy that I did well at all firing, as I was upset when I entered onto the firing line. One of the Drill Sergeants made a disparaging remark about my physical appearance. I have a skin discoloration on my face that I don't have any control over (it's not like we can wear makeup here), and he was making fun of me. What a jerk. I don't understand these people sometimes. Some of the DSs are so professional and are great at what they do, but some of them seem to use their position to abuse those under them for their own amusement. I suppose it's human nature, but disappointing, nevertheless. I just hated having to bite my tongue in this scenario. There are so many things I could have said in retribution to this guy if this was the civilian world, but I had to keep my mouth shut.

I'm still in a good mood, nevertheless. We had PT early this morning (wakeup was at 3:30am). I've been working on my situps on my own time, and I'm close to doing what I need to on that part of the PT test. We haven't actually been tested on the two mile run yet, so I don't know where I'm at with that. However, I haven't fallen out of a group ability run yet, so I'm taking that as a good sign.

Unfortunately my good mood may soon wane, as it seems we are going to be getting in trouble again for my battle buddy. Each time we finish firing the M-16 and exit the firing line, we must undergo a "shakedown". During this process, we take off all our gear, empty our pockets, and then are searched by the cadre for any "brass and ammo" (basically they don't want a disgruntled or psycho private to pocket some live rounds for use later on). Well, Pvt. White was caught with some contraband in her pockets, M&Ms and gum (we are not allowed candy!). Some of the other girls here sneak this stuff out of the MREs, but at least they have the common sense to immediate consume the food and dispose of their trash surreptiously (by such techniques as wrapping the item within a feminine hygiene product...lol). Oh well...

...

It is 3:00pm and I'm still at the range. There are a lot of folks who haven't qualified, and are on their 4th attempt. I feel fortunate to have gotten this over with this morning. The rest of the day was relatively uneventful, and consisted of sitting around or being tasked with details like picking up trash. We will be spending the next two days out here, and I anticipate having a lot of down time to catch up on my letter and journal writing.

...

It is 7:00pm, and we are cleaning our weapons in the barracks. Pvt. White is currently MIA from our platoon classroom. She often takes off without telling anyone where she is going. The irony is that she complained to the Drill Sergeants that she didn't have time to clean her weapon, yet she took off again. Some of the people in my platoon have a hard time understanding how I haven't flipped out on my battle buddy yet, and say that I must have an incredible amount of patience. I do try very hard to contain my composure, but I must admit that there are some days when it is very difficult to do so.

#87 - Road march, and the normal drama

2006-02-20T19:17:00.000-05:00

I am on another fire guard shift, and it is 1:17am. The other guard is sleeping in the chair next to me. I wish I could be sleeping too, as I'm utterly exhausted, but unlike many of the folks here, I don't nap through my duty. I tried, in vain, to catch a quick nap yesterday when we were in the barracks, but each time I would fall asleep, a Drill Sergeant would suddenly appear in the hallway. I made half-hearted attempt to watch 'Gladiator' last night in the platoon classroom downstairs, but I couldn't help but to nod off during the movie. Luckily we did have the option of going upstairs if we didn't want to watch it. I thought I could have an opportunity to catch a nap then when I came upstairs, but I ended up consoling a girl whose grandmother had a heart attack recently. Obviously that was more important than napping.

Of all nights, this is not the one I want to be on fire guard. It could have been worse, however - at least I don't have a 2-hour CQ shift.

One of the platoons had their phone call privileges revoked last night after a less-than-satisfactory barracks inspection. I'm surprised we didn't have our privileges revoked as well, as there was a bunch of crap left in our room by... guess who... my battle buddy. I think people are on the verge of beginning to slap her around for continually screwing up. I tell White every day about leaving stuff on her bed (or hidden behind her bed), but she refuses to listen. At this point, I just don't know what to say anymore. She doesn't seem to care if she gets in trouble, nor if she gets us all in trouble.

I had a dream last night which did not involve Army-related subject matter. Maybe that's good, as my mind is realizing that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I just wish there was one good opportunity to recharge my body and catch up on sleep... just one time - one good night of sleep, and I would be satisfied. Being tired all the time is one of the aspects of basic training that I hated the most the first time I went through BCT, and I still despise.

It is about 4:30pm, still Monday. This morning's road march wasn't as bad as I had expected it would be. The pace was a bit slower than the last few marches, so I was better able to keep up. It still was physically difficult, however. For the last two miles, I felt like I was lightheaded and having an out-of-body experience. It was pretty weird, but good in a way, because I didn't realize just how exhausted I was until it was over. I have some monster blisters on the bottoms (pads) of my feet, but emerged otherwise unscathed except for being even more dog tired today.

For the remainder of the day, we were cycled through a series of classes ranging from field hygiene to administering an anti-nerve agent to performing CPR. A lot of people had difficulty staying awake. People are generally tired, and grumpy. Well, perhaps grumpy is too nice of a word. Over the past few days, several members of my platoon have been really at each other's throats. The conflict usually goes something like this:

A: "Shhhhhh!"
B: "Shut up! You, shut the hell up!"
A: "Why don't you shut the hell up!"
B: "You're the one making all the noise. It's always you. Shut up already."
A: "No, it's you that's always talking, idiot. **** off!"
B: "**** you, asshole!"
A: "C'mon boy, start with me. I'll kick your scrawny ass. Just try it."
....ad nauseum ;p

Yesterday one of the guys and one of the girls got into it so bad that I thought it was going to progress into an actual fistfight.

Sometimes I feel like I am trapped in a mass of people that I very much different from. I don't know if it is that I am so much older than some of these kids, or that I'm more mature... Of course, I'm not perfect in any sense, but at least I can get along with my fellow soldiers. It is very frustrating to continually get in trouble for the shortcomings of others, like the aforementioned verbal altercations. There are so many people here with attitudes. Most people here act like they must have been the toughest one on the block from whatever town they hail from, and want the whole world to know of their supreme prowess in being a badass.

...

It is 6:30pm and we have been cut loose for a little while to engage in "barracks maintenance". At 8:45pm we have the nightly "toe the line" ritual where everyone must line up in the hallway outside their bay rooms to be accounted for. I'd love to get to bed early if I can, though it's probably not an option. I usually feel guilty about not doing any cleaning if we are supposed to be engaging in that activity, and even if the Drill Sergeants aren't around, the girls in the barracks are usually making so much noise that it is nearly impossible to tune them out. I think tonight is an exception. Right now I am so exhausted that I could probably sleep through a marching band. I think I could probably sleep through the band tromping all over me. God, I would give almost anything for sleep. We are all soooo tired...

#86 - Mottos and contraband

2006-02-19T16:56:00.000-05:00

Awhile back when I was platoon guide, I had to come up with a motto. I had about 5 minutes to do so, and came up with this:

"In the dark of the night
Under the moon
Hey Charlie Rock
It's first platoon

Nightstalkers
Put to the test
Nightstalkers
Best leads the rest
Hoooah!"

It was pretty lame, but relatively short (short is good, as you have to sound off with these mottos several times a day). Someone came up with another idea for a new platoon motto. I think it is based off the tune of a popular song, but it's not anything I'm familiar with:

"Cocked, locked and ready to rock
Pain and death are what's in stock
Through the night we'll stalk you down
Your blood and guts upon the ground
Oooh
Hold up... hey hey
1st platoon's gonna bring you so much pain
Nightstalkers are gonna go all the way
Hey 2nd, 3rd and 4th will be ashamed
We're disciplined as hell
Hey, hey, hey, hey nightstalkers don't play"

Lol...I find these platoon mottos very entertaining. Sometimes I have a difficult time cueing in to the cultural references promulgated by the youngsters around me. Yeah, I know, I must be old... or out of touch... or something! When someone does something wrong, for instance, they apologize by saying, "My bad". What is that? My bad self? My bad attitude? My bad mistake? My bad incompetence? They say "my bad" instead of the proper "I am bad" or "I am sorry", but no one seems to know where the phrase originated.

It is Sunday, and I am in the barracks. The teeming masses have returned en masse from a church service, and the bay is again noisy with the shrill competing voices of 99 girls. It was just so quiet a little while ago... ahh...

...

After lunch, I worked on a detail picking up trash around the company area. At least the weather was somewhat pleasant. Afterwards, we continued with "barracks maintenance". In the past I've always done other things like sweeping the hallway or cleaning the latrine, but today I mopped our bay room for the first time. It quickly became apparent that none of the girls who had previously done this had done a very good job... eck. Most of these females are very young, and maybe haven't had to really clean before. Don't folks help their parents at home anymore? A lot of people here have seemingly never had a broom nor mop in their hands before they enlisted in the military.

We just had a formation. It sounds like they are finally easing up on some of the restrictions here. After chow, we have been tantalized with prospect of a 5-minute phone call. The Drill Sergeants are also going to set up DVD players in two of the platoon classrooms so that folks can watch either 'Gladiator' or 'Band of Brothers'. Everyone here is so starved for entertainment that the air is tinged with a palpable excitement. The females are very giddy right now, and everyone is in a good mood. Hopefully the company won't do something stupid to screw it up by pissing off the DSs. I know that some girls here are taking contraband from the DFAC into the barracks. We eat three times a day... always. Though the actual dining experience (if you want to call it that) is only a few minutes in duration, most times it is possible to eat enough. I don't know why people feel the need to squirrel away all this other food for a later time. Some girls have muffins, apples, pears, granola bars, MRE items, and all kinds of stuff in their lockers. They are going to get caught, sooner or later.

#85 - Range time, hand-to-hand combat, and the usual drama

2006-02-18T22:26:00.000-05:00

Today was a good mail day. I received 2 cards from my mom, and 2 letters and a package from my husband. Receiving mail here means a lot.

We are allegedly receiving a phone call today. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. We've been promised this before, but it doesn't always happen. Sometimes we are teased with the prospect of something good happening, but the reward is ruined because of other peoples' behavior.

Friday was spent on the range. At one point, our Drill Sergeant asked for "20 high-speed, highly motivated volunteers" for a detail. I jumped up, along with about nine others. He had to repeatedly ask another 10 folks to join us, and finally had to assign people to come, since folks were being lazy and didn't want to volunteer. I thought that was not a good sign. It was fortuitous that I did volunteer, as the DS decided to smoke the rest of the company for not doing so. It was a bad smoke session, with flutter kicks, rifle PT, mountain climbers (being in the front leaning rest/pushup position, with your legs running in place beneath you) - and everyone was smoked on two separate occasions while the rest of us were on a detail. Contrary to popular opinion, sometimes it is better to volunteer in basic training.

Yesterday morning we had more instruction in hand-to-hand combat. One of the moves we learned was "shrimping", which is basically turning and wriggling your body to get out of a hold. The Drill Sergeants teaching the class amused themselves by making the company "shrimp" back and forth across a large field. It was almost as tiring as the low crawl. Somehow I got out of participating in the hand-to-hand combat matches, but watching the others was very amusing. The best match, by far, was the female lightweight class. Two of the smallest girls in my platoon, Bucking ("Army Barbie") and Penny, went at it with incredible ferocity. They were rolling around so much that they went halfway across the field and into the area where another platoon was having their match. Another female bout involved one girl pulling another's hair (ouch!). During one of the male matches, one guy was choked so hard that he lost conciousness for several seconds. The DSs probably find this fairly entertaining, as we certainly did.

I am doing laundry right now, and there was just a confrontation between Bucking and White. The "c" word was used...lol. There was so much screaming that the Drill Sergeants came in to see what was going on. Ah, the drama...

I am unfortunately still sick, though I've been taking the cold medicine that I got from sick call faithfully. I wonder if it is even possible to get better here, as people just pass illness back and forth between them. There is also something of a pinkeye epidemic amongst the females. That is definately something I don't want to get!

Tomorrow is a five mile road march with full battle rattle - kevlar, LCE, IBA, rucksack, and M-16. I'm not really looking forward to it. If they just walked a little slower, I swear I could march all day, but it's hard for someone with short legs to keep up with the company commander's pace (he is an infantry guy, and is always in a big hurry). I may have to fall back in the formation while we are marching, but I won't fall out... no matter what.

#84 - Day 24 of BCT

2006-02-17T14:20:00.000-05:00

I am once again on fireguard duty, and have a little time to write. I am surprised to note that we've been at basic training now for over 3 weeks, and at Fort Jackson for 32 days now.

For a fire guard shift, you must change into the full ACU uniform from your PTs, only to sit in the hallway for an hour. Then you have to change back into your PTs to sleep. In my opinion, it's a real pain in the ass. We usually have a few cleaning duties assigned to each shift. I am pretty tired this morning. We had more 4:00am wakeups this week than ever before to accomodate our schedule at the range. We usually are rushed out into the field in the dark, only to lay in the prone position for an hour or two "pulling guard duty" and waiting for the sun to come up so we could begin to shoot. ;p

This morning we are scheduled to have PT and then to go back out to the range. I am (relatively) happy because I know the weekend is just around the corner. Saturdays are still a full day of training, but on Sunday we get to sleep in until the relativately late time of 6:30am. Other than a few details, we have some free time to ourselves. The first few days of next week will also be spent out at the range. At some point soon we will also be having "White STX", a 3-day bivouac. I have heard that we will likely be gassed during "Blue STX", aka Victory Forge, the final 7-day bivouac, though I'm not sure if it will happen during the upcoming one.

Some of the training here has changed to reflect the war on terrorism. One of the things we've been taught is how to set up a checkpoint for vehicle traffic. A lot of the other items being taught always come with "You'll need to know how to do this once you go to Iraq". Speaking of the sandbox, I haven't heard anything else about my Reserve unit and whether or not there are plans to deploy.

The days are thankfully beginning to pass more quickly now. This routine is becoming "normal". Everyone I've talked to has found that their dreams at night only revolve around other people in BCT and no longer have to do with anything else. It has been the same for me, though I remember fewer dreams than I did before joining the Army. Usually waking up in the morning is a rushed, stressful time, a moment of hopping right up and grabbing my flashlight, and quickly grabbing my clothes to get dressed. I miss the lazy mornings at home waking up in bed with my husband. I can't dwell on thoughts of home too much, as it makes me sad. I can only focus on being here for the time being.

...

It is late morning, and I've finished shooting at the range. I'm still having a difficult time hitting targets that are farther away. We wil still have a few more days on the range before we have to qualify with the M-16, but I am beginning to worry about my ability to do so. We had to fire from the prone supported position (lying down with the rifle propped up on sandbags), the prone unsupported position (not having the sandbags, and being propped up solely on your elbows), and the kneeling position. Targets were at 75m, 150-200m and 300m. I hit almost all of the close targets, a few in between, and none of the 300m ones. I'm beginning to get frustrated. Of course there is always the fear that if I fail to qualify I might get "recycled" (in other words, put back with another company to repeat the process - everyone's worst nightmare in basic training). I'm hoping my technique will improve over the next few days.

Right now my platoon is sitting in the bleachers waiting for others to finish firing. The platoon members are at one another's throats. People are bitching and cursing at one another. I think they are on the verge of drawing negative attention to themselves. The last thing you want is for the Drill Sergeants to see everyone fighting. There is so much drama and infighting here that someone remarked it is like a bad version of a reality TV show like "The Real World".

It's almost lunchtime, so I have something to look forward to. Not sure if we are eating A-rats or MREs in the field. It is amazing how you come to appreciate the little things, like a (relatively) unhurried meal.

The people next to me are practicing "The Army Song". We were smoked last night for not knowing it. At least their voices are drowning out some of the folks who are arguing. I took out my earplugs when I came off the range, but I might just put them back in again!

#83 - More range time

2006-02-16T20:22:00.000-05:00

It is late morning, and I just finished shooting at the indoor EST 2000 range again. For some reason I have been having trouble lining up the front and rear sight pictures, especially indoors. I was singled out and yelled at by the cadre member in charge of the range. I really do think I'm becoming numb to all the yelling, but there are times when it does get to me. Sometimes I fear that I might snap one of these days and tell somebody to go and **** themselves. I know we all feel like that at times.

It's a good thing that my husband can't see me now, as I'm pretty much beat up. I have a black eye (shiner) from the M-16 hitting my glasses, another black and blue mark on my face, my chin messed up from the kevlar strap rubbing against it, my face and lips are horribly sunburned from being out on the range all day, I have cuts all over my hands, brush burns on my shoulders and legs, and at least 3 or 4 dozen sizeable bruises or black and blue marks all over my legs, torso and arms. I am not feeling very attractive right now.

One of the Drill Sergeants yelled in my ear so loud this morning that it's amazing I did not incur permanent hearing loss. It's the same DS from another platoon that I don't like. There are some Drill Sergeants here who normally yell only when privates are doing something wrong, not just for the sake of yelling or scaring people. I like one of the DSs from another platoon, DS Chalmers. She seems to be the epitome of a military professional. She also doesn't seem to unnecessarily yell nor take delight in verbally flagellating soldiers. She is usually the Drill Sergeant heading up my group ability runs in the morning. I run beside her in the 'C' group, since I am among the shortest females in the company. There is a girl who is 4'6" up in front too, and runs besides me. Whenever I think I am having it too hard during the runs or on a road march, I just think of what that woman is going through, and push myself a little harder.

This morning we did have a run for PT, the first in quite some time. I heard the Drill Sergeants complaing amongst themselves that we've hardly been running at all this cycle. I believe the distance covered was somewhere between 1 1/2 and 2 miles. I am happy to report that I did not fall out of the run. We had a group of about 50 folks running with the 'C' group, and of that number, 13 people fell out. I believe that my cardiovascular fitness has been enhanced since I got here, as the run didn't kick my ass like I thought it would. At this point it's actually my legs that hurt me more than the breathing, which was usually the most difficult part of running for me. I am beginning to think that it will be possible to me to pass the run on our PT test.

...

We just finished with another trip to the Shoppette. It was again the highlight of my week. I purchased more stationary, stamps, a few postcards, two cards, two bags of cough drops, baby wipes, and a few odds and ends.

Tomorrow we are spending another day out at the range. I am hoping to improve. For some reason it seems like I've been having a more difficult time shooting this time around than I did the first time I went through basic training, though I'm not sure why.

On Saturday we will be having some additional hand-to-hand combat training. Should be fun.

#82 - BRM continues

2006-02-15T04:54:00.000-05:00

I am working a shift at the CQ desk downstairs in the barracks, and it is 4:54am. I didn't get to go to sick call yet, but will this morning. If this was the civilian world, it would be easy enough to go to the corner convenient store to pick up items like cold medicine and cough drops, but it's impossible to do so here. Sick call is the only "legal" way of acquiring anything that can alleviate my misery.

We are spending the next several days at the rifle ranges. I was successful in grouping my shots, and still need to work on zeroing (this is where your rifle sights are adjusted so you can hit the target consistently). On the range I have been paired with a female from my platoon that I am not enamored of. She has a reputation for being quite bitchy. She actually makes me miss my battle buddy!

...

I am now at the battalion aid station (sick call) with a room of sneezing and hacking soldiers. I'm trying to obtain some badly needed cold medicine, cough syrup and cough drops. My throat is pretty sore since I've been hacking for so long.

The civilian in charge of sick call is a retired 1SG. He is yelling at everyone to be quiet. I believe I am slowly becoming numb to getting yelled at, reprimanded, and called names. Our Drill Sergeants aren't bad compared to what I've seen in the other platoons. Some of the DSs can be cruel in their name-calling. There is one girl in my company who is always called a fat ass... poor thing.

I've noticed that there are a number of things which have changed from my first BCT experience at Fort Jackson. The Army has subcontracted out everything from food to laundry to some training to civilians. There is no longer required KP duty in the chow hall. A civilian was running the tower at the range yesterday (possibly the most inarticulate individual I've ever heard on a loudspeaker... quite disturbing to know that instructions on a range are issued by a man that no one can understand).

I am out at the range now waiting for my turn to enter onto the firing line. The weather is uncharacteristically hot, and has taken us all by surprise. This is more what I thought South Carolina would feel like. I think I will end up with a sunburned outline of a kevlar chinstrap on my face from the sun. I already have several black and blue marks on my face from the retort of the M-16, including a shiner under my right eye. It looks like I was in a fight. I have a tendency to get a little too close to the weapon when I am firing.

I got some good stuff at sick call - decongestant, cough syrup, cough drops, ibuprofen, bandaids, and neosporin. The cold medicine they give out makes you feel drowsy (as if we need that here), but at least I feel like my sinuses are beginning to clear up.

I haven't been at this kind of a range before. There are computer monitors at each firing position. A printout gives you feedback on exactly where you are hitting the targets. High tech stuff.

...

Just finished zeroing at the range. I think I used up all the ammo on Fort Jackson in the process. One of the Drill Sergeants discovered that my weapon has been mis-adjusted by another DS near the end. After he fixed it, I successfully zeroed on the first two magazines. He told me that if my Drill Sergeant had done his job properly adjusting my weapon, I would have zeroed a long time ago. He then began to talk smack about our DSs to the 1SG and the company commander. Apparently there must be some animosity between the individual Drill Sergeants. I suppose one never really knows what goes on behind the scenes, even at basic training...

...

We are standing around waiting for our motor movement. We are supposed to be cleaning our weapons, but the Drill Sergeants forgot to bring along our cleaning kits.

One of the girls left her hat out on the range. The Drill Sergeant is making her low crawl several hundred meters to recover it. Some of the things the DSs do are funny. My battle buddies in the barracks once left me behind while I was in the latrine. They were supposed to be watching my weapon (we're not allowed to take them into the bathroom), and left it on my bed. One of the DSs discovered it and punished me by making me carry around a huge training mockup of an M-16. This sucker was heavy. I actually found a photo of this on the web:

Of course it was really my battle buddies' fault for not securing my weapon, but I learned a valuable lesson... choose carefully the people you entrust your rifle to. The sad truth is that I've learned here that many folks are only out for #1. There are more takers than givers. A lot of people will willingly take your help, but never volunteer theirs. It is annoying sometimes, but there isn't much you can do. I suppose it's human nature, but a disappoinment, nevertheless.

Tomorrow we will have more time at another rifle range. We may also be going back to EST 2000, the indoor range.

...

Right now we are cleaning our rifles in our platoon classroom. The Drill Sergeant has left the room, and the members of my platoon are being loud and boisterous. The girls next to me are singing some horrible country music song. I wouldn't be surprised if everyone gets in trouble for being rowdy. At least they are in a good mood...

#81 - Another busy day at the range

2006-02-14T09:16:00.000-05:00

This is the second day that I haven't been able to write very much. Our wakeup is at 4:00am, and we've spent the entire day at the range. Right now I'm physically exhausted. Tomorrow morning I'm planning to go to sick call. It's probably not good that I've had this cold now for nearly a month.

#80 - White phase & rifle marksmanship

2006-02-13T21:12:00.000-05:00

I've been very busy today and quite sleep-deprived, so I don't have much time (or energy) to write. We began the day at 5AM on one of the live-fire rifle ranges. We grouped shots with the M-16. I had a little difficulty at first until I got my firing position down. I forgot how much I enjoyed firing the M-16. We will now spend the next two weeks on basic rifle marksmanship.

Our company guidon was just changed from red to white, signifying the phase change. This symbolizes our ascent into the middle of basic training. Everyone was in a good mood because of it. We still have awhile to go, but at least there is light at the end of the tunnel.

#79 - Another Sunday

2006-02-13T08:49:00.000-05:00

It is 4:28am, and I am on fire guard duty. I don't have as much time to write on this shift, as the prior fire guard was late in waking up my shift. Today is Sunday, the day I usually look forward to all week. There are usually details galore to keep us busy, but it is a day of relative rest.

It's been a rough week, and I'm very tired. I was almost falling asleep during "Drill Sergeant time" last night (the period before our last formation where the DS goes over our training, passes out mail, etc.). I received two letters and three cards yesterday, which was really nice.

We were told that we will have another visit to the PX/Shoppette on Thursday afternoon. Visits to the Shoppette are highly anticipated, as one could probably imagine. Being cut off from the rest of the world is difficult enough, but not being able to pick up the daily essentials is unpleasant as well. I've been dying to get some cough drops. The irony is that I was harrassed by a Drill Sergeant during my last visit to the PX for buying 15 cough drops, which lasted about three days. I've been sick since January 17th, so I could have used a lot more. We are also constantly hearing about sick call from the 1SG. He says that we have too many people going to sick call in the morning, and that they are "weak, dirtbags, and fakers". I suppose this also includes the folks going for stress fractures, broken bones, severe asthma, and other ailments. Hooray Army of One! Granted, there are a few "sick call rangers" present, so the 1SG's criticism is not entirely without merit. One girl here is trying everything possible to get a discharge. She has so many bottles of pills prescribed that her wall locker looks like a pharmacy.

Our platoon's phase banner was unfurled yesterday, so we must have done something right. The platoons were allowed to sing cadence again, and everyone was very excited about the prospect. I think the cadre punished us on purpose just so everyone would become more motivated. Absence does make the heart grow fonder - even if it's somthing minor like being able to call and answer in cadence.

We saw another company in our battalion at the DFAC yesterday. They were apparently graduating from basic training this week. Of course everyone wished that we were already there. I haven't begun counting down the days left in BCT, as there are still too many, and it would just be depressing, at this point. Right now I'm just trying to take it day by day. The things I am tasked with finishing are often very difficult physically, so it's usually a matter of trying to make it through the next five minutes, or ten minutes, or hour. I take it one task at a time, and make it through via these small victories, rather than thinking of the momentous challenge of the weeks ahead.

Yesterday morning we were supposed to have a motor movement (bus ride) back from the field, but the 1SG decided to make our company march in the rain. It kicked my ass pretty well, but I hung in there. I felt bad for one woman from another platoon in my company who fell out of the road march. She is only 4'6"! I wonder if she must have gotten a waiver for her height to enlist in the Army.

It is almost time for my shift to end, so more later...

It is now early afternoon. Today it is sunny but cold - probably in the 40s with a wind chill that makes it seem much colder. We just returned from lunch at the DFAC, following by a detail picking up trash around the company area. I wouldn't have minded much except for the cold temps.

We're back in the barracks now. Everyone is cleaning, and I've been assigned to guard the weapons rack. The 1SG and company commander aren't here today, so people seem to think they will be left alone.

Today I had a discussion with a bisexual female in my bay. She told me that at least 40% of the females here are lesbians or bisexuals. She said that they are able to identify one another through the mysterious powers of "gaydar". There were some recent incidents where folks have said they've seen fraternizing between females in the barracks. I say "don't ask, don't tell". I have had plenty of gay or bi friends over the years, and this doesn't bother me in the least, though some of the females are disturbed by the incidents.

I started to write a little about some of the people in my platoon a few letters ago, and didn't get a chance to finish. There are only a few females in my platoon that I've bonded with (names of the everyone changed for this blog). Newman is pretty cool. I've talked to her a lot, as she was the assistant platoon guide when I was PG. Waterford is a hyper goofball, but I don't mind her company, as she always keeps me entertained. Unfortunately she is being chaptered out and sent home because of a back problem. There is a girl here named Jackman that I am just starting to talk to. I like her. She is very young, but seems to be very intelligent, and interesting to converse with. Then there is Pvt. Bucking... she is known as the "Army Barbie" or "Barbie" because of the sheer volume of skin/hair/makeup products she seems to have in her possession. This was the girl that I wrote about earlier in Reception toting around three large suitcases. She is, along with me, one of the shortest females in our platoon. I enjoy her company, but a lot of the other girls here are mean-spirited and argumentative. There are two girls in the platoon who ditched their battle buddies (Penny and Manacles). They are fairly attractive, and seem to be cut a lot of slack by the (male) Drill Sergeants. There is also a girl named Gallagos that I like. She is painfully shy and quiet, but a nice person. She is the female that recently tried to go AWOL, so we've talked quite a bit (I've tried to tell her that it will get better, but she misses her kids and doesn't want to be here anymore). There is another girl in the platoon named Pear that usually takes on other people's fireguard shifts... sometimes several a night. I don't know how she exists on such little sleep. Oh yes, and we cannot forget my battle buddy, Pvt. White. She is a nice person, but still has a lot to improve on. She's still always late for formations, forgetting her uniform or equipment, or falling sleep in class. I'm still trying very hard to be nice to her. I've done my best to help White - we all have - but sometimes it doesn't seem like it's making any difference.

Onto the males of the platoon. There is Cameron, a born leader who is always trying to whip everyone into shape. He is frustrated because he was not chosen to be a platoon guide, and few here will cede to his authority without such a title. Tenner is an ex-British military guy who is married to an American. Sometimes it is a little odd to hear a British accent sounding off in an American army formation. There is a guy named Pitt that is always asking me about other girls. He harbors the delusion that everyone here must lust after him. Then there is a guy named Gregg, nice enough, but scatterbrained and always forgetting things. Most of the males here have never been away from home before, which I find surprising.

I still talk to the friends I made in Reception who are in the other platoons - Bedar, Jenkins, Mango, Jacobs, and a few others. The girls often share photos and letters from home. I try to talk to them in the barracks every chance I get. It's just a disappointment that I didn't end up in their platoon, or I might have had a different experience here at BCT.

#78 - Red STX continues

2006-02-11T05:40:00.000-05:00

It is Saturday morning, and I am writing this in the dark. It is cold and raining. We have mostly packed up our gear and are waiting in our hooches for further instructions.

I continue to argue with White over just about everything. Sometimes I just give up and do things her way because I'm tired of arguing. Earlier she was rolling up her sleeping bag outside the tent in the rain, and then complaining because it was wet. She then walked off to go and talk with someone else in the platoon, and left her bag sitting in the rain. Such events make me scratch my head and wonder.

We were supposed to do rifle PT this morning, but there is the possibility that it may be cancelled due to the weather. The Drill Sergeants always say, "If it ain't raining, we ain't training" though sometimes it isn't true. I won't be too disappointed if it is cancelled, as rifle PT is about as much fun as it sounds like.

We had guard duty in rotating shifts last night in the dark, walking around the perimeter of our little encampment. We weren't allowed to use flashlights. At first it is difficult to see in the dark, but after awhile you begin to develop a bit of night vision. The males are on one side, and the females on another (our guarding was restricted to the side of our gender only, lest we see something in someone else's hooch that we shouldn't). My battle buddy didn't understand what we were supposed to be doing on guard duty, and insisted that she roam about in the middle of the encampment. She spent much of the time walking around the Drill Sergeant's tent at the control point, while I stayed guard on the outside of the perimeter like we were instructed to.

My sinuses were cleared up by the visit to the gas chamber, but the cold is back again. Everyone here is sick. I have been coughing ever since I got to Reception on January 17th. I would not be surprised if it continued for the duration of basic training.

#77 - Teamwork development course & Red STX

2006-02-10T11:02:00.000-05:00

Right now I am freezing my ass off waiting to begin the TDC (Teamwork Development Course). It is in the mid 20s this morning. We had a short road march over here, and I almost injured myself in the dark. My glasses fogged up and I could not see, so I tripped in a hole. Sometimes I really feel like a dork here.

The objective of this course was a fostering of teamwork and cooperation, and in this, I think it was a success. After some initial squabbling, most people seemed to eventually figure out the problems and help each other as a team. We were given several obstacles to overcome, and limited materials to work with. Several involved spanning platforms or piers with boards of varying sizes, or having to move materials or personnel from one end to another. Most of them could only been completed in one way like a puzzle which had to be figured out. One of the obstacles involved roping up someone in a seat, and transporting them across a rope to help "evacuate a casualty". Below are a few photos from the course:

&

My platoon was late showing up for formation this morning, so we got a major ass-chewing. As punishment, the DSs are threatening to make us all stay awake tonight for guard duty at the bivouac site. As everyone is completely exhausted already, no one is in a good mood right now thinking about it. Here again we have mass punishment at work. It didn't matter that I woke up a half hour earlier than most people this morning, and was one of the first people downstairs. It doesn't matter - I still get the same crap. The mistakes of one are always the mistakes of everyone in BCT. In theory this is supposed to foster an environment of teamwork and camraderie, but until it "clicks", it mostly causes animosity amongst the platoon.

What bothers me is that there are still a lot of people who can't get their shit together. The Drill Sergeants will explicitly tell us what is expected of us - where we need to be, what time we need to be there, what uniform we need to be wearing, and what gear we need to have with us. Nevertheless, there are always several people who forget something, and it's usually the same folks all the time. The Drill Sergeants have inferred that today's military is suffering because of the lower standards for recruits. I don't know if this is where the problem stems, but I have noticed a big difference in the level of discipline between my first and second experiences in basic training.

...

I have a few minutes to write. It is almost dinner time, and MREs again since we are in the field. The road march to the bivouac site at RED STX kicked my ass. The distance wasn't very long - 2 or 3 miles, but we were carrying what was probably 60 lbs. of gear, and the pace was very fast. I almost fell out at the end, but I held up in spite of the difficulty. We are going to be doing a lot more marching, so hopefully I will be ready for the back-to-back ~6.8 and 9+ mile road marches we'll have later on.

We have our hooches set up in the field, and ready for bed later on. Each battle buddy contributes their poncho, which is snapped to the other person's poncho. Four stakes, some 550 cord, and six tent poles later, a primitive shelter is erected. The hooches have no floors nor mosquito netting and are far from weather-proof, but it's all we have. It is supposed to rain tonight, of course. We're just hoping for light rain at this point - otherwise this could be a very miserable experience. The cadre here are sleeping in modern tents with modern equipment such as battery-powered lanterns, radios, etc. I know after this kind of bivouac we will all appreciate such modern luxuries some day.

I had a dispute earlier with White over how to properly erect a tent. I've been camping for almost twice as long as this girl has been alive, and she was trying to order me around. She actually said that the tent should be loose at the bottom with the ponchos lying on the ground "to keep the ants out". Oh boy. I finally had to walk away from her before I snapped. I told White that she was in charge of the tent erection. I have been trying to work on improving our relationship, but sometimes it is really difficult.

Well, almost time to go. Dinner is almost over, and the sun is beginning to set. The temps are dropping quickly.

#76 - Basic rifle marksmanship

2006-02-10T09:10:00.000-05:00

I am out at one of the rifle ranges as I write. We learned the range procedures this morning, and are waiting for the busses to arrive. It has been very cold this morning - probably in the 30s, and we aren't wearing jackets. The Drill Sergeants finally let us put on our polypro underwear after the sun came up and it warmed up a little - go figure.

Last night there was a surprise barracks inspection. The Drill Sergeants found all kinds of "contraband" hidden in the ceiling tiles and peoples' lockers. One girl had two cell phones, whole MREs, soda bottles, racy brassieres, sex manuals (!), a fictional sex/romance novel, and... um, a vibrator. I'm sure her face must have been red when the male DSs found that stash in her sock drawer. The platoon she belonged to had their guidon duct-taped with a telephone handset to signify their shame. We were all hoping they would have duct-taped the vibrator to the guidon instead. Now THAT would have been funny!

My battle buddy, White, is on her way to sick call again. Luckily some other folks in my platoon are helping me carry her gear. She goes pretty often, and I am stuck carrying around her rifle, IBA, kevlar, rucksack, etc. It is nice when people pitch in to help. I try to return the favor whenever I can. There is a fine balance, however, as some folks will ask the world of you if they feel they can get away with it. One of the females in my platoon asked me last night to make her bed for her. I told her that I would show her how to make a hospital corner and how to properly make the bed, but that she had to do it (she has been having other people do the work for her). She was visibly disappointed that I would not comply. Oh well.

We had MREs again for lunch today. I had a milkshake for the first time - something new in the MREs. It was actually pretty good. It was supposed to be a chocolate flavor, but it didn't really taste like it. I miss the real deal. I miss a lot of things!

It is now the afternoon, and we just finished shooting at the EST 2000 range. This is the indoor computerized range simulation. It realistically mimics the kick of an M-16, and you shoot at images projected on a big screen... it's pretty cool. It took me a few rounds to adequately group my shots, but I did it. The cadre member in charge of the range would not let me adjust my sandbags, so I was in a bit of an uncomfortable prone throughout the session.

This indoor range is something new since I was at basic the first time. A lot of things are actually new since then. Perhaps the Army is catching up to the times. I wish the rest of the equipment was the same. We still have the antiquated old school pistol belts, rucksacks and LBEs that have been around forever. If we ever run out, there are probably some hanging around in the museum on post that we could borrow... ;p

I will have to remember to bring my writing material with me more often, as sometimes I have down time like this during the day. Many people complain about not having any time to write letters, but I've found some time to write every single day that I've been here... only sometimes you have to get creative about seizing the opportunity to do so. Everyone has heard about the Army way of "hurry up and wait". Sometimes we will be rushed somewhere in a tremendous hurry, only to sit on our asses for an hour afterwards. Other times I just have a few minutes here and there while one group is receiving instruction, and I am waiting my turn... These are all good times to pull a small notebook out of my pocket and write. The fringe benefit is that it also keeps me from getting bored, and helps the time to pass more quickly.

I was just sent outside the EST 2000 range with Jackman to guard the weapons. We left our "real" M-16s outside. She was falling asleep indoors so the Drill Sergeant lobbed a kevlar at her and yelled "Incoming!". Actually I'm surprised that more people didn't fall asleep inside the range, as the lights are very dim. It's like being in a movie theater, except for the staccato rhythm of the simulated M-16s firing.

The weather has still been cold. It is actually a bit colder than when we first arrived at Reception, usually in the 20s or 30s in the morning for PT and our first formation. In the day it has been going up to the 40s or 50s, and sometimes warmer, although there is often a chilly wind. I am very aware of the weather here since we are usually ill-prepared for it in terms of dress. The Drill Sergeants dictate what we wear at all times. If you are cold, you cannot just put on a jacket like you do in the civilian world. Most of the time it seems like we are freezing our asses off. I suspect that they might be toughening us up.

There are a number of people still inside the EST 2000 range having trouble qualifying. We are scheduled to go to a real live-fire range on Monday. Tomorrow is our first overnight bivouac or FTX (field training exercise), also known as "Red STX" (pronounced red sticks). It is going to be very cold.

I'd like to write a little about my platoon... There seem to be a good mix of all types of folks imaginable, and just about every race represented. Unfortunately there are only a few people that I like enough to seek out on a frequent basis. Most of the girls that I bonded with are in other platoons, though I still occasionally get to talk to them in the barracks.

A lot of the people don't have anyone who is coming to see them graduate, for various reasons - sometimes financial. I feel very thankful that my husband is planning to come from Pennsylvania to see me. I think about the prospect of graduation every day. It is still far off, but always on my mind.

We're sitting around now, and just had some A-rats outside (this refers to hot food from the DFAC served from insulated containers). For some reason we were served this outside the barracks. I told my battle buddies to not drink the purple kool-aid, but they didn't get the Jim Jones reference. I guess that was before their time...

#75 - Fit to Win and the gas chamber!

2006-02-09T16:46:00.000-05:00

Today we are scheduled to go through the... drum roll... gas chamber! I am nervous to be going through it again, so I've been trying not to dwell on the thought. I was issued an ill-fitting protective mask instead of one in my size. I'm hoping to have it swapped out before we go in.

It is now evening, and I have time to look back at the day's events. This morning we had to complete something called the "Fit to Win" course. This consisted of running through obstacles such as low crawling through concrete pipes, climbing over monkey bars, jumping over walls, and climbing up and down a cargo net. My battle buddy had the misfortune of falling down right in front of me from the cargo net. She fell from a height of at least 9' up, and smacked herself unconcious on the ground. It was actually pretty scary. The cadre members in the area immediately ran over and tried to get her to respond. I accompanied her to the hospital. It seems that she is ok now, and just knocked herself silly - nothing that she won't be able to recover from. She did give everyone a good scare when she was knocked out. Some people thought that maybe she had broken her neck. Many of the people in my platoon gathered around and began praying for her. Even though everyone has their squabbles, it showed that they are able to come together when necessary.

I was able to come back from the hospital in time for the gas chamber in the afternoon. I missed most of the morning's training, which wasn't a big deal, since I remembered all about clearing and sealing a pro mask from my prior BCT experience. I was in the first group to go into the chamber, while the CS gas was nice and potent. The experience sucked, plain and simple, but I tried my best to regain my composure and not panic. A few people inside tried to run for the door, and one girl passed out. There was a guy from my platoon next to me, normally someone we think of as being a big, tough guy. He was really panicking: "Something's wrong with me! I can't breathe! I can't breathe!" Yeah, no shit sherlock. None of us could breathe in there. You weren't alone in the experience.

We started out with our masks on, then had to break the seal around our mouths to tell the DSs our name and social security number. After we proved that we could reseal the masks, we kept them on for a little while. Then everyone had to take the entire mask off and recite either the Soldier's Creed or the Army Song. Or should I say, they tried to. It usually sounded something like this...

"I am an American... *cough cough cough* soldier!
*cough cough* I am *cough* *hack* *cough* a warr-- *cough* *cough* *cough*
and a *cough* *cough* *choke* *gasp* *cough* member *cough* *cough* *cough*
*uncontrollable coughing and flailing about while mucus flows everywhere*

DS: "OK soldier, that's enough. Exit the chamber."

All in all, I think we had the entire mask off for 30 seconds. That paled in comparison with my first time through the gas chamber where we had our masks off for several minutes. During that first experience, someone actually tried to punch out a Drill Sergeant in their haste to make it for the door, and we had to stay in for a long time. This 2nd trip through was not pleasant, but it was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

What does it feel like in the gas chamber? Breathing in CS gas is a real treat. Your nostrils, throat and lungs are on fire, as is all of your exposed skin. You feel like you are burning up. Mucus flows readily from your nostrils, maybe your mouth too. Your eyes tear up, and it is hard to see. It is not uncommon for folks to vomit. I heard about someone who soiled their pants from the stress. You feel like you just can't breathe, and you strain desperately for the next breath of cleansing, refreshing air, but it never comes. There is only another horrible breath of black smoke to take in, and you begin coughing uncontrollably. One can only imagine what a fish out of water feels like while it is flapping on the ground. The worst of it is feeling like you are suffocating. Many people begin to panic. They flail about wildly, turn to the next person for help... but that next person is suffering too. They then turn to the cadre members in the chamber (who are wearing pro masks), hoping for a bit of mercy. "Please, let me out!" they plead in their minds (it's often in their minds, as they can't always vocalize what they want to say between all the bouts of coughing and choking). Time in the gas chamber passes slowly. Each second seems like a minute, or maybe an hour. The important thing is not to panic. No matter how bad it gets, you can't just run for the door. If you try to leave before you are permitted, you will be forced to go through the gas chamber again, and will probably have to stay in even longer. It is best to just suck it up for the time you have to be in there, and wait until you are instructed to leave. Think of it as a character-building experience. Most folks who have been in the military will joke about their gas chamber experience later on.

Once outside the gas chamber, you are instructed to hold your pro mask in one hand, and the kevlar in another, waving your arms up and down. This actually helps to shake of the remaining CS gas on your clothing. You are made to walk around for several minutes while still shaking your arms up and down. The Drill Sergeants tell you to not rub your eyes nor touch your skin, which could intensify the effects of the CS. You are usually drooling like an idiot, and still coughing, or maybe vomiting. You take in all the fresh air that you can. Your lungs and skin are still burning a bit, but with time, the discomfort lessens. Within a few minutes you are fine, and it seems like you never went into the chamber at all, other than the stench of CS remaining on your clothing and gear.

Some of the following photos are of people in my company coming out of the chamber. I am in the first photo. You can tell from the expressions on everyone's faces what a fun time it was for all. Note the cadre member cracking up in the second photo. I would probably be laughing too!

Tomorrow we are scheduled to go to the rifle range to learn procedures, and then are going to be learning to fire on an indoor computer simulation (sounds interesting). On Friday we are having a longer road march and overnight bivouac.

One of the things that makes me a little nervous here is something we'll have to do later in BCT called a convoy live fire. Fourteen soldiers will ride around in the back of a truck, firing their M-16s while the truck is moving. You will be verrry close to the person next to you while you are firing. A simulated IED will go off, and half the truck will dismount the vehicle while the remainder are still firing at targets. Then the other seven will jump off and engage targets. The Drill Sergeants have told us that this will be, by far, the most dangerous thing we'll have to do at basic training. From what I have seen of many people's inability here to follow simple instructions, it does make me a little nervous. Good thing I took out $400,000 of life insurance coverage... just in case!

#74 - Night infilitration course

2006-02-08T14:36:00.000-05:00

I have fire guard duty (again!) and some time to write. We finished the night infiltration course. This was physically exhausting, but not as traumatic as a lot of people expected it to be. We had to crawl a few hundred meters at the low crawl through a sand course around obstacles while gun fire and artillery went off around us. I also received an ass-chewing by another platoon's Drill Sergeant because I had trouble getting my earplugs to stay in.

I am not enamored of this particular Drill Sergeant. Last night he had CQ duty and sounded the door alarms all night in the barracks for no reason other than interrupting everyones' sleep. It seems that there are two types of Drill Sergeants here: those who genuinely care about training soldiers, and those who have sought the position for a power trip.

Yesterday we spent time working on our firing positions for the M-16, as the rifle range is coming up soon. It is difficult to comfortably fire while wearing the IBAs. We didn't have to wear these when I went through basic the first time.

It seems that every day here is fraught with pain, being uncomfortable, sleep deprived, stressed, or otherwise generally miserable. I know that this is how BCT is supposed to be, yet I pray that the remaining weeks pass quickly. I can't wait to get out of this place.

#73 - Two weeks in BCT

2006-02-07T03:00:00.000-05:00

We began our day with running 30-60s (six reps). I think running will get a little easier with time.

Then we had a motor movement (bus ride) to the bayonet assault course, which was quite exhausting. Our 1SG made us run it two times because we weren't "motivated" enough. This course consisted of running up a hill, climbing over walls, jumping over pits, crawling on your back under barbed wire (which is harder than it sounds), walking on a balance beam, and other such fun, all while wearing the full battle rattle and stabbing things with the bayonet on the business end of the M-16. Before that we practiced on a shorter course. I beat myself up pretty well physically and busted my finger, whacked my shin, and aggravated my right knee, which has already been bothering me. If I wasn't so "motivated" I probably wouldn't have hurt myself in the process.

Afterwards we had a pugil stick competition. My helmet was way too loose, and as a result I set myself up to be injured. The girl I was fighting with, Pvt. Jackman, pummelled me in the head so hard that I started to cry. I think it was almost a concussion, as I saw stars! She felt bad and didn't want to continue the fight, but the Drill Sergeants wouldn't let us stop. I was subsequently pummelled in the head four more times. The pain was so incapacitating that my platoon mates had to help me remove my equipment when it was over. Sometimes I feel like the Army is toughening me up, but then there are times like this when I feel like a huge wuss!

Today is supposed to be a barracks inspection with some brass checking us out. Apparently our barracks did not pass the white glove inspection with the Drill Sergeant on CQ duty last night. Yes, it was like a white glove test, as the DS was actually running his hand up along the tops of the door moldings to see if there was any dust. After our already long day, we were taken outside and smoked with "front-back-gos". The only good thing about being smoked in the dark is that they can't always see if you are really doing flutter kicks...lol. Hey, I do them most of the time, but when muscle failure sets in after doing them for a half hour, any little break you can get is welcomed.

We were also unceremoniously woken up during the night by a female lieutenant and a DS because one of the fire guards was wearing their gray PT shirt under their ACU top. Mass punishment is often meted out for one person's infraction. I am so tired today. I could really have used the sleep, as we have a full day of physical training coming up, followed by the night infilitration course. This is where we get to crawl several hundred meters under live rounds, while artillery is also going off, simulating a real battlefield environment. Sounds like a lot of fun! Crawling even a few meters with the IBA flak jacket, LCE, kevlar, and weapon is bad enough... I can't wait to do it for such a long distance.

#72 - Front! Back! Go!

2006-02-06T02:22:00.000-05:00

I am on fire guard right now (the 02:00-03:00am shift). Luckily I will be able to write a bit since it is Sunday. This is our only real day of rest, and everyone always looks forward to this day of the week.

We finally began receiving mail yesterday. I was elated to get nine letters from my husband. Reading his words of encouragement was an incredible boost in morale.

I sent my husband home a photograph of me holding an M-16. There was a photographer when we went to the Shoppette who was taking pictures for a few dollars.

The M-16 rarely leaves our side. We carry it with us wherever we go, even to PT and inside the chow hall. It used to feel heavy in my hands, but it is starting to become a little easier to carry. I suppose that means I must be toughening up.

We have about another week here before we enter into white phase - that is, if everyone is squared away. At that point we should be able to (in theory) have phone calls every weekend.

Yesterday we had our first PT assessment at basic. We woke at 4:00am and had a 1:1:1 assessment (I thought it should have been a 2:2:2). I did 17 situps, 24 pushups, and the mile run in 10:05. For me, the run was rather unpleasant. I still have a long way to come as far as my running goes. However, being "old" means that the standards I will have to meet for our final PT test in basic training aren't that bad. As a 34-year old female, I will have to do nine pushups, 34 situps, and the 2-mile run in 23:06. The younger kids think that these numbers are a joke, as some guys are doing 70+ situps and pushups, and run times of less than 15:00.

I was relieved of my platoon guide position yesterday, as well were the assistant PG and squad leaders. One of the Drill Sergeants took Newman (the APG) and me on the side and almost apologetically said that they wanted to give other people a chance to take on leadership roles, and it had nothing to do with us personally. He thought that we had, in fact, been doing an excellent job. Since then folks in my company have been telling me that they miss hearing the sounding off in the DFAC, and having me as PG. Of course I am happy to not have to worry about keeping track of 50 people anymore, plus I get more time to eat since I won't always be the last in line. I didn't mind being in a leadership position per se, I just had enough of the stress while in BCT... being here is stressful in itself.

Our Drill Sergeants gave us some "homework" yesterday. We had to come up with a list of the five best soldiers and the five worst soldiers in our platoon. He read everyone's selections out loud. I was uncomfortable participating in such a task. I felt bad for my battle buddy, White, as she consistently made the lists of 5 worst soldiers. She was perceived as being slow, unmotivated, and a few other things that I can't mention on a blog. I felt bad for the girl, as it must have been publically humiliating. I later accompanied her to the Drill Sergeant so she could be counseled over some of her infractions. I think she is going to make an honest effort to improve her behavior in the future. On a positive note, I was shocked to find that I was on the five best soldiers list for many of my peers. Apparently I must be doing something right?

Generally, first platoon has been doing much better than the other three platoons in the company. The rumor is that we are poised to have a good chance at making honor platoon later in the cycle. We will see.

Unfortunately we have been in the hot seat because of the mistakes that the rest of the company has been making. Someone in one of the other platoons was caught stealing MREs, and a relationship was discovered between two people (their love notes were found by a Drill Sergeant). Each of the platoons has a guidon bearer who carries the phase banner in front (right now it is a red flag as we are still in red phase - next comes white, and then blue). The platoon with the lovebirds had their phase banner rolled up, and the incriminating love letter duct-taped to the flag so that they could be publically shamed.

Actually the 1SG decided to punish everyone in the company, and all platoons later had to roll up their phase banners, a mark of disgrace. The entire company was smoked last night out in the dark, int he cold and mud - not a lot of fun. It lasted for over an hour. This was while wearing those horribly bulky 30 lb. flak vests and a 2-qt. canteen. The worst exercise, by far, is "front-back-gos", AKA "grass drills". This entails having to do pushups (front!) following by flutter kicks (back!) and running in place (go!) while holding your arms extended out in front of you. Imagine the Drill Sergeant yelling "Front! Back! Go!" at various intervals. Most everyone was feeling pretty bad by the end of it, and we were all covered with mud from head to toe. I used to get smoked like that nearly every day when I went through BCT a decade ago, though, so I knew it could be a lot worse. The smokings meted out now pale in comparison to what new soldiers had to go through. I've been telling that to some of the folks in my platoon, but they still think we have it bad now. They have no idea...

...

I just finished breakfast, participated in some "barracks maintenance" (GI cleaning party), cleaned my boots, and am now guarding the M-16 rifle rack, which means more time to write! I paid a girl $2.00 to wash my socks and underwear. Fort Jackson has a (mandatory) laundry service which picks up twice a week, but I won't send my socks and underwear there again. They affix adhesive laundry tags to everything which are quite difficult to remove.

I've been sick with a cold ever since I got to Reception on January 17th, as have most people here. The Army wants everyone to be clean and illness-free, and tells us we have to use hand sanitizer before meals in the DFAC. However, we are often ordered to do things like a police call where you pick up trash with your bare hands, and then have to stick it in your pockets until later since there are no trash bags or dumpster nearby. And then we will stand outside in formation for a half hour or more in 20-degree weather without a coat or gloves. Being here is an exercise in contradictions.

When it is cold out, sometimes people forget themselves and will put their hands in their pockets. The Drill Sergeants disparingly call this "Air Force gloves". ;p

Yesterday we began bayonet training. This involves affixing a bayonet to the end of the M-16, and going through various positions to attack the enemy, such as "Butt stroke to the groin... move!" During most of the moves, we must scream "Kill kill kill!!"

DS: "What makes the grass grow?"
"Blood, blood, Drill Sergeant!"
DS: "What makes the grass greener?"
"Guts, guts, Drill Sergeant!"

Bayonet training was much as I remembered it from BCT the first time. We should be going to the actual course soon.

...

It is about 7 in the evening. We spent about four hours out on a detail picking up trash and pine cones. I wouldn't have minded the work if we were allowed to dress appropriately for the weather. We had no coats nor gloves on, and it was probably in the 40s with strong winds, maybe even colder than that.

There is currently a lot of drama unfolding in my company. One of the females told a Drill Sergeant that someone stole her laundry. All of the females were called outside and nearly received a bad smoking. At the last moment, it was discovered that her laundry was actually still in one of the dryers in the laundry room. There was another incident where a girl from another platoon threw someone's laundry across the floor. One girl was black, and the other was white, and somehow the thing turned into a racial incident. Just about every night there is some kind of screaming match in the female bay, and someone holding back a girl who is threatening to punch another one out.

Next week we are going to be kept fairly busy. We have a visit to the dreaded gas chamber, the pugil stick competition, another road march (wearing these IBAs/flak jackets, kevlars, LBEs with canteens, ammo belts, etc. and a full ruck sack, and carrying the M-16). It sucks to tote around all this gear. I miss my ultralight hiking gear from home. If I don't come out of this experience being very fit, something is horribly wrong. Though I made it through basic training once before, I've wimped out considerably since then. That much has become apparent...lol.

Uh oh. The cacophony in my bay has resumed. Sounds like another fight is about to break out. Who knew that females could be so cantankerous? Yikes!

#71 - Land navigation

2006-02-03T20:45:00.000-05:00

I only have a few minutes to write. It is the early morning, and I am on fire guard duty. I spent about 40 minutes trying to figure out who was missing from our bay. We are supposed to keep accountability, but many of the people just go through the motions. This task burned up much of my alloted letter-writing time.

This morning I participated in our first ability group run. We ran for about 1 1/2 miles. I am happy to report that I did not fall out, as tempting as the prospect was. I struggled a bit in the back of the formation, but I finished with everyone. At least 1/4 of the folks in my run group fell out. I'm hoping that I can continue to hang in there, as I would love to improve on my running.

Today we had classes on map reading. Since this is something I have a lot of experience with, I ended up helping out a lot of folks in my platoon. We have the land navigation course coming up where we will be tasked with making our way to several points in the woods. I'm looking forward to it. I'm a little worried about my battle buddy knowing what to do, as she slept through most of the map reading class... but I'll help her out as much as I can.

...

Right now I'm out at the land navigation course waiting for my turn. My battle buddy is in charge of holding the compass, and I am keeping the pace. Honestly this stuff is easy for me, since I have been engaged in "land nav" for the past 12 years as an archaeologist. Speaking of archaeology, the Drill Sergeants have told us that there are archaeological sites out here bounded by white tape that we need to avoid. One of the moderators of my website was involved in a cultural resource survey here. I wonder if he was involved in recording any of these sites? I'll have to try not to be distracted by what is around me. Right about now I really miss what I do for a living at home.

...

It is now just before bedtime, and I have a few minutes to write. Our land navigation went fine, and my battle buddy did well. I told her that I was proud of her. She drives me crazy sometimes, but in general, our relationship is beginning to improve.

During our time in the woods, we passed a number of the aforementioned archaeological sites. From what I was able to tell, there were a number of historic scatters likely associated with early to mid 20 century training activities at Fort Jackson - nothing very old. The DSs told us to avoid the marked archaeological sites - at least they are taking care of the base's cultural resources.

Today we were issued our IBAs, which were quite heavy (close to 30 lbs. with the plates). These are the modern version of flak jackets, and are bulky and cumbersome to wear. We were also issued our protective (gas) masks. Oh joy. I'm not very enthused about my return to the gas chamber, which is supposed to happen in another week or two. I had soooo much fun the first time around!

We were also introduced to the low crawl. This is a maneuver where you pull your prostrate body along the ground with your face in the dirt. You are supposed to make as low as a silhouette as possible so you don't draw the enemy's fire. We also practiced the high crawl, which is a little easier, but still uncomfortable. We've only moved a few meters doing these, and these maneuvers are absolutely exhausting. I know with time we will have to do this for a far greater distance.

Still waiting to receive mail. We're all anxiously waiting to hear from our loved ones at home...

#70 - Ah, the fun

2006-02-01T20:38:00.000-05:00

No mail yet here - maybe by the end of the week. The Drill Sergeants told us that it can sometimes take up to 2 weeks to receive mail once you ship downrange to BCT from Reception. Being cut off from the rest of the world is tough. God, I miss the internet!

Today we had several classes on first aid. In one of the classes we were shown how to jam a large tube down someone's nostril to open their breathing passage. This tube was much larger than the diameter of a nostril - I'd say at least 2 or 3 times as big, and about 8" long. The instructor told us that we had to practice on each other and jam the tube up one another's nostrils. We looked at him like he was crazy. One of the girls started putting a tube up my nose, and my eyes began to tear at the pain, and the prospect of what I was going to endure. Honestly I felt like these people were nuts, and I was ready to bolt for the door. Another guy started jamming the tube up his battle buddy's nose, and he began bleeding from the nose all over the place. At this point, the instructor said, "I'm only kidding. You don't really have to put the tube in. It was only a joke." Real freakin' funny. I was not happy to be the brunt of his joke, but more ticked off that he let it go so far that people were actually injured.

We had MREs (Meals Ready to Eat) for the second time today in BCT. I like MREs because it is the only time I am not rushed (relatively speaking) while eating... and I don't have to sound off in the DFAC at the top of my lungs. On the plus side, I have been told that the Drill Sergeants have thus far been impressed by my level of motivation. I scream so loud that my voice cracks in the DFAC. It's surprising that I haven't lost my voice yet.

As platoon guide, I received a special arm patch today - basically a large version of a SFC insignia. The assistant platoon guide, Pvt. Newman, wears a SSG patch, and the four squad leaders have four small SGT lapel pins. We all feel very "special" to wear our insignias. I'll wear mine until I am "fired" from the position - whenever that may be. Thus far I've apparently been functioning well as platoon guide. Most of the PGs from the other platoons have been fired already.

Tomorrow is our first ability group run, and I'm a little nervous. I will try very hard not to fall out. Running is still my weakness, and there is so much room for improvement! Afterwards we are scheduled to receive a class on map reading and land navigation. At least this is something I am skilled at in the civilian world, so I have something to look forward to. If it's one thing I'm proficient at, it's finding my way through the woods with a map and a compass!

Well, have to run. Rumor has it that there is a er, um, rather unpleasant female Drill Sergeant from another company pulling CQ duty in our barracks tonight, so I should help to clean the bay...

#69 - Victory Tower

2006-01-31T15:04:00.000-05:00

This morning we completed our tactical road march, which was somewhere in the neighborhood of 4 miles roundtrip - not too bad. Our destination was Victory Tower. I rapelled down a 15' wall, a 60' wall, climbed a 60' ladder (part of it with a rope), scambered across several rope bridges, and climbed down a 70' cargo net. The last was the scariest obstacle, as my arms felt like rubber, and I was afraid that I was going to let go and fall to the ground.

While I was climbing across the ropes, I had the displeasure of watching one guy fall into the cargo net in a bad way. The Drill Sergeants had been harrassing him up to that point. He was in a hurry to make it across, and fell in such a way that his leg or foot was broken in the fall. Everything shut down while the paramedics came, and they had to actually winch him out of the cargo net on a stretcher. Our company's 1LT was also injured at Victory Tower while doing the rappel and had to be taken away by ambulance.

...

I am still hoping that it won't be too long before we are able to receive mail, as it would be a huge morale booster. The Drill Sergeants continue to tell everyone that they will be going to Iraq. Today we were shown a few dozen graphic photos of victims of roadside bombs. The photos were very upsetting, I will concede - seeing all manner of disfigurement, people missing heads, torsos ripped in half, mostly unrecognizeable hunks of jumbled flesh that once were a person. One girl in my platoon broke down and started crying hysterically when she saw the photos, and ran from the room. I have to admit that the photographs were really getting to most of us. It was just a rough day for many, physically and mentally exhausting.

#68 - Red Phase continues

2006-01-29T16:51:00.000-05:00

I was a little bummed today, as I sent my husband an anniversary card. This will be the first one I am missing. I've also missed his birthday too. :(

Today I was able to visit the Shoppette for the first time. It was truly the highlight of my week. One of the Drill Sergeants from another platoon was in the store, and was harrassing me about buying so much stationary and postcards. One of my DSs was there, and defended me, saying, "Leave her alone. She's our PG, and this soldier is squared away. She can buy as many postcards as she wants to." I guess it's good that the Drill Sergeant thinks well of me.

Today I had to accompany one of the females in my platoon, Pvt. Gallagos, as a battle buddy to see the Chaplain. This is the girl who tried to recently go AWOL.

We are preparing for our first tactical road march early tomorrow morning. It is just a few miles to Victory Forge. We will not be marching in a regular formation, but in a staggered one of two lines (one on each side of the road), carrying the M-16 at the low-ready position (barrel pointed towards the ground). We will be wearing Kevlar helmets, LBEs (load-bearing equipment, aka LCEs or load-carrying equipment) - basically the web strapping & pistol belts, 1-qt. canteens on each side, ammo pouches, etc. and one of those ancient-looking Army rucksacks. I am still having difficulty keeping in step with the regular marching since most of the people in the front refuse to take a 30-inch step. My legs are only so long. I could probably walk all day long, but it's almost impossible for me to keep in step with cadence taking such an exaggerated step.

This morning for PT we had our first experience running. We did shuttle sprints (running as fast as you can for short distances) and 30/60s (sprinting for 30 seconds, and jogging for 60 seconds). I believe there were six repetitions, so we ran or jogged for about nine minutes. Towards the end, I did walk a little bit, but I managed to hang in there. What troubled me was that my shins were beginning to hurt. They gave us less than 20 seconds to stretch beforehand. I will have to remember to stretch on my own before PT on run days, as I'm sure to hurt myself with this inadequate stretching. I believe we are to have our first ability group runs on Wednesday. Wish me luck!

#67 - First weekend at BCT

2006-01-29T16:22:00.000-05:00

It is Sunday, and I have some free time to write while I am doing laundry. I am feeling a little better today. This morning we were given the opportunity to attend church, but I declined, not choosing to follow the traditional organized religions. I told one of our Drill Sergeants that I had something of a personal relationship with God and simply wanted a quiet space to meditate while the others went to church. Today's military is all about political correctness and accomodating diversity, so I was granted the request (I'm not sure if this would have happened the first time around when I went through basic, as I used to get a lot of flack for wanting to meditate). I was able to sit in a quiet classroom and meditate. Or should I say, I tried to meditate, and I was mostly fending off sleep. I suppose my body is too deprived of rest at this point to effectively pull it off. One of my battle buddies, Pvt. Pear, from the platoon accompanied me, and she got a chance to catch up on letter writing during the process.

The weather has been mostly decent here, though it is cool and rainy this morning. Nevertheless, it's still a departure from the Pennsylvania winter and snow I left behind. Early in the mornings, we wear the following uniform for PT: short sleeve shirt, long sleeved shirt, sweatshirt, shorts, and sweatpants, with a greenish/grayish winter hat. The "winter PTs" are also called "the marshmallow suit" by some people. It is still in the 20s or 30s in the morning, but warms up during the day. Otherwise, we're usually wearing ACUs without the BDU field jacket, and a patrol cap. Temperatures in the day have ranged in the 60s, but as it drops, it can get very cold standing in the last formation in our summer PTs.

Yesterday we had a class on unarmed hand-to-hand combat, or "modern Army combatives". I learned some interesting moves. We are supposed to have another class on this later on.

There are two girls that I know of in my company who are currently trying to get out of the Army. One apparently tried to go AWOL yesterday but was nabbed before she made it very far. There is a lot of discussion here in the laundry room about the various ways one could try to get out of the military. Most people are upset because the Drill Sergeants have been telling them that everyone will be going to Iraq. Really, I don't think this should come as a huge shock!

I've pretty must resigned myself to the fact that I'm going to stick this out, and finish what I've started. I've had more bad days so far than good, but I suppose that is to be expected. My mood is improving with time, as I'm beginning to feel more "normal" here and accustomed to the routine. I am slowly beginning to talk to more of the females in my platoon, and in my bay. I am not happy to be here, but it is getting a little bit easier.

I did get a chance to use the payphone again yesterday, but was unable to reach my husband. Our phone calls are few and far between, and the Drill Sergeants have told us that this will be the last phone call we are able to make while we are in "Red Phase". Some people who were unable to reach their families or significant others broke into tears, but there was no cadre member around this time to drop them for pushups for the trangression.

...

It is later in the day, and I've just finished working on a detail, even though this is supposed to be our "free" day. I spent time checking sizes on protective (gas) masks and assembling the elements of M-16 cleaning kits. I've also been making an attempt to organize my wall locker to meet inspection standards. Of course there is more stuff in here than seemingly will fit neatly, but I'm doing the best that I can.

I'm finding myself feeling down again. I wonder if this is what everyone is going through? I miss my husband horribly, and not being able to talk to him was a tremendous disappointment. I'm just trying to "suck it up and drive on", as the Drill Sergeants advise. Some of the others in my company are still doing their best to get out of the Army. One of the girls seems to be on the path to receiving a dishonorable discharge. She has already received two Article 15s. Earlier in the day she refused to follow the orders of a Drill Sergeant. There seem to be a lot of people devising strategies to try to get out... and we've only actually only been in BCT for less than a week now.

Earlier today, one of the girls in my platoon was giving me a hard time. She must have heard about my having many years of college, and was throwing it in my face. As platoon guide, I was having trouble counting everyone in my platoon, because they refused to cover down and kept shifting around in formation. This girl made a snide remark "This girl can't count. I guess anyone can get a college degree!" I confronted her in front of everyone and asked what her problem was, and she wouldn't back down. I told her that I wished she would get selected next for the position of PG so that she could also incur the wrath of the Drill Sergeants and have to deal with the stress of keeping accountability. I later found out that no one seems to like her in the platoon because of her attitude. To her credit, later she apologized to me.

...

I just returned from chow. If anyone in my family saw the way that I eat now, they would likely be appalled. Imagine pigs slopping up at a trough - that is an approximate characterization. I do not eat anything that requires cutting with a knife. For dinner, I chose noodles, a corn/bean mixture and an orange. I spent most of the alloted 2 minutes for dinner peeling the orange, and that was about all I was able to shove in my mouth. If I take any longer to eat, the Drill Sergeants immediately begin pressuring me to leave the DFAC. I know that I'm not eating enough, as my stomach is always rumbling with hunger, and my stool is at least 1/2 to 1/3 less of what it was before, maybe even less. If I don't come out of this having lost a lot of weight, I will be stunned.

Tomorrow, or possibly later today, we are going to the PX/Shoppette - the highlight of my week. How sad is it that an opportunity to purchase such items as Baby Wipes inspires such excitement for me. Something is wrong with the showers in the barracks, and there is only ice cold water, so having Baby Wipes would help alleviate our misery.

I will tell you a little about my platoon's Drill Sergeants (names changed to protect the guilty?). I believe my platoon lucked out in having the three best DSs of all the platoons in the company. DS Pontiff is a bit of a hardass, and a combat veteran with lots of Hooooah experience. DSs Tora and Nobliss are more easy-going. All of them are activated Reservists from Florida. We seem to get smoked less often than the other platoons. One of the platoons has a DS so tough that many of the girls come upstairs into the barracks crying after they've had a formation.

DS Nobliss is a medic, and since he believes that personal hygiene is important, told us that we have permission to take showers after lights out if we need to. Being able to do that makes a huge difference. Imagine 99 females in two bays, usually only about 20-35 minutes of "personal time" each night, and very few showers to go around. We're not allowed to change in our rooms (which have no doors), so everything has to be done in the latrines. Also imagine 99 females whose menstrual cycles are beginning to coincide, and the prospect of everyone PMSing at the same time...lol.

I'm in the barracks now, and a fistfight has almost broke out for about the third time today amongst the females. Holy crap. You wouldn't believe some of the drama that goes on here - it's amazing.

Next week we have our first road march, and Victory Tower. The latter entails crossing a number of rope bridges, ropes, and rapelling down a 60' wall. I know I'm probably going to fall off the ropes, but at least there is a cargo net to fall into. Victory Forge was around the first time I went through basic, and that was my experience then. ;> I am actually looking forward to the rappel.

Wow, another fight almost broke out in the hallway. This place is a madhouse.

Well, at least some of the girls in my bay seem to be bonding, and generally, it is getting better. The one chink in the armor is my battle buddy, White. She keeps leaving her stuff strewn about our room, and my bunk continues to get tossed because of her crap (she is on the top bunk, and I am the bottom, and the Drill Sergeants do not differentiate when she leaves stuff on the bed).

Unfortunately some of the females here are having some personal hygiene issues. I don't understand why anyone would not want to take a shower here... even with the cold water.

#66 - The first few days of BCT

2006-01-28T23:39:00.000-05:00

I finally have time to write a little, as I'm on CQ duty right now (CQ stands for Charge of Quarters. There is always a Drill Sergeant on duty each evening that is in charge of the soldiers in the barracks, and usually two soldiers on duty manning the CQ desk at any given time). It seems that I have some type of duty every other night, taking precious time away from the little sleep we already receive. Thus far I have been successful in staying awake for the classes we've been given during the day, though others have been mercilessly smoked for not being able to. One of the favorite modes of punishment is the "overhand clap".

I was supposed to receive a 2-minute phone call today and had planned on calling my husband, but the line was long and we ran out of time before I could make my call. It was a disappoinment. Hopefully I'll have another chance to call tomorrow. Our company's 1LT was dropping people who came off the payphones crying after talking to their relatives at home. They were made to do 20 pushups for showing such emotion.

The barracks I am staying in here are newer than what I previously encountered when I went through BCT the first time. We stay in a long, brick building with three floors, one of offices and classrooms, and a male and female floor (with about 100 soldiers on each). Each bay (room) on the floors sleeps about 8 soldiers. Sadly, I was assigned to a room with few people that I like, and they seem to be very loud and messy. I already had my bunk tossed twice by the Drill Sergeants because my assigned battle buddy left her crap lying around. We were also smoked because the girls couldn't help themselves from talking after light's out.

I haven't bonded at all with my battle buddy, Pvt. White (all names of folks in my platoon changed for this blog). I miss the other girls that I was beginning to form friendships with at Reception. Only one or two of them are in my platoon, though there are also some folks here elsewhere on the floor in other platoons. Some of the people I was with ended up being assigned to other basic training companies in our battalion.

We had PT (physical training) this morning for the first time, and it wasn't that bad. Actually, being able to do PT was a welcome relief, as we were not allowed to engage in physical training while we were in Reception. I am still nervous about being able to pass the run for the 2:2:2 assessment. Right now I'm having difficulty keeping up with marching. Being short does not help! The squad leaders are supposed to be taking 30-inch steps, but they do not. I shudder to think what is going to happen on a long road march.

The first few days here have consisted of practicing drill and ceremony (marching). We were also issued our M-16s and must carry them with us wherever we go. At night, they are locked up in a rifle rack in the barracks, and we must retrieve them first thing in the morning. Carrying the M-16s at the position of port arms quickly becomes tiresome, as they weight around 7 1/2 lbs.

I have been assigned the role of Platoon Guide (PG) by the Drill Sergeants for 1st platoon, the "Nightstalkers". One of the responsibilities I have is to keep accountability of the 50 people in the platoon at all times, no easy task. I am secretly hoping to be relieved of this position soon. Very few people listen to me, as they are always arguing amongst themselves on how best to do any given task. As PG, I have also been assigned a very embarrassing task of "sounding off" when my platoon is in the DFAC for chow. Picture the following scenario:

Our platoon has gone through the line for chow, and everyone except for me is seated, and quickly eating their meal. As PG, I am always the last person to go through the line. I bring my tray of food and glass of punch to the table, unsling my weapon, and place it under the table. Facing the Drill Sergeants, who are seated at another table, I come to the position of attention, and begin to scream as loud as humanly possible:

"DRILL SERGEANT!!!"

The platoon: "What?!?!"

"I am the last hiiiiiiiiighly motivated..."

The platoon: "What?!?!"

"Hiiiiiiighly dedicated..."

The platoon: "What?!?!"

"Nightstalker!!!!!!"

The platoon: "Hooooooooooaaaahh!!!" until I take my seat and begin eating

Since I am the last person to receive my food, I only get about 2 minutes to wolf it all down. When I am finished, I also have to yell out, "Last Nightstalker!". At that point, everyone in my platoon must be finished with their meal, and have to leave the DFAC. I have been drawing the ire of my platoon by eating "too quickly" during this process. I'm always the last person to come inside and eat, but I still manage to finish too quickly. Honestly, I think I'm half-starving myself by being PG, as I shovel food in my mouth in a period of under 2 minutes, and choose whatever is the easiest to chew and swallow.

Breakfast is usually scrambled eggs and grits. Lunch and dinner is rice and some varient of a chicken-stew-like concoction, or beans and chili. If I'm lucky, I'm able to grab a yogurt. That's about it. Not a lot of variety in my diet at this point.

We had a class today on proper feminine hygiene (for the females only, obviously!). Gauging from the questions posed at the end of the class, it was apparent that it was needed for some of these people. We've also received classes on topics such as the Army heritage, how pay works, and military justice. Tomorrow we are supposed to learn hand-to-hand combat. I'll feel better, I suppose, if we do something physical, though I suspect I'll have my ass thoroughly kicked. A lot of the females here seem to be pretty tough.

We were just able to send out mail for the first time since arriving at BCT. I know I'll be happy when I am finally able to receive letters from the outside world.

#65 - A few observations

2006-01-26T23:37:00.000-05:00

I have a few minutes to write, as I am on fire guard duty in the barracks for the second time at BCT.

I found out my mailing address, and was able to give this information to my husband.

As of this writing, I'm in a horrible state of sleep deprivation. Last night I was mistakenly woken not once, but twice, for a fire guard shift. To compound my misery, unbeknownest to me, my locker door was sticking. I thought I had secured my locker, but I woke to the sound of a female Drill Sergeant gleefully tossing out all of the contents of my locker in the middle of the night. I groggily awoke and stuffed everything back inside. You know that will never happen again.

In BCT, it's generally best to blend in and not stand out. That will not be possible for me, as I was today named the platoon guide (PG) by the 1st platoon Drill Sergeants. *groan*

Many things are different this time around in BCT, but I've found that the experience still generally sucks. We are in newer barracks. We already got smoked several times by the DSs for minor infractions. There are a litany of items I can complain about, but I'll save my energy for another time. I can barely stay awake for this fire guard shift, so I need every ounce of it.

#64 - Arrival at BCT

2006-01-26T09:42:00.000-05:00

Today we shipped downrange to our basic training unit. I was assigned to the 1st platoon of my new unit, a few miles away on Fort Jackson.

We began by lining up with our duffel bags and civilian bags, and marching up a hill to board white busses. Our Drill Sergeants met us at Reception and accompanied us to our basic training units. I know everyone was scared to be riding the busses. When we arrived at our destination, we were told to get off the busses, now! There was a lot of yelling and "hurry ups" as people struggled to carry all of their luggage with them. The one recruit nicknamed "Barbie" seemed to have it the worst, as she had a full complement of civilian luggage with her... at least 4 suitcases!

We carried the bags for what seemed like a long distance, and assembled in an open field that was sectioned off into areas with white tape. The Drill Sergeants had us line up by platoon order. We were given the task of lining up our bags in a particular way in alphabetical order. Of course no one was able to do it in the alloted time, and we were administered a relatively mild smoking each time. Eventually everyone was able to comply. The Drill Sergeants then introduced themselves, and were were issued canteens. All in all, this was not what I expected. The "shark attack" that I experienced during my first basic training almost 10 years ago never manifested. Today's Army BCT seems to be much kinder and gentler than it has been in the past.

We then proceeded with our bags to the company area, where we were divided by platoon. Here we had to undergo yet another shakedown, and dump the contents of our bags onto the ground. The Drill Sergeants called out a list of everything we were supposed to have, and everything else was supposed to be put away. Afterwards, we carried our civilian bags, which included anything "contraband" (i.e. civilian clothes, cell phones, electronics) and put them away into a locked closet in the barracks. We were then shown the rooms that we would be staying in for the next 9 weeks, and given information about what would be expected of us during our time in BCT. This turned out to be another long day, and we didn't get a lot of sleep that night.

#63 - Reception, day number 8!

2006-01-24T23:55:00.000-05:00

I am on front door guard duty in the barracks, and it's almost midnight. From our post at the front door we can see a bus in the distance dropping off new recruits. The people getting off the bus from the airport are all in the same position we were in back on January 17th... scared, and wondering why they ever enlisted in the Army. I feel bad for them.

We are supposed to ship from Reception to basic training on Wednesday at noon. My heart is already racing with dread at the thought of the Drill Sergeants' "shark attack" on the first day. I am with a group of very loud, undisciplined girls, and I know we're going to have the living hell smoked out of us. Tonight at light's out (9:00pm), one girl kept switching the lights on and off. She is a tall woman who has publicly bragged of her several prior arrests and is always threatening to beat people up. This same woman constantly talks in formation and refuses to listen. I am terrified of being stuck with her as my battle buddy in basic. I cannot even imagine how miserable an experience that would be. Anyone else would be better.

Today was a bit of a rough day for me emotionally. I think the stress is manifesting physically, as my stomach is always in pain, my head is pounding, my chest hurts, and I feel like throwing up. Honestly it comes as something of a surprise that this would already be affecting me so much physically and emotionally.

Nights are the worst. If they keep us busy during the day, it isn't so bad. However, when things settle down and they cut us loose for personal time, it gets a little rough. I am left alone with my thoughts, and that isn't always a good thing. I usually find myself feeling depressed about being here. The potential future deployment weighs heavily upon my mind, and I wonder how I could get through it.

#62 - Another day in purgatory, er Reception

2006-01-22T01:22:00.000-05:00

It is 1:00am and I am currently on fire guard duty (so much for the plans of sleep!). The only benefit for having a fire guard shift is the ability to write letters.

The problem females in my bay wouldn't quiet down again tonight at light's out (9pm). A few fistfights have nearly broken out between these girls at the end of the bay, and everyone else. Two Drill Sergeants appeared because they had heard the ruckus downstairs. It was only with their intervention that they finally settled down, and I was able to get some sleep. These girls are definately the blue falcons of Reception (blue falcon is a term which means the person who gets everyone in trouble or fails their fellow soldiers in some way... this term is also known as b.f., bravo foxtrot, or buddy f***er).

It has been interesting to see the mix of personalities present here. There is one girl nicknamed Barbie who always has frilly things (I don't know how she kept them through shakedown). Another of my female battle buddies is a 40 year old straight-A law student. There are the girls who are extremely quiet and shy, most of them small in stature, and looking appropriately mousy bedecked in their Army-issue birth control glasses. There are a few tall masculine women that I wouldn't want to rumble with in a fight. And there are the loud and obnoxious girls who are always quick to engage in verbal altercations. Almost everyone here is young... I would guess around 18 years old as the median age.

My second time going through basic training has differed so far significantly in two ways from the first experience nearly a decade ago. The first way is that I now have a considerable knowledge of the events that have been taking place in Reception. It seems that my ability to predict what is going to happen next is viewed as almost Nostradamus-like by some of the females. Little is a surprise, and much is the same - I think I might even be staying in the same Reception barracks that I did before. The uniforms issued this time are ACUs instead of BDUs. Shots are now dispensed individually with needles instead of the big needle gun used before. The civilians I've encountered working here are quite rude and seem to harbor ill will toward the recruits as a whole. Compared to my previous basic training experience, I've noticed more signage posted with things like "the Army Values" than before (I later found out that these were instituted right after I had finished basic training the first time).

A lot of the details are the same, but the big difference from my first experience here is that I've already made a number of friends in Reception. That didn't happen the first time around. There are probably about eight of us on my end of the bay in the barracks who always seek out each other's company and offer one another emotional support. I hope I am lucky enough to have some of these women in my platoon in basic, rather than some of the other girls. It feels like there is someone to lean on, and knowing these girls I actually feel like I have a shot at making it through this experience.

Today we labeled our Army-issue green duffle bags and laundry bags with black markers and stencils. I had to purchase a large black "Army of One" bag to hold anything that wouldn't fit in the duffel bag. Yesterday we received our ID tags, which made some of my platoon mates feel like they were really on the road to becoming soldiers.

The Drill Sergeants just came by during our fire guard shift. Apparently our response was well-received (they usually ask you questions like the three general orders or the Soldier's Creed), as we did not receive the ass-chewing that the previous shift did. The other girls on fire guard duty had their shirts hanging out of their pants, were slow in getting up when the Drill Sergeants walked in, and did not come to the position of parade rest when addressing the cadre. One of them didn't even recognize a Drill Sergeant as being such.

"Don't you think my funny hat is a clue to my being a Drill Sergeant?"

"Yes, Drill Sergeant!"

"So, you think my hat is funny then?!"

"No Drill Sergeant, er, um, I mean..."

#61 - Reception, day five... ugh

2006-01-21T23:34:00.000-05:00

I have a few minutes to write before we have to get ready for another formation. Just trying to finish some laundry now...

Yesterday was the dreaded shakedown. This was the second time we've had to dump all of our belongings onto the floor to be inspected by the Drill Sergeants. Of course, we were all jammed into an impossibly small space to do so, piled up onto the next person with no room to keep your gear separate. Somehow I ended up missing some uniform items (likely picked up by the people next to me during the shakedown), and will now have to purchase replacements. What a pain. Luckily I was able to keep 95% of the stuff I brought with me from home. I'm hoping they don't take anything else away from me when we ship downrange to basic training.

There is considerably more downtime in Reception than we will have in basic. We just finished doing laundry. I washed my clothes with some of the women that I've become buddies with. The cliques are already beginning to form. In my group are all the oldest women, and most of the mature and quiet younger girls. The loud, obnoxious variety reside on the other side of the bay. These other girls are always the slowest to come downstairs for formation, the ones who are always making noise when everyone is trying to sleep, and are often quite combative in disposition. I hope that my platoon is basic is comprised of the people I am already with, though anything can happen. There are three platoons of males, and one of females, so it's likely we'll end up with a roughly 75% male, 25% female mix.

So far the food has been pretty decent in the DFAC (dining facility) here in Reception. I am always the first one to finish eating, because I am training myself to eat at the speed that will be expected of me when we ship downrange to BCT. Many of the others are still leisurely picking at their food, spending time walking around the chow hall searching for specific condiments, and gabbing. The DFAC here is a lot more laid back than the DFACs at basic. These other folks are going to be in for a big shock very soon.

I'm feeling a little better today than the last few days, at least emotionally. I think actually getting something close to a full night's sleep was very helpful. Of course I'm hoping that I will not have fire guard duty again this evening.

Today I was able to use the payphone for less than 5 minutes to call my husband. We've only had the opportunity to use the phone once or twice in Reception, and the time goes very quickly. Unfortunately we do not know what our mailing addresses will be yet in basic training. Being cut off from communication with our loved ones and the outside world is difficult. I expect that we'll all have a boost in morale once we are finally able to receive mail on a regular basis.

Yesterday morning we received shots for TD, IPV, MGC, MMR, HEP B, PPD, and a Flumist syringe up the nostrils. The effect of said shots when existing the human body produces some interesting effects... enough said!

#60 - Frustrations

2006-01-20T23:10:00.000-05:00

Ah, the Army. Sometimes I wonder if I would have been better off enlisting in another branch (or not having enlisted at all). These thoughts are often brought upon by bouts of frustration with what is going on around me...

I am currently waiting to (possibly) have my birth control prescription re-prescribed by a military physician. I had to ask seven (!) times before the Drill Sergeants would allow me to come to the clinic (they said, "Soldier, that's not important." or "You won't need birth control in basic training.") It wasn't until I pulled the "woman card" and inferred to a male DS that I would bleed all over myself without the prescription that they would send me (hey, you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes to get results). Then when I was finally allowed to go, I was yelled at for not coming to the clinic sooner. *sigh*

Unfortunately I've run into a brick wall with trying to get this prescription refilled. It seems that my legitimate prescription is not good enough for the Army physicians, and unfortunately I have been unable to contact my doctor at home. Oddly enough, I've also been unable to reach him by telephone. Guess I won't have a chance to do this again for awhile. I will have to deal with having a messed up menstrual cycle through basic training...hooray.

This morning we lined up our duffel bags and civilian bags in preparation for shipping out to basic training. Everything is done very fast, orders from the Drill Sergeants executed with lightning speed, accompanied by a lot of screaming and yelling. The biggest problem I have here is not being able to understand what many of the NCOs are saying. Unfortunately many aren't very articulate, and to compound the confusion, some have heavy regional dialects. They often yell at us through the intercom in the barracks, and it sounds like the adults from the Charlie Brown cartoons a la "Wa wa wa wa... wa wa wa wa!" Every once in awhile you will catch a word, and piece together the context cues, hoping that you can assemble them like a puzzle and understand what is being asked of you.

Last night there was a disturbance in the barracks, in my bay. One of the female holdovers from the bay downstairs was apparently caught with one of the males, and someone told one of the Drill Sergeants. This is a different girl than the resident "platoon ho" that is usually caught up to no good. Afterwards, the female in question came into our bay while we were sleeping and began screaming at everyone for getting her in trouble. It was quite the scene. Thus far my stay in Reception has been characterized by similar public displays of drama.

Sometimes I feel like I've been cast into a company of fools. Someone suggested to me earlier that it would be nice if they grouped together everyone with the highest ASVAB scores, or maybe more mature folks, in the same platoon. I jokingly answered that such a platoon would probably consist of a handful of people. It surprises me that many people here are having difficulty following even the simplest instructions given by the Drill Sergeants. If I were a cadre member here, I would probably find it easy to lose my temper as well.

I'm taking a break from letter writing now to go back to the rote memorization of items from the "smart book" we've been issued. I am currently working on learning "The Soldier's Creed". It seems like I've read this book several times already, and I crave something, anything other than the IET Soldier's Handbook. I believe my brain has begun to atrophy from lack of non-military stimulation...